My brother is one year older than me. He has extreme anger issues( and is very strong) and he cares way more about his friends than he does about his own family. My family has given my brother everything: unconditional love, support. But my brother just fails college, gets into crazy debt and breaks things in the house(due to anger). I tell my mother and father to tell him to get out of the house but they worry that he will ruin himself even more. My happy family is being broken because of my brother, sometimes i feel like taking a rod and breaking his arms and legs, so he can just sit home.
What can we do about him? My family's peace is more important to me than anything.
2007-08-18 15:01:17 · 6 answers · asked by Carbon41 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
First of all its not up to you , its up to your parents. There are so many families like yours out there that do the same thing....... they say they dont choose one child over another, but its so clearly evident that they do..... they need to use some tough love...... get him out of the house.... he needs to get a job, move out...... he will never stand on his own two feet as long as Mommie and Daddie keep making excuses for him............
2007-08-18 15:09:56 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Hi. I think I might be your sister. At least, we might have the same brother.
I've spent years stressing and worrying and trying to at least contain the damage brought by my brother's rage and recklessness. But I'm just now realizing (and it took *me* going into counseling to figure it out! @_@) that we can't get through to our brothers any more than we can stop a charging bull with bare hands. Threats, reason, pleading...none of it matters.
All that I've found I can do--and all I can recommend to you--is to channel all your energy into your parents' needs. Spend one-on-one time with each of them to cheer them up--just talk about stuff. And make sure to succeed in every way that your brother fails. His grades are bad? Make sure yours are good. If he can't handle money, be sure that you spend wisely. The idea is not to make your brother jealous....but parents need to feel like they've succeeded in some way. They need to feel like they have at least ONE thing that turned out OK.
Concentrate on your parents and any other brothers or sisters you might have. Prop them up. Its the only thing you can do that will actually work.
Getting your brother into counseling will be tough, if not impossible. But you may want to seek counseling yourself.
Yikes! MY bro just came in the door....I gotta go....good luck!
2007-08-18 22:28:16 · answer #2 · answered by YearoftheRat 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Your parents are not helping your brother at all.They are enabling him to act this way and putting up with it.
They need to use tough love and tell him to leave.If they get tough,he may smarten up and realize they're not going to put up with this any longer.It's not fair to them or to you either.
If he ruins himself even more,then that's his choice and he will have to suffer the consequences.Maybe this is what he needs to make him see daylight and one day make him appreciate his family.
Some have to learn the hard way.
2007-08-18 22:23:04 · answer #3 · answered by sonnyboy 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Let you parents know how you feel. Ask them to look into some family counseling.
2007-08-18 22:18:17 · answer #4 · answered by calimari 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
test him for drugs and get him counseling
2007-08-18 22:07:29 · answer #5 · answered by anon 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
stop pulling you self off in your sleep and say sorry.
2007-08-18 22:12:31 · answer #6 · answered by nicola p 2 · 0⤊ 2⤋