if i really had my way, it'd be family and like 2 close friends.. since we might have it at our house..
i know we can't get away with that though.. we have to invite some of our other friends.. but then there are those friends that you don't hardly talk to.. you know.. the ones that you see only when it's someone's birthday and they show up to the dinner too, or that you hear from like once every 3 or 4 months... is it bad if i don't invite them?? it will probably eventually get back to them that they weren't invited to the wedding... what do you guys think??
2007-08-17 15:24:28 · 27 answers · asked by idgaf 5 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
Make a list of all family and friends.
Then, from that list, make a smaller list of immediate family and friends you want at the wedding.
Send wedding invitations to the smaller list...and after the wedding, send wedding announcements with a wedding photo to everyone on the full list.
2007-08-17 16:35:42 · answer #1 · answered by Kat 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
When I was married, it was our immediate families. My nephew just got married last year and it was the immediate families. My daughter is now planning to marry, and it will be the immediate families. They're planning a party for friends and relatives to celebrate the occasion, but it may be a year from now. There is nothing tacky about what you propose. The engagement "diamond" was a marketing ploy by DeBeers, not a tradition. The lavish wedding and reception celebrations are a marketing ploy by those who make a living off the marriage industry. I'm Lutheran, so we have infant baptism. It's a part added to the Sunday service. I'd be just as happy to stand up and be married in front of the congregation as an extra part of a normal Sunday service in exactly the same way. Your marriage is your marriage, not a social event. Don't let anyone twist your arm with the guilt of possibly being tacky.
Although yes, you do have to invite the weird brother.
2007-08-17 15:38:48 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
You can invite just your family and a couple very close friends. The bride and groom choose the guest list and may invite anything from the minimum number of legal witnesses to the entire town if they so desire and can afford to have them.
There is nothing wrong with choosing an intimate guest list and leaving off people you barely speak to for months at a time.
Plenty of people can't afford or don't care to invite every single person they're on speaking terms with. I'm sure they'll understand.
ETA: DTA is mistaken. There is no rule that you must invite anyone based on the how many months pass between the times you speak to them. Etiquette is not concerned with the number of your guests, but how you treat them when they get there.
2007-08-17 16:26:06 · answer #3 · answered by gileswench 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You invite who you want to the wedding. If there are those you do not want to invite then DON'T invite them!
You don't have to invite anyone you do not want to invite. If they get word of it and say something to you just state you wanted a small budget friendly wedding and couldn't do that inviting everyone, so you just invited very close family and friends.
2007-08-18 01:13:08 · answer #4 · answered by Terri 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Very good question. My wife and I didn't get married because we didn't want to deal with who to invite. It's crazy but true. Later we kept it real simple and decided that if anyone was going to mention not being invited we would deal with it then because ultimately it wasn't a personal attack, it was that we didn't want to finance a party as important as our wedding for absolutely everyone we knew - not everyone really cared that much about it to begin with. So we narrowed down our wedding party to those individuals we absolutely had to have and knew would behave together and have fun celebrating us. That included some family too as hard as that was - so in the end, it turned out great for us, exactly what we wanted, and those who may have been temporarily hurt eventually got over it. OK. Good Luck and congratulations.
2007-08-17 15:46:14 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
It's your wedding...that is the thing you need to remember first and foremost! It isn't bad if you don't invite certain people. They will get over it if they care about you at all. They should understand that you want a small wedding. Just have a reception everyone can come too, that might calm things down! Just invite those closest to you and make it a day that is special to you. Congrats!
2007-08-17 15:28:58 · answer #6 · answered by Pineapple Princess 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
You know what? I think it is more tacky to invite people that you hardly ever see or hear from, or worse dont even know. Why should you invite your 3rd cousin you havent seen since you were 2 or your mother in laws friend who you dont even know or your friend from high school that you havent seen since then.
It seems like you are just inviting them to get a gift.
I am only inviting people that are near and dear to me and in my life now..........it just gets out of hand otherwise. And since you might have it at your house, you have the perfect excuse not to invite them....it was a small and intimate private wedding you can say.......Good luck.
2007-08-17 15:30:15 · answer #7 · answered by bluegirl6 6 · 5⤊ 0⤋
This is interesting, because we are having the same issue. I have gotten some good advice from family and from prayer. This is a COMMITMENT, a very serious one and one that should only include those that you can count on to support you and your spouse through the years and the commitment that you make to one another. You should ONLY invite those that are close, and if you believe you should, send announcements after you are married. This is a sacred bond and the beginning of your new life, you should have only those you know very well there. Good luck and GOD BLESS YOU!
2007-08-17 17:33:59 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
I don't think it is tacky. It is your wedding so you should invite who ever you want. I have a few acquaintances like that too. If any of them invite me to their wedding I'd be very surprise. I might not want to go but I would feel bad if I don't go.
2007-08-17 15:45:40 · answer #9 · answered by Caitlyn 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think a wedding is a day to enjoy with those close to you,the ones sharing in your joy.If you dont see these friends but every so often I wouldnt invite then
2007-08-17 15:29:30 · answer #10 · answered by mama_grunther 1 · 3⤊ 0⤋