My boyfriend and I are both virgins.
We've talked about having sex for the past two days. && we've even considered it.
We've together for 1 yr && 4 mnths.
He told me that it's up to me whether we do it or not. && the thing that bugs me is that every time I ask him if he's ready, he says that "It doesn't matter as long as I am." He always answers me like that. && I'm guessing that either he's not ready or he just wants to just because I'm ready.
I mean if he's not ready, that's totally fine with me.
So what should I do?
2007-08-17 02:19:21 · 23 answers · asked by moi 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Ohh and he said that he doesn't care as long as I'm ready. That makes me wonder if he just wants to get some...
Maybe I should wait it out a little bit longer...
2007-08-17 02:21:06 · update #1
Okay I've thought about it and I'm deciding to wait. :)
I do have a job && I'm 17.
2007-08-17 02:57:35 · update #2
In my opinion, I think that you have a really cool guy. Most guys that are just out to get some would not care whether you were ready or not, they would try to persuade and pressure you to just do it because that's what they want. He might or might not be ready but he is at least being considerate of you and your comfort and feelings. So don't think he is just trying to "get some", but you know him better than I do. As far as I'm concerned you have been together for more than a year and he has not been pressing the issue all this time, so why start now? It appears that he does care about you because you better believe there are plenty of females out there who would give him "some" without any hassle at all. Consider yourself one of the lucky ones to have a guy who is willing to wait for you. The decision should be one that the both of you decide TOGETHER when you both are ready to go to that psychical level to express your love and commitment to one another. All the best.
2007-08-17 02:34:31 · answer #1 · answered by TRUTH HURTZ 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Talk to your boyfriend, tell him that the way he answered you confused you as to whether he was ready or not, chances are he is really ready but he doesn't want to put any pressure on you and your decision. Since you have been together for so long and he tells you that he doesn't care about sex unless you are ready i highly doubt that he is using you he is probably just as confused as you are. Deciding to have sex for the first time can be very emotional and you must make sure that you are both ready to support each other and talk about your feelings. The most important thing to do before you decide to have sex is find out about contraception, go to your nearest family planning clinic and ask about different methods of protecting yourself against unwanted pregnancy, or you can just buy some condoms. Remember to keep safe. Good luck
2007-08-17 02:34:18 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
You should wait as long as you can. I'm not sure how old you 2 are but I think it is great that you have been together for that long and not have had to have sex yet. It shows that you truly care for each other and enjoy each other. I think he is fine waiting which is why he says it doesn't matter. He doesn't want you to feel like you have to do it. Just wait it out which will make it even more special.
2007-08-17 02:24:30 · answer #3 · answered by Green Eyes 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
IF you are doubting this than maybe you should wait.
Talk to him tell him how it makes you feel when he says it dont matter to him.
It shows alot of self controll that you two have waited over a year.
And if he was just wanting some I dont think he would of waited a year or longer! but if you love him and you both are ready it can be a very wonderful thing! GOOD LUCK
2007-08-17 02:26:32 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Are you married? Are you making enough money to support a child? Are you ready to be awakened by the sound of a crying baby every two hours through the night for the next two years? Think about it.
2007-08-17 02:34:33 · answer #5 · answered by Theodore H 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your over analizing - He wants you to know that "This is a big deal to him" He wants you to know that "Yes I want Sex" but wants to make sure your ready for it. Hoping that you are old enough (Suspect that you arn't) Tell him your ready, and would like to have sex. By the way first time won't be very enjoyable for both of you. To much "Pressure" and first time sex with any one (or first time) is always bad. Start out slow kiss and fiddle a bit then take it from there....Best of luck
2007-08-17 02:31:18 · answer #6 · answered by againyourright 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
If you are in doubt, wait it out. And you should both be 17 or older or it could mean jail time if you get caught. You will know when the time is right. It is when neither of you have any doubts. Wait. It's worth it for the first time to be just right. Make it special.
2007-08-17 02:23:18 · answer #7 · answered by ? 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
If you have to ask, then you probably aren't ready. When the time is right, the question won't come up. It'll just happen. Wait it out. See what happens. If he's waited this long, then he's probably in it for the long haul. Good luck.
2007-08-17 02:24:44 · answer #8 · answered by Carrie C 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
First don't do it until you're ready. Second, you've got a really good guy. He really respects you. Don't read more into it when he says he is ready whenever you are. Most likely he is ready, but he cares and respects you to wait for you.
2007-08-17 02:28:30 · answer #9 · answered by Beach Bum Wannabe 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
you're guessing wrong. he's ready, don't worry about that.
he's doing the noble thing by letting you take control of the situation without any pressure.
just remember, sex is more emotional than it is physical. if you can handle the rollercoaster that comes with coitus, than go for it.
keep in mind that couples in their 20s 30s & 40s should be asking questions that you're asking.
2007-08-17 02:28:18 · answer #10 · answered by robyoung3484 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋