I am dating a guy in his late 30s and I'm early 20s, we get on great, but we seem to be having a few text message arguments lately, where I say something he doesn't like, eg yesterday we were going to see each other but as I wouldn't let him come to the house as I hadn't tidied up before my parents came home, he decided he'd lost the mood and didn't want to see me as I'd made him feel hurt and 'unspecial' as though I didn't want him there!
I tried explaining but then he said he needed some time and now he's not been in touch, he's done this before, but he does it a lot, and it's always over something small and pathetic and I ALWAYS have to apologise and be all nice! Then he'll get in touch again, but it's so annoying, why can't he just accept my apology and clear the air? Do all men sulk like this? Any thoughts would be appreciated to help me understand and not be the big bad wolf he makes me feel!!!
2007-08-18 11:23:15 · 18 answers · asked by Michelle 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
He's nice enough and we get on great and we talk a lot, but the slightest thing and he sulks, but his pet died a few weeks ago and he didn't talk properly for a good ten days or so.
After these little sulks he has, we get on fine and never mention them, but sometimes I feel like he has to be in control as he's older.
It's almost like he sulks and then realises he's been an idiot and comes back again, but why it takes him two or three days to do that i don't know.
Maybe we're both too stubborn, but if he told me things before it turns into a row, then it wouldn't happen. I just don't like falling out with people full stop. It's just pointless and unnecessary, how can I make him see that so we get over these spats quickly and not make them last for days?
2007-08-18 11:51:20 · update #1
I do really care about him, and no I don't have a boyfriend. I don't want to condemn him or else I would just get rid. I'm crazy about him, but when he does his quiet thing I don't know what to do, apart from leave him to it. I want to cheer him up and make him smile again, I love nothing more than making him laugh and smile. I just want to understand him, and why he does the quiet thing.
2007-08-18 12:04:37 · update #2
Do all women put their parents thoughts before their guy? Hardly any wonder things don't work out. Ever thought he may not believe you? Emotional blackmail my @rse. Is that the "in phrase" for ..my guy's suspicious and its going to be a struggle keeping secrets from this bloke?
why not just let him go then, instead of coming on here and belittling him?
2007-08-18 11:34:31 · answer #1 · answered by ~☆ Petit ♥ Chou ☆~ 7 · 2⤊ 1⤋
Firstly your age difference will make this appear a worse problem than it is. But I would suspect just how important you are to him, to me it doesn't seem like you get the respect and love you deserve. I personally would give him a miss as he will make you miserable. Most men would sulk, but only for a very short time and then act as if it never happened, where a woman would tell you about that little thing you did wrong 10 years ago for ever or is that just my wife. You obviously are attracted to older men but beware, they will see you as a trophy girlfriend and not perhaps someone to spend your life with. They are just being 18 again.
2007-08-18 13:32:48 · answer #2 · answered by Numptey 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No I doubt all men do. Every man is different and does things different ways. Just unlucky the guy your dating is like that. I would talk to him about it. If you can't stand it any longer I would leave him.
2007-08-18 12:32:23 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
funky monkey, fancy that..your man doesnt like you laffin at him behind his back.! Who would? meaning he finds out second hand.
If we're to discuss, then how come the verdict has already been cast in the question? The guy cant win, end of!
It might be worth asking why she had to text her bloke instead of ringing him? was it because texting is quieter so ANOTHER bloke couldn't hear? Well, thats what her bf could think. How can his reaction be manipulative then? duh!
2007-08-18 11:54:14 · answer #4 · answered by jenniesrainbow 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Jennies right , how can we have a discussion when it is obvious your question is worded to condemn your fella and to win sympathy for yourself so that you dont feel bad for messing him around and not being understanding of his situation. No one says give in to him, but dont pull him down for gods sake. thought you loved him?
2007-08-18 11:59:37 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
He sounds a bit manipulative, to be honest. Has you dancing rings around him .... plus he's a lot older. He seems to like to bask in the centre of your attention, and doesn't like it when you don't or can't give him this attention!
I think you really need to think about this, where it's going.
2007-08-18 13:21:46 · answer #6 · answered by Orla C 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Get used to it love, my husband is a real mardy a*se and although I love him he really gets on my nerves sometimes. I tend to laugh at him behind his back which he don't like. You are not the big bad wolf, men can really be mardy gits, and need to let go of mummy's apron strings. Don't let him get to you, and tell him to grow up.
2007-08-18 11:47:49 · answer #7 · answered by Jeanette 7 · 0⤊ 2⤋
What an immature prat! No not all men bahave like that. Get rid x
2007-08-18 11:51:53 · answer #8 · answered by Beffy Boo 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I think they probably do, yes! And they get upset if you don't think every idea they have is marvellous, etc. We are trying to resdesign our kitchen which if 2 women were doing it would be easy-peasy but if I don't agree with every bit of the design my husband has made he just throws the paper at me and says Oh, YOU do it then! Rational discussion is tricky!
2007-08-18 11:33:08 · answer #9 · answered by Sue C 4 · 1⤊ 3⤋
Men get PMT at their time of the month just like us girls.
2007-08-19 11:17:18 · answer #10 · answered by Liz K 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋