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Ok, so i was in a relationship with this guy who is a pastor, well im not quite sure what i believe in. and he said that was alright. But just the other day he said he can't be with me b/c i don't believen god. and i don't put him first. but doesn't it state in the bible to be happy? i mean does it really say in the bible he can't be with me and marry me and love me b/c im not sure what i believe? I never once put down his religion, and said i would go to church with him. and still he said he can't be wit me. is this true? or is there a loop hole that i can tell him about??

2007-08-16 20:30:32 · 22 answers · asked by gfn06 2 in Society & Culture Religion & Spirituality

22 answers

Nutcase

2007-08-16 21:38:00 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

It sounds a little bit like his reasons may have been more about his own discomfort with the situation than with what the bible says. Otherwise he would not have even entered into the relationship knowing your uncertainty. This is pure speculation on my part. Perhaps he did not feel at peace in himself when his partner in life is not feeling joy as he feels it or does not desire to honor God the way he does. In the long run this could cause you both irreparable damage. It may have been the wisest thing to acknowledge how great the gap is between you and walk away. On a happier note, If you don't know what you believe, wouldn't you rather be in a partnership that would honor your journey and let you search for your own truth? You have an exciting road ahead of you. Learn from this and move on. Good Luck, from a fellow seeker.

2007-08-17 03:53:11 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

The apostle Paul stated that we are not to be unequally yoked with unbelievers.

2 Corinthians 6:14

14 Do not be unequally yoked together with unbelievers. For what fellowship has righteousness with lawlessness? And what communion has light with darkness?

Sweetie, you may think you'd be happy, but eventually religion would divide you and tear you both apart, especially if he wanted your children to go to church and you didn't.

It may seem like a harsh commandment, but there have been far too many divorces because one person was either a believer when they were married and their spouse was not, or one became a believer after they were married and the other didn't.

Paul wrote this commandment to prevent the heartache and pain of divorce over the issue, and to spare children the trauma of their parents divorcing.

Some of the unbelieving spouses have tried to become believers so that they could try to save their marriages, but that didn't work out either because they were doing it for the wrong reasons. An actor can play a part for only so long.

It seems unfair, I know, but in the long run it is really for the best and will spare you much heartache and misery.

If you truly seek God and become a believer in Him, without doing so in order to marry this man, God may allow you to marry him. But you also need to consider the fact that you may not be the one He has chosen to be his wife, and He may have another man chosen to be your husband.

Forgive me, but this is the best answer I can give you.

2007-08-17 03:52:31 · answer #3 · answered by Foxfire 4 · 0 0

Well the bible does speak about being yolked with the unyolked. I am married to someone who doesnt know the Lord. I still married him. A pastor though is really held to a higher accountability in virtually every way. Listen, I feel for you and Im so sorry. If I were you, I wouldnt be content with happily going on my way and thinking he did the right thing. I do understand both sides to this and wished there was something that could be done. Gods peace and blessings to you!

2007-08-17 03:38:34 · answer #4 · answered by Loosid 6 · 1 0

The bible also talks about "being unequally yoked with unbelievers", This is why he had to break it off, If you both got married and you still didn't believe in God, it would cause conflict he is a pastor as well so he would get alot of hard looks from others. A pastors wife is suppose to be by his side for support, so if you can't support him in his work for the Lord, its best not to fall deeper into love. Its nothing personal though.

2007-08-17 03:37:13 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 2 0

I think the reason he doesn't want to be with you in a further relationship is probably because of the future. Since I don't know your full situation, I don't want to say too much, but think of the future. If you had kids, what would they believe? He's a pastor, he knows and loves his faith, and that right there is a great thing. So if he's dating a person who doesn't know what they believe, it puts him in an awkward situation. The Bible doesn't say you HAVE to be happy. It doesn't say you HAVE to do anything. You have choices.

2007-08-17 03:36:36 · answer #6 · answered by Nicole 1 · 2 0

No, there is no loop hole you can use because of this verse in the Bible that you cannot go around.

2Cr 6:14 Be ye not unequally yoked together with unbelievers: for what fellowship hath righteousness with unrighteousness? and what communion hath light with darkness?

Here is that verses interpretation:

v. 14-18 This is a warning to those Christians considering marriage to an unbeliever. What fellowship has straightness with crookedness? "Belial" is Satan.

2007-08-17 03:39:40 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0 1

Let's put religion aside for now. You're with a man who basically was ok with being with you and now is making excuses for not wanting to be with you, right?

1 You're looking for a loophole in order to be with a guy who does not want to be with you.

2 He's using religion as an excuse to solve his personal problems.

After careful diagnosis, I suggest the following remedy;

Stop trying so hard to be with someone who is not man enough to tell you the truth, get dressed up, get your hair done, put on some make-up and then go meet a better guy. Hopefully someone who can show you what religion is really about. Take care.

2007-08-17 03:40:29 · answer #8 · answered by spool 1 · 1 1

Read 1 Corinthians 7

2007-08-17 03:36:59 · answer #9 · answered by tracy211968 6 · 3 0

It does say that he is not supposed to "yoke with a nonbeliever." A Christian's primary focus is his relationship with God, and his relationships on earth come second. As a minister this is of unparalleled importance, since his position makes him an example and gives him a higher degree of authority.

For you, it is not about you going to church. Plenty of people go to church every week because they think it is what they are supposed to do, not because they truly believe. Because of his position he cannot afford to be in a relationship with someone who does not believe as he does.

And you 'choose' to believe either... either you believe or you don't. Sorry, for him God is his priority, and there is no way around it.

2007-08-17 03:38:44 · answer #10 · answered by SDW 6 · 1 1

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