She is looking for love and has been going on dates set up by a dating service. A few days ago, she told me she went out with a guy but he was too DARK. He was Middle Eastern. She is Asian-Chinese and has said that she doesn't want to date an Asian, but is looking for a white man or Mexican. I am getting the impression that she is a little racists. I am her friend, and I am African American and her remarks stunn me.
2007-08-16 14:26:03 · 14 answers · asked by veaj 2 in Society & Culture ➔ Etiquette
It's less a question of "is she racist?" and more one of "what is racism?".
Does sexual attraction play a part in racism? On the one hand IS discriminating because of race, but does sexual preference matter?
2007-08-16 14:47:16 · answer #1 · answered by A 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
A racist is someone who has a hatred or intolerance of another race or other races.
When she talks to you does she spit out that she hates middle east men? Or does she simply say, "I really don't want to date that guy?"
Maybe she likes the culture of a Caucasian male or she likes the look of the Hispanic man. Maybe she's around them alot more and finds herself excited by that male population.
Rude is someone who is without culture, learning, or refinement.
Is your friend stupid? Surely she's not because if she was rude she might date anyone and dump them later, now that's rude.
All in all, your friend has a different taste than what you might pick for a mate. Maybe she wants a good lucking guy or someone who speaks spanish. You never know, ask her what traits she likes in a guy.
Most of all, it's not what someone looks like it's what in there personality that counts.
2007-08-16 14:41:05 · answer #2 · answered by ~darkest than the nite~ 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I wonder if your friend simply isn't attracted to lighter skinned people. I feel that she really could be limiting herself because love is often found in places you really don't expect it. This in not a racist statement, however, sometimes whites are viewed as "trophey's". This may or may not be the case (one would hope not) and sometimes people aren't aware that that is what the problem is. I bet it's just what she's attracted to. A good example would be tall vs short and so on. If this really bothers you, maybe find a tactful way of wording it and ask her.
2007-08-16 14:41:26 · answer #3 · answered by sunshinek 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
1st girl, you & the rest of you africans need to STOP the dispicable habit of labeling people as soon as they take an action you don't approve of. Now, do you date whomever you want to ? Of course you do, & I do. you must try to put yourself in her shoes girl ! Your friend is not rude ; further, we are all racist to a degree. However there's nothing illegitimate or immoral about that so deal with it. It's clearly not part of human nature to be forced to like everybody ! I'm sure you don't so quit being stunned. If you are a true friend, you will support her choices !
2007-08-17 01:54:30 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can't assume that by those facts! It just means she has prefferences like everyone else. Just like some people won't date people too fat or too skinny for example, or people to loud. It just means she's real picky about the type of person she wants to date.
On my personal list, a black girl isn't my "ideal" type but not because I'm degrading them or their race, they're just not my type and their customs don't sync with mine(not saying that theres not one out there who wont break the mold either)-its my personal opinion plain and simple.
Wether inside she's racist or not I can't tell you but I can tell you that these statements don't suffice in concluding that.
2007-08-16 14:41:16 · answer #5 · answered by Miguel O 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Some people just have a preference when it comes to romantic attraction. It is not so much race as a preference, ie : She could probably get along as friends with anyone no matter what their ethnic background is, but her sexual attraction is a little more specific.
2007-08-16 14:48:49 · answer #6 · answered by crump_73mixerchef 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She is not racist. She just has her favorite flavor. We all have our favorite flavors. Like Method Man said, he likes the Butter Pecan Rican, Chocolate Deluxe or French Vanilla.
2007-08-16 14:36:49 · answer #7 · answered by vixxen 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No I don't think she's racist. She chose you for a friend. She just not attracted to dark skin.
2007-08-16 14:38:48 · answer #8 · answered by physco 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you may desire to speak to her and tell her that it bothers you that she makes those forms of comments approximately you and your bf. Ask her why she is relatively destructive on your bf being black and youthful........ Weigh her solutions if that is in any respect life like or mature sufficient. because of fact if no longer, then she might in basic terms be jealous of your courting along with your bf, and can particularly no longer be a sturdy pal in spite of everything.
2016-10-02 11:56:21 · answer #9 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it doesnt make her racist if she isnt attracted to dark skin,
i dont mind dating someone that is black but i am more attracted to white guys, theres nothing wrong with that, im sure you're not attracted to all guys...
2007-08-16 14:35:25 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋