Help, my son will be 5 in September should I send him to Kindergarten or wait a year.?

Question

My son turns 5 in mid september. We have been struggling with the deciscion whether to send him this year or wait a year, I haven't slept in weeks. He wants to go to kindergarten he is very excited. But, i am nervous he doesn't know many letters or letter sounds. He is small for his age but, he is smart. His Pre-School teachers told me to keep him back beacause of his size & age. We didn't completely agree. We were going to hold him back and recently thought he would be o.k. in Kindergarten he is so excited about going but, I am nervous and worried he may not be ready. Can anyone give me advice on this. Am I getting stressed for nothing. Should I listen to the Pre-School teachers or give him a chance in Kindergarten?

Answer 1

My son has an August birthday and we started him in kindergarten at 5 last year. He was one of the youngest students in his class, but he did awesome. I was amazed at how much he learned in just one year. Our school has an wonderful kindergarten teacher and she had all the kids reading books (albeit really easy ones, of course) by December. She also had them keep a journal - it was incredible to see how much progression there was in writing ability from the first day of class to the last. He was definitely able to keep up with the "older" kids.

I had many people say that I should hold him back for one year, that he was too young, and it's especially hard on boys starting so young. I didn't believe them and I'm glad I didn't. He was excited to start kindergarten and we were excited to have him start kindergarten.

On of the posters above gave a list of things that kids need to know in kindergarten - ours had basically the same list, but they did not need to know those things in order to enter kindergarten. We received four report cards and there was progression for each item on each report card.

You may be stressing yourself out for nothing. Give your son a chance and let him go to school this year. The teacher will keep you apprised of his progress. And, at least here, they encourage you to talk to the teachers often and even visit/help out in the class.

Good luck!

Answer 2

It really depends on his maturity level. If you had a preschool teacher tell you that he's NOT ready, keeping him out may be something to consider but it's not necessarily the "end-all/be-all" either.

I'm a teacher (kinder and 2nd grade) and I have to tell you that MOST kinders come in not knowing their alphabet, sounds, and numbers- and 99 percent leave kindergarten knowing everything they were supposed to pick up and more. They get acquainted for the first time in school and learn fast but school programs are moving faster and faster and expecting more and more as the years pass-- and I'm not entirely sure it's for the best. Some kids aren't ready for that kind of pressure and it makes you feel, as a mom, like you're child is slower than the rest and that's just not true in most cases. They are normal, the expectations are higher than ever before.

Still, I think you should let him try it... there's nothing wrong with going in to his teacher on the first day and explaining that this is a "trial" and you'd like to see him succeed but if he's more frustrated than ready, you're open to taking him out. As a teacher, I'd be happy to know I had a parent who wanted my feedback and was open to change if it didn't work out. Either way, nothing you do is going to damage him permanently- kids are resilient- and so are moms. Good luck to you.

And by the way, the person above mentioned that registration and class schedules were already made--- no, not so- not even close. In my years of teaching I've NEVER had a set schedule until a week or 2 into the school year and kids bounce in and out of kinder all year long. Trust me, it's not too late.

Answer 3

Give him a chance. If he's not ready than you will know and you can pull him out. He is not too young and will be the same age as all the kids when school starts. My brother was born in October, and was small for his age (he's 25 now and still small:) he is great. My cousin was born two weeks before my brother, and they held him back and he actually did worse in school. His maturity suffered for his age for a long time. It was like he was a year behind my brother in everything! He always seemed so much younget, even though he was actually older! They are both fine now, but i think it would be good. he's excited, and if he's not ready than you both will know and you can deal with it then. Trust your child and maybe speak with his kindergarten teacher and see if there is a way that she/he might be able to spend just a little more time with your son, and ask her for suggestions on things that you can also work on at home. Everything that they do in the classroom, you can reinforce at home and make sure that he doesn't fall behind. Good luck! and get some sleep:)

Answer 4

If he is nearly 5 and doesn't know many letters or letter sounds, but has been going to preschool, then his teachers weren't doing their jobs very well. If they recommend that you hold him back for a year based solely on his size, they are fools and shame on them. Size has nothing to do with his learning ability and 5 is the typical age to start school. What would holding him back for another year accomplish? He'd know his letters and sounds better? He will very likely catch on quickly when it's gone over time and time again in the classroom. Of course you're nervous. That's completely natural. I have 3 kids and I got nervous with each and every one of them starting Kindergarten. I'm nervous for my oldest again this year since she's now a freshman in high school. Teachers are there to teach and your son will be taught everything he needs to know to excel. In Kindergarten, they will go over every single letter of the alphabet - upper case, lower case and the sounds that each of them make. They will learn to write them all, spell their names and read. If he needs extra help, his teacher will let you know where he needs the help and how you can help him at home. Personally, I think you should listen to your son and not the preschool "teachers". It's hard to let your little one go off to the "big school", but I'm sure he'll do great - and so will you. Congratulations on starting Kindergarten!

Answer 5

I don't think being a small size is a reason to hold a child back. If he is the appropriate age to start Kindergarten in your school district then I would let him go. Especially if he has a network of friends going into the same grade.

If he is more emotionally immature than his peers or has self esteem issues then you might want to reconsider since he will be one of the youngest in his peer group. Consider how he interacts with the other kids in his age group. Then decide what group his personality he is best suited for.

Answer 6

Most schools have a cuttoff and i know here they have to be 5 years old by July 31st and other area schools have a cuttoff of August 1st or 2nd. We don't have any schools in Ohio that go up to September because school starts at the end of August/beginning of September so the answer here would be wait. It is always better to be the older kid in class than to be the youngest.

In order for a child to be in kindergarten they are suppose to be enrolled by the beginning of August and they need to be prepared for it because it can be a very stressful time. Some schools don't allow late enrollments in Kindergarten

Answer 7

i would let him go if he is struggling in kindergarten that teacher may keep him back, but atleast then you would know, i did this with my now 18 year old, he is a november baby, in kindergarten i was told he was younger then the other kids and said that was the reason he wasnt applying himself more but then some kids his age were doing well just depends on the child, i kept him back in kindergarten it did help though, but its your choice so good luck, by the way my son ending up doing very well in school

Answer 8

My wife and I have been discussing this very thing for about a year now. I have a son that was born towards the end of July and the cut off date is August 1st. My wife (a first grade teacher) began speaking to other teachers and parents and everyone she spoke to who held their sons back said they never regretted it. Some of the parents who didn't hold their son back said they did regret it.

One teacher even told my wife, in her b4th grade classes, she can tell the kids that had summer birthdays and were not held back - just from their maturity level.

A couple of things to consider:
1. If he goes to Kindergarten and is held back next year, how will that affect him (when his class moves on without him
2. How is it going to affect him socially if he is always the youngest in the class (and maybe on of the smallest) as opposed to one of the oldest.
3. If he is held back, what will the school do to make sure he is challenged appropriately.

Based upon all of this we have decided to hold him back a year. Not just looking at this year, but looking beyond this year and the impact of the decision throughout elementary school

Answer 9

I started kindergarten when I was younger than your son, I was going to turn 5 that November. I, personally was ready but it really depends on your son. Just because your son is small shouldn't really make a difference. I know some people who held back their child because of size and now they are really big.

Answer 10

if he is wanting to go by all means SEND him.. he may be small in size but his brain is not small give him the best chance for education that you can.. In later years as with all children he will not want to go to school and you will have to make him, Give him a chance to keep up with other children, he will learn more than you think. check and see if the school has half day kindergarden try that and see how he does then go for full day .If he is held back a year he will be behind children his own age, and he will feel "stupid" do not let him feel this way , Send him, give him a chance