is this fair?

Question

before i start i'm 15 and in highschool. well one day me and my girl friend we're talking, and she started this random conversation about how hot this guy she met in branson was, she went there for a concert for school. she said she talked to him a lot there and they hung out. ok yes i got extremly jealous but trusted her and didn't push it. later that week me and my buddies we're hanging out in the hall way and a pretty good lookin senior walked by, one of my buddies was like wow that girl is so hot. and all i did was nod my head, by gfs best friend saw me told her and she got all pissed. so what i'm askin is, is that really fair? i know she was tlaking to me about it but still. my gf is amazing and gorgous. (i know i can't spell) i wouldn't ever do anything to her to hurt her feelings but is it fair that she can rate other guys but i can't do the same for girls? just was wondering

Answer 1

listin to what i am about to tell you.... scratch that READ what i am about to tell you.

when in a relationship many things will happen that dont seem fair.. what you need to learn is that women are usually crazy.

FAIR does not exist when you have a girlfriend... if she gets mad for agreeing a senior chick is hot then cover up.. just say you agreed with the guys for the sake of agreeing and say your sorry.. looking at another woman even in the most innocent way is a potential landmine with some women.. trust me on this.

so in short no it isnt fair.... but fair isnt relevant...


if you want to email me for more advice on this issue or one like it you can, my account is set so people can contact me.

Answer 2

No it's not fair...you're young...you'll find out it's never fair and to be able to get along you have to bite the bullet sometimes and just say, "you're right," no matter how much you disagree. I think you should just tell her straight up, whatever you do I will follow lead and act according to what you think is OK to do in a relationship by what you do, just like in this situation. There's no disputing it then. For instance, she thought it was ok to talk about a hot guy in front of you so you did the same and she should be ok with it.

Answer 3

NO, it's not fair. If she can talk about "noticing" another guy, why don't you have the same option to do so?! I would remind her of how she stated seeing such a "hot" guy, plus all you did was "nod" in agreement w/someone else! I think her g/f should learn to mind her own business too! It was none of her business to relay any messages about you to begin with. Just assure her how much you care about her, but also that fair is fair & how can she claim what she did was different than what you did. Actually it was! She "voiced" her opinion, you just nodded in agreement! Just tell her to think about it the next time before she accuses you of doing things.

Answer 4

I would definitely tell her how you felt when she was telling you about the guy she saw. Let her know that it sort of hurt you that she did that (talked alot, hung out, etc..) Also tell her that you dont think it's right that she gets all upset when you LOOK at another girl, when SHE looks at other guys, and even hangs out with other guys that she considers "hot". If she has friends that are guys, that's a different story - let her hang out with her guy friends, but if it's just some new guy she just meets, then let her know you're not comfortable with that situation. Every human being will always look at another attractive person - even if they're married - because I believe it's just human nature.

But still just let her know that she shouldn't get upset about you looking at another girl - when she looked at another guy.


Good Luck!

Answer 5

Who said that she can rate other guys? You're not comfortable with it- I would talk to her about it. Some people are just jealous, sometimes without a real reason except for some subconscious drive to fear being "out-done" in a way. Basically, just talk to her about the situation, and explain that you get jealous as well. Sometimes it can be comforting to know that a boyfriend gets jealous like the girl does and vice versa. At least, in my personal experience. You clearly care about her, and her you. You're both uncomfortable when the other compliments the opposite sex, and that just means that you need to talk a little more about it and what it means.

Answer 6

I don't think this has anything to do with being fair, I think it is totally rude to be talking about another person of the opposite sex with your significant other and rating them. Maybe she was just trying to get your attention, she may have been feeling insecure about something and thought she would make you feel the same. I don't believe you did anything wrong unless you did this to hurt her because of what she said. There will always be beautiful people we will come in contact with, if you innocently nodded your head I feel you did nothing wrong.

Answer 7

first thing you might want to learn is that your girlfriend is always right. period. having said that, no its not fair, and she shouldn't be mad, and it sucks that she did get pissed because you nodded your head. i mean, you didn't say anything, how did she know you were even paying attention to your friend, right? but thats not the point. being a girl myself, i think its more a subconscious feeling about being inferior. because guys normally act all tough and macho, we don't think that they'll mind, but as girls we do and most girls aren't afraid to say how they really feel, so we do, not really realizing that you might have felt the same way because you didn't express it. i know, its not fair, i never said it was. but if she really likes you, she'll get over it. and you have to trust that she will.

i hope that i didn't seem too blunt or forward about my answer, sorry if i did.

Answer 8

well it seems 2 me that yall havent been 2 gether 4 a while becuz u guys r fighting over somthin not that big of a deal and if you guys really trusted each other then you wouldnt be getting all upset wit each other no its not fair becuz if she does it then that give u the rite 2 to so if she cant handle it then u 2 dont really need 2 be together in the irst place

Answer 9

I don't think it was right for her to get all upset with you because her friend saw you nodding at another girl. Who knows? Maybe her friend interpreted the situation in a different way, other than the way she saw it. I don't think it was right for your girlfriend to brag about the guy she saw at the concert and expect for you to be okay with it.

Talk to her and let her know that if she brags about some other guy being hot, then you are gonna brag about other girls. Give her a taste of her own medicine, and let's see how she feels afterwards.

Answer 10

no, it is not fair. she should realize that she has talked to you about other guys being attractive, so she should trust you enough to do the same, though all you did was nod in agreeing. you need to make it clear to her that although you both can admire an attractive person or notice their attractiveness, that doesnt mean that you want to get with them, and that you are very happy to have each other.