Hello R&S! What would you do if your child came home and told you he/she was "saved".?

Question

For all of my hopefully, "open-mindedness", if my beloved son came home a fundie I would be hard pressed not to discourage him and try to change his mind. I know I should always allow my child to think for himself. I do know that, but it would be hard for me.

I can see how some people who are devoutly religious might feel that way if their child came home and said they were an atheist.

It must be equally hard for all of us to just let our children believe in what makes sense to them if it is the polar opposite of what we believe.

How different we all are. My son claims to be an atheist at this time, he is 14, and I am totally fine with that, even though I think there may be a God. But if he got "saved", I would freak out.

I am not talking about him becoming a Christian because I would embrace an open-minded Christian. I would freak out if he became a bible literalist and fundie bigot. That would be extremely hard for me to SILENTLY accept.

Answer 1

I would tell them they did not need "saving." And..if they started on the born-again stuff, I would tell them they were created by our god/goddess balance of nature and perfect the first time and born beautifully the first time and don't need to go through it again. And if that did not work..time for some therapy.
Then we would have a serious talk about their low self-esteem and why they feel the need to have others lead them when they are perfectly capable of making their own choices in life and can do that without someone else making them believe THEY have sole rights to God's intent to "save" them. -More like saving their own wallets, I think. Religion today is more business than spirit. And also a talk about their own spiritual connection to God and how they can have a beautiful one without interlopers and others intruding in thier spiritual business.
I have raised my children to explore all religions and spiritualities and one day they will decide how they believe. One child is an athiest,leaning toward agnosticism. one child is agnostic. One child is a wiccan. I am a solitary green, welsh healer witta and my husband is southern baptist and we all live together in total peace and continue to learn more about different spiritual thoughts as we go along! I would be sad were one of my children's spiritual growths be stunted or hindered by one person taking control of their miind and convincing they had to be THAT ONE (whatever...fill in the blank) religion for God to love them.
And by the way..with people like Pat Robertson from that TV show the 700 club out there, the most hateful man I have ever heard speak..supposedly "saving" people..NO THANKS!
Spirituality is like sexuality. It is private and no person but me and my family members have any rights ot know about that. God loves me NOW. I do not need some phoney telling me they can save me.

Answer 2

Don't be like that Gorgeous [its not the first time you post a question like this].

All i can tell you is that that experience must've happened to my father. He's an atheist and a communist, still, he were always very very OK with what I believe, and never suppressed my freedom, he is great.

Since the day I got home and explained to everyone how i was saved by God's grace and by Jesus sacrifice on the cross, my dad has been very supportive. He came with me to a cult [he hated it very very much, still he went] and he is going to my baptism. We never deeply talked about it, but i think we both know that we wouldn't disagree on many aspects [political and philosophical ones], i mean the man raised me and did a very good job.

I hope we can learn a lot from each other.

If your son turns into a fundie, i encourage you to do the same my dad has been doing, you both might be learning and you'll see that, independently of your and his faith, the good, important values you taught him will remain.

Paz de Cristo Gorgeous

Answer 3

I would be curious about which denomination's services he had been attending, because ours doesn't generally use terminology such as "saved" or "born-again". Upon finding out where he got these ideas, I'd dig further into the beliefs and attempt to find out what he had come to believe about religion, and why he believed it. As a Christian, I wouldn't be overly alarmed, but would attempt to point out that we are not Fundamentalists, and would very strongly discourage any of the misogynistic, homophobic or theologically aggressive behavior that often accompanies extreme right-wing Christianity. One can be saved without having to behave like some kind of storm trooper about it. I would congratulate the kid for doing research on his own, but would also say that the door is always open for him to learn about other religions, traditions, and Christian denominations, as well, including coming back to the tradition he was raised in.

Answer 4

Why would that be such a bad thing for you? It is a personal choice for each person. Why do so many people disbelieve in God until they are dying or in deep trouble. No matter he still loves each and everyone of us. Is it so hard to believe that there is a one almighty God that created everything that is. You can only be saved if the Holy Spirit is present. I would be absolutely grateful to God almighty if my son came home and said he had got saved.

Answer 5

Sounds like yours is kinda like my 15 year old.

I think I raised him right and he's protected from that nonsense.

My wife's parents are Christians. I hope if he felt so inclined he'd be a real Christian, not a fundie.
Since he knows if he claimed to be a Biblical literalist we'd make him prove it, it's unlikely.

He was an atheist, now he's sort of a quasi Hellenic reconstructionist. I supported both.

I kinda wish he was an Asatruar, there are worse religions for boys by far!

Answer 6

he sounds old enough & it sounds like you have raised him to think for himself so I think if he said that he would have thought it out first. I became a Christian at 5 yrs old, not because it sounded like a good idea to me, but because I was 5 & my teacher said "ok boys & girls, I want you to close your eyes & ask Jesus into your hearts" I was following instructions, not making a decision.
If this does happen & you are really that worried, talk to him about why it got "saved".What lead him to that decision? Make him research it!! My boyfriend is an atheist, but he knows more about the bible than most Christians I talk to. If he wants to follow a religion, make sure he knows at least enough about it to be able to explain it in rational terms to you. Then if it sounds well thought out, let him go & be happy he found something that makes him feel fulfilled.

Answer 7

I would be extremely happy. that is what I want for my whole family. Of course I understand your point, at the same time I would freak out if he came home and said that he was an atheist. Although you are not supposed to force your child into your beliefs, I would do all that I could to try to help him weigh the options before he chose for good.

Answer 8

How sad indeed! It is your responsibility to teach him the truth and you know that there is a GOD just like you know that one day you will die. Teach him the truth or set him up for failure...L O N G T E R M ! I pray you make the right choice.
Jesus said that if an adult prevented a child from coming to Him that it would be better if someone had put a mill stone (that is a huge round stone) around that person's neck and thrown them into the sea. If he does come home saved you need to remember this.
Now there is no need to go getting all mad because you asked the question and I answered it with my honest opinion and from the Word of GOD.

Answer 9

It doesn't matter much what our children say until they get to about age 35 years here on average. Then they (on average) may be directly Spirit-led soul aware and KNOW (not just believe that they have eternal life in the Two-as-One GOD and JESUS LIGHT of LIFE.

All humans who are not sure are ALSO re-personalized up on a higher mansion world to then make the eternal Final Decision about their eternal life in doing God's will.

There are TWO Persons you can never run-away from:

GOD and yourSelf. (You can run away from "YOURself" though and transcend selfish ego with God's Help)

Peace and progress,
Brother Dave, a Jesusonian Christian Truthist
http://www.PureChristians.org/ Gospel enlarging website,
proclaiming worldwide the True Religion
OF JESUS and ABOUT JESUS and IN JESUS
Come and share !

Answer 10

let me just say that Christians are not a bunch of mindless robots. we think plenty for ourselves. God gave man free will..and that means we choose right from wrong. nothing about that says that we don't think for ourselves. and secondly, i may not have children, but if i did i would certainly be happy because then they will grow up knowing God, and all that he has given us. and most importantly i would know that my child has a relationship with God, and will always know what love truly is, which is something this world seems to harbor less and less of with each passing day.