i dont understand why they make the soldiers attend these things , if the soldier does not want to spend his weekend with his co-workers at a water park or a amusement park, why MAKE them? my husband and i see no point in it and are refusing to attend. we did not join the military to make friends.
2007-08-17 04:08:01 · 13 answers · asked by Armywife123 2 in Politics & Government ➔ Military
I know, I hate it too. We both think it's ridiculous and the idea of "mandatory fun" is beyond strange.
However, we do attend when mandatory. There's a brief appearance, some chit chat, then we leave. We both realize it will look bad and reflect poorly on him as an almost E6 to complain about it and/or not show up. He has to set an example for his soldiers.
I don't know many that enjoy FRG things or the "duty days" but that's part of the package I suppose so just roll with it.
(I never had any job where they forced me to go to the office christmas party and would've hated that as well)
2007-08-17 04:27:39 · answer #1 · answered by mrsNO 4 · 4⤊ 1⤋
Alot of times in certain units, the soldiers don't mesh well...be it personality conflicts, or maybe someone isn't carrying his or her own weight. If your husband is having trouble dealing with the other guys in his unit, and you are also feeling negative about your situation, then I can understand where you would not want to attend such a function, maybe you wouldn't fit in. It is your choice to not become friendly with anyone, the military is not in the habit of choosing your friends for you. However, it sounds to me as if your husband's command is simply trying to create an environment where the soldiers and spouses can get to know each other in a less formal setting in order to create a better support system and more camaraderie among troops. You may choose to not attend such functions, but your husband will be required to do so...and your absence will be a detriment to him.
Many years ago as a new military wife, I was asked to attend a Duty Day in the middle of summer...the temperature was well over 100 degrees. I had a newborn by C-Section and a 2 year old daughter and in order to get to the venue, we had to walk a good 2 miles on a rocky path. It was not fun, but I did it, as did many other wives and kids. If my husband can go to Iraq and get shot at, can sleep in the cold, eat MREs and walk with full battle rattle for miles on end...I consider my little hike a tribute to him and to all of those who serve beside him.
2007-08-17 05:44:36 · answer #2 · answered by TxsWitchWAB 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I'm retired Air Force and the underlying point of having a mandatory "fun" day is to help maintain esprit de corps. Also, it is a political social function, where he can interface with peers, leaders, and have an opportunity to share ideas in an informal environment.
The remark "...we did not join....to make friends." is correct; one doesn't join the military to make friends but to gain something for themselves (VA bennies).
But in the military, you do have to build those alliances that will serve you well in combat and peacetime. Go to the functions, show your presence, and then take your leave. It's part of the culture, he joined it, and it's expected of him.
I take it your husband is junior enlisted, which explains why you're asking this question on his behalf. If he wants to be a better leader, then he needs to quit hiding behind his wife and spend some time with his unit outside the workplace.
As the wife of a serviceman, you should, nay, need, to support him as his job is dangerous and he may be called into harm's way. Think about it.
2007-08-17 04:31:52 · answer #3 · answered by Terry E 4 · 8⤊ 0⤋
What is the big deal? I get sick of hearing this. It builds esprit de corps, builds moral amongst them. Helps them to bond and see each other not just as soldiers, but as people. It goes with the territory. You don't have to be the last ones to leave, go shake a few hands and leave, it isn't that drastic. You HAVE to be a new army wife! Look, you should be there to help him make the best of his time in service, help him put on a good face at these things. If you make nice with everybody, you might be surprised...you might actually meet some people and make some friends. Military families move around alot and sometimes we are all each other has...take advantage of it. I proudly go to organizational days and hail and fairwells with my husband, it give me the opportunity to my dh with his soldiers and with his superiors. I enjoy seeing the respect and admiration they have for him. It makes me proud!
2007-08-17 05:15:50 · answer #4 · answered by hooahwife 3 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Mandatory fun days are necessary so that the unit can socialize and become more cohesive as a team outside of the workplace. By refusing to attend, your spouses is showing himself to be NOT a team player, which can backfire on him big time.
he can be passed over for special recognition or duties which could eventually get him promoted. by appearing as a loner, no one will want to work with him or trust him, therefore he will not fit in well with the rest of the unit, and that is BAD for the morale and cohesiveness all around.
He joined the military, he is part of something bigger than himself. he can't just choose to separate himself from it when he wants to.
"because I don't want to" or " I don't want to make friends" is NOT a valid excuse. he could find himself facing disciplinary action, or punished in other ways like extra duty or being stuck with the scut work.
I suggest you seriously rethink your strategy.
2007-08-17 05:35:28 · answer #5 · answered by Mrsjvb 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Going to a waterpark is not too much to ask is it? Be happy he is home at the moment and make the best of the day. As previously stated he is a soldier 24/7....go support the unit, make some friends and be part of the team. If you dont want to, that is your choice. Nobody is asking you to bake cookies and wash cars as a family member but getting SLIGHTLY involved supports him and his fellow soldiers.
2007-08-17 04:38:51 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
I feel your pain. My old unit would routinely have "mandatory fun days" on weekends. It usually consisted of making Marines and their families show up, there's food and whatnot, but not really a whole lot of fun. Typically it'd just be a mandatory appearance and then you could leave after a few minutes.
While I understand the need for unit cohesiveness and whatnot, the unit gets plenty of that every day while at work. We never needed to go to a party to understand that while I might hate the guy on my left or right, when bullets come downrange at us, I'd gladly take one for him.
2007-08-17 05:07:36 · answer #7 · answered by mr_peepers810 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
ouch, don't be friendly with the people who may have to save your lives, how harsh.
Why does the military make us do charity work on our weekends. You are owned by the military 24/7. If the military asked your husband to go to the field for two days, would he refuse?
Grow up and deal with it.
2007-08-17 04:27:01 · answer #8 · answered by Rawbert 7 · 8⤊ 0⤋
Snobs like you are the reason these things happen. You aren't to good to spend some time with your fellow soldiers. You are basically telling everyone that does go that you are too good to hang out with them. Yeah right. You are so disconnected from reality that I am amazed you are in the military. You must be a private. If you are a leader you should be relieved for your crappy attitude. There's no way you are though. You are a private for sure.
2007-08-17 04:23:54 · answer #9 · answered by Martyr Machine 3 · 10⤊ 2⤋
USAA pays a business enterprise day early, so in case you have USAA you would be paid day after today Elli your unit has not something to do with once you gets a commission. the government pays you, not your unit and it fairly is as much as the financial organisation to whilst they choose for to launch the money
2016-10-15 22:35:22 · answer #10 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋