When it rains it pours & we need help! PEASE DONT BE RUDE. THIS IS SERIOUS AND VERY DEVASTATING! PLEASE HELP!

Question

In the past month I was beaten and I also got a death threat from another family member 4 a misunderstanding. The next weekend The family had to make an emer. 6 hr drive cause my g-ma had cancer. At 1st the doc said she had 6 mon. 2 live. She couldnt make it 2 her doc appt. so her doc came 2 her. As soon as she saw her she cried and rushed her into the cancer ward. They said she had a wk or 2 left but 3 d. later she died. I was with her. I had been quite sick but I found there 2 B more important things going on. She was a 2nd mom 2 me and a bff as well. I had never lost someone close. Mom & I r in pieces. 2 top it off we r both very ill and arent suposed to get out of bed for 2 wks. yesterday dad decided 2 serve mom w/ div. papers right after she had a tooth removed. This is the 2nd time hes walked out on us. can you give me ideas or places we could contact in r situation? Moms pays no good and I have a disease, preventing me from working nothing but part time (if that), thx!!

Answer 1

I don't know where you live but churches are ususlly willing and able to help with bills or what not, or if there is a community action in your area. I feel bad for you! If you were beaten did you report this to the authorities? Also the death threat should be reported! Take care of yourself and don't worry about the ones that are making it difficult for you

Answer 2

I'm sorry to hear about all that you have been going through. I understand how you feel about losing your Grandma, as I've been in the same situation you were in regarding the cancer and living far and making it there at the last minute to see her slip away.

If you are affiliated with a church or some community organization, I suggest you seek some help there. Otherwise, search your phone book. Perhaps under the hospital there will be a listing for support groups. Your local paper might even have that list. Or else, look up a local church in hopes they can refer you to some sort of support group. They have grief support groups, like the AA groups, as well as ones for people going through divorce or the like.

If you were beaten and received a death threat, I strongly suggest you take that to the police. If it's on file and it's done again, they will have more reason to arrest somebody. That way, you can be a proactive victim and take a stand for yourself. It may seem like it's pouring down on you, but I know deep down inside there is enough strength for you to get through all of this. It might be a long struggle, but in the end you will be a much stronger person because of your life events.

Best of luck to you.

Answer 3

That's a tough call...I'm sorry that you've had to go through all of these things so suddenly.

If you live in the US, there is a program called WIC (Women in Crisis) that can help at least your mother (not sure about you,depending on your age) a bit financially.

Check into local mission and churches, regardless of your religion convictions (or lack thereof) unless you live in a country where that will get you killed.Try to get a job. If your disease prevents your from working full-time, get something part time or even just a few hours a week - any sort of income helps.

Your father has his reasons for leaving, and maybe he will share them with you one day...maybe he already has. Regardless, your relationship with your father (as difficult as this is) needs to be based on you and him, not he and your mother (as ugly as that can be...).

Find help. Contact family if you have it, missions if you don't. If you know of one, it may be a stretch but try a Planned Parenthood - they often have information about WIC and other things that can help people get back on their feet, since they provide free/near free health care services quite regularly.

Good luck to you - I hope this helps! Remember that you are not alone, and that you are not the only person to have ever been in this situation before. You're going to be okay, just keep your eyes open and your heart pumping. Be safe.

Answer 4

I think you should seek professional help like a therapist someone to talk to because life is like that one bad thing follows another and it seems like god is against you. If you belong to a church talk to your pastor or bishop or who ever is the leader for some guidance. I am sorry you are going through all this I know what you are going through. My step sister was like blood we grew up together had children together I was there for her when her mom died and she was there for me when my daughter was in a terrible accident. We were always each others rock. Along with my real sister. Than Feb 11th of this year she and her four children died in a house fire I was pregnant and 3 days to my wedding and that happened and I had to hear about it a few hours after it happened I was laying in bed watching the news and there it was. What ever happened to them waiting until the family found out. But I still got married and had a beautiful baby but I did have to cry alot and I still miss her but I have to live. It's been alittle over 6 months and I am not over it but I learned to live. God bless and I hope you and your family start doing better soon. I am sorry I could not give you an answer that will solve your problem but I want to tell you I pray for you.

Answer 5

The best answer I can come up with is Al Anon. I don't know if there is any drinking going on, but it sure sounds like an alcoholic family. If that doesn't appeal to you, then shop for a good therapist. You need someone who really pays attention, and gives you good direction. If the first feels wrong, they are. The same goes for every therapist you meet. That's why I say shop for a good therapist. Just like every profession, there are good ones and bad ones. There are also some who are good for your situation, and some who are lost by it. Get one who really makes a difference in your attitudes and feelings. Also, remember you cannot change anyone but yourself. If you remember nothing else I have said, remember that.

Blessed Be

Answer 6

first, press charges on the person who beat you, and also for the death threat. (that could be considered harrassment, and certainly report it if it causes you to fear for your life.) I know that you loved your grandma, and that this is first a terrible shock to you, and second, a very hard time for you to deal with emotionally right now. be glad that you were there, that you got to say goodbye. work through this time the best you can.

as for your other problems, there is really nothing you can do if you are both sick. try to get well. if the fact that your dad filed for divorce put your mother in a financial situation she can't handle, tell her to go to her local government assistance office and apply for help. (this would actually be better if you were a minor.) in that case, if she doesn't make enough, she would qualify for food stamps, TANF (temporary aid to needy families), and AFDC (aid to families with dependent children). these are only temporary things, but they can help if you have no other way of survival. as for your illness, contact your local Social Security office if you have a doctor saying that you have an illness that causes pain or undue stress, and that you are unable to work. if you qualify and you are a minor, your check would be based on your mother's income. if you are not a minor, you would only have to show where you live with your mom but are expected to furnish for your own needs.

I don't know what your particular illness is, or how it would affect your ability to get benefits under Social Security, but if it is by medical necessity that you only work part time, go visit them. I'm sorry that you are going through so much right now, and I wish I could give better advice, but for now, this is all I know. (and we've all been there from time to time. like no matter what you just had to deal with, something worse comes along. just remember, when you get to the bottom, you only have one way to go, and that's up! good luck!)

Answer 7

you just made all my troubles go away. I feel for you and you need to contact your local Red Cross, Human Resources, Churches and other charitable agencies in your city and state. Don't give up and what you have and don't give up on life. Hold your head up and tell yourself that you can make it. If this is the 2nd time your dad has left, then don't let him come back. He will be more of a burden than a help. Good luck to you and your mom and may God Bless you both.

Answer 8

Sorry about your range of unfortunate happenings. I would say contact the local courts for a public defender involving the divorce. As far as anything else see if your community has an outreach program. I wish you luck and there is a light at the end of the tunnel

Answer 9

I ended up being homeless and had a lot of problems. By accident I went to victory outreach. Now I'm not trying to get you into church, it's just that they know how to consul and help others in trouble.
My own church has a youth minister that talks with the young people. My pastor is director of the half way house and so has a lot of experience in helping troubled people.
Here's there website.

Answer 10

tell her ot get lawyer and ask him to for her to make payments. and she can get him back this time big time. that is first and foremost. yes it will be costly but wroth it to take this worm to court and get him for being so mean and never return to him again. i know death is hard but belive me they are happy and not hurting any more and that should try and put you two at peace. believe that is all you can do and pray now and then it helps. i know you are sick but you can help but setting up the payment schedules and stuff and working the stuff balancing that could helpyour mom.