Was he cheating on his girlfriend with me or is he now cheating on me with his girlfriend?

Question

Last week I slept with a guy that I like for a while.I've known him for 10 years.It all happened so fast,one minute we were flirting, and then he kissed me and the next thing I know we had sex.It was amazing.Since then we saw each other twice. First time he said hi and asked me to meet him at this bar where we met.But that night I had to go home early before we met.I saw him when I was leaving and he talked to me and even remembered some things I've said that night.Yesterday I saw him finishing work, and he said hi but then his friends came so I left.Soon his (ex?) gf came and talked to him.Then he went with her and their friends to the beach.On the way he saw me and said hi again but didn't talk to me.I'm confused...is he still with her?They didn't kiss or anything,they just talked.Maybe they stayed friends.But what if they're back together?Or were together when I slept with him?But then he wouldn't have kissed me in public and wouldn't say hi in front of her.Please help!What do I do?

Answer 1

Be straight with him, ASK it's never going to hurt the situation if you ask him WTF is going on.

.Asking him is the only for sure way you're going to get the answer you're looking for.

.In fact I wouldn't be so quick to assume that he and his ex are back together or have been the entire time. Then again, it's not unheard of either...so don't get me wrong..I understand why that idea would be weighing on your mind heavily.

.So I suggest that rather than make assumptions and think the worst of this situation, just CALL him up and just say something like:

"Hey __(his name) I was wondering when you have some free time, would you like to get some lunch with me?"

.Or if you see him in person, nicely grab him and pull him aside...and state your case. Just be up front and casual and don't make accusations or make him feel as if you're attacking him though.
.Just say........
"So I just wanted to clear something up really quick, I was just curious to know if you and your ex are still together and have been the whole time..even when we slept together? Or if you two are just still good friends, because I noticed that you didn't really aknowledge me that one day when you were around her...and I just thought that it was weird..since you never had a problem saying hi and stuff before."
"Anyways...it's not a big issue, but I would just like to be clear on what's going on, because I hate making assumptions."

Then he will tell you the answer. Go from there.

.Good luck.

.Until you know what's up for sure with him and the X then I wouldn't judge the situation.

.....*

Answer 2

look first of all u had sum fun so no matter the result if he used u, u did too.n assuming he cheated his gf, still u cant say he cheated on u after all its was a 1 night stand he has no obligations. this gf thing is sorta fishy though.look i think right now he is interested in u but dont get too attached, u might end up the hurt one.prod him a little find out his feelings for u,n ask to him straight away about the deal with his??ex.if everythings in a place as u like,then u can have a relationship with him. myy advice overall will be if u find anything fishy or ur inner voice says no, listen to it n run in opposite direction. do not, i repeat do not complicate ur life.

Answer 3

Sounds to me like hes just a lil confused. He seems to have feelings for you. Most guys dont show public affection like that unless they like a girl. Its a good chance the girl he had is currently is ex. But how often do you want to meet your ex's new love attraction? He may have just wanted to keep the peace. A huge thing is to just ask whats going on. If he spends a lot of time with her, maybe you should retract some feelings for him until you know whats goin on. Ive been in a similar situation. And often to avoid conflict with an ex you want to be friends with you dont really show you have a new interest. But ive learned that if they cant be happy with who your with, they arent worth being friends with afterwards. Try to spark up a conversation about the idea of you two and see where it goes. No need to go full force into it, just see if you can coax a conversation.

Answer 4

I have no idea if he is dating. One thing couples always forget is that communication is important. Sex is always top of the list. Next time find out if the guy is seeing someone before you do him!

So sit down with this fellow and ask him if he is seeing someone. Don't make it seem or sound like you will not see him if he is. Stay unemotional when you ask so he doesnt feel pressured into a false answer.

Answer 5

Maybe she's just a friend and your overreacting. But maybe not, maybe she is a girlfriend and said hi to you in front of her so neither of you would suspect anything. I'd say ask him and if you don't think he'll tell the truth, ask her! Most girls dont like cheaters so she should be straight up with you. Good luck.

Answer 6

you shold be straight up with him
ask him what he expects from you and tell him what you expect from him
when i met this guy he would kiss me and even peck me on the lips
he would never ask me to be his gf though
he would act like it and then pretend nothing happened
i got tired of it you know
then out of no where he asked me to be his gf
we have been together since 11.15.2005
but just be straight with him
i mean if he still going out with her to the beach then there might be something there
don't be worried about kissing in public im not into that lol
but TALK TO HIM!
good luck sweetie =]

Answer 7

Where did you kiss? Was it in a booth, in a dark place, etc? Yep, it sure sounds like he cheated on her with you. Yes, he would have said hi in front of her. He probably told her you are just a friend. My advice is to learn from this and no more sex until you get married. Good luck.

Answer 8

Gees, the guys have it so easy these days. You say all he invested in you was a little small talk and then you put out? Hmmm.

You are not his girlfriend. You were his easy conquest. You just added a notch to his belt. You reinforced his self esteem.

What has he done for you lately?

Answer 9

It seems like your view of the relationship is different from his. This is hard to say, but i think he sees you and his ex girlfriend BOTH as just hookups. I'm sorry.

Tell him how you feel! Even if things don't go your way you'll at least rid yourself of this feeling of uncertainty.

I hope I was helpful. If you have any questions, feel free to e-mail me.
Good luck!

Answer 10

The first thing you need to do is to ask him and hope for an honest answer. Just remember though that if he has cheated on you or on the other girl, chances are he'll do it again.