Perhaps this is a stupid questions, but I've gone on three dates with a guy. I've looked stunning all three times, but he hasn't complimented me on anything--personality, shoes, car, accomplishments, food choice--nothing.
Can someone tell me what it means when a man doesn't pay a compliment? (He's still calling and asking me out...).
2007-08-17 10:26:59 · 66 answers · asked by kerber22 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
It means you need to GET OVER YOURSELF
2007-08-17 10:30:52 · answer #1 · answered by Pat Smear 4 · 10⤊ 6⤋
Maybe he's just so stunned he can't think of anything to say. lol. Some guys honestly just aren't that good at giving compliments. Since you've gone on only three dates, he may feel that complimenting you so soon would be too forward. He probably just doesn't want to scare you off.
Break the ice by complimenting him first, something simple like, "Wow, you look great tonight." If he does his hair differently, mention that you like it. If you're at dinner there's a silence, stare at him from across the table and say in a soft voice, "You know, you have amazing eyes." This will help him to warm up to the idea of complimenting you back, and let him know that it's okay. Before you know it, he'll probably be doing it first.
Or, you could always take a more direct approach by just smiling and saying something like, "Well, how do I look? Do you like my dress? It's new." Turn around so that he can see, and listen to what he says. If he does compliment you, thank him with a big smile (and maybe a kiss on the cheek, if you like). If he starts stuttering, well, take that as a good sign anyway. lol
Since he's still calling you for dates, it means he's really into you, so you haven't done anything wrong. Just remember that body language can tell you a lot more about what a guy is thinking than words ever can. If he spends long periods of time staring at you, if his pupils dialate when you look into his eyes, if he touches you in intimate ways -- whether or not he speaks his mind about how you look, you'll know he likes what he sees.
Good luck. ^^
2007-08-17 10:29:57 · answer #2 · answered by Riven Liether 5 · 3⤊ 0⤋
He may just be too nervous to say anything. Give him a few more dates and see. Some people just need to feel more comfortable with someone before they can give compliments b/c it kind of puts them in a vulnerable position and they aren't sure how you'll take it. You might try giving him a simple compliment to start the ball rolling. Also, if you're really hot, he may just think you hear it all the time and doesn't want to make you think that he's just seeing you for your looks. You can tell by reactions and facial expressions whether or not he thinks something is cool. On the other hand, if you're really dolling yourself up, he may just prefer his girl to wear less makeup or dress a little more laid back.
2007-08-17 10:36:50 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
That he's not a compliment giver? That he thinks you're really hot-looking but he's too shy to say it for fear that'll make you think he likes you more than you like him? That he's gay? Who knows? You would, if you asked him.
I mean, is it really important in the scheme of things? If he's still asking you out and calling, it must mean he likes you, right? Or maybe that he's bored and you're willing to break up that boredom. I dunno.
I guess what I'm getting at is it's such an innocuous thing. And no one's vanity needs to be served if it's the only thing they're interested in serving. Ask him the next time if he likes what you're wearing, how you smell, whatever little attention fix you need and see what he says. And if he compliments you, you could ask him why he hasn't before now without prompting from you.
2007-08-17 10:36:26 · answer #4 · answered by dangerouspoet 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
so the guy is an idiot. He is still chasing you - so he is interested
He might not realise, that he should compliment you.
Have you tried complimenting him - see if he follows
He's in love? Love sometimes interferes with common sense - he must of told you that you look beautiful at some point. Surely its one of the first things you should say.
Never know he could be online now reading your question, thinking up nice things to say at this very second
have a good date next time - drop a hint, but not to heavy
2007-08-17 10:43:11 · answer #5 · answered by steven m 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
He may not compliment you for several reasons. Maybe he doesn't "know" how. In other words, most guys learn by example. If his father or older brothers never complimented women, then he won't either. So, maybe you can "teach" him. Ask him, 'How do you think my dress looks?' Or, 'Do you like the shoes I'm wearing?' And let him know that you like being complimented. Remember, guys are not mind readers. Sometimes we need girls to tell us how we can make you more happy.
2007-08-17 10:38:29 · answer #6 · answered by Roman28 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well, usually in the very beginning of a relationship, a man will compliment. Then, after you've been together a while, forget opening up the doors, forget the "Oh, you look nice today, I like your hair". I guess we get sort of stale. I've been with mine now for three years, and I feel like its been twenty. Men are just like that. They can't help it. Do you compliment him? That might help. It is after all a two way street.
2007-08-17 10:38:25 · answer #7 · answered by what u talkin' bout? 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Maybe he's too shy or he doesn't know how to give a compliment or he might be afraid of sounding stupid. The next time you go on a date you be the first one to give a compliment and hopefully the guy will reciprocate.
2007-08-17 10:34:19 · answer #8 · answered by butterfly 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Perhaps he simply doesn't realize that you would like a compliment, or he doesn't know how to compliment you without it seeming offensive. Maybe he's just so amazed that he's dating you that he can't find the words to express himself, I've certainly had that happen before. You might try paying him a few honest compliments to see if he "gets the hint."
2007-08-17 10:31:53 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It honestly doesn't mean a thing. He probably has not been coached in such things by a mother or mother figure, and doesn't know that a beautiful woman likes to be complimented.
The only time I expect compliments from my husband are when I'm dressed to the nines to go to the theater.
In all fairness, he is always attentive and gives compliments whenever he believes they're warranted.
Try giving him a compliment and see if he returns one. ("The blue in that shirt is an exact match for your eyes!")
2007-08-17 10:32:38 · answer #10 · answered by felines 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
him calling and asking you out is a compliment it itself. are you so insecure that you need to be told how beautiful you look? some guys just aren't into that sort of thing. that doesn't mean they don't appreciate your looks and all the trouble you took getting dressed for the date. and then he may not have seen anything to give a compliment on. as soon as he feels comfortable giving compliments i am sure he will bowl you over with them. hang in there.
2007-08-17 10:34:41 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋