This rarely happens to me but at the moment I am seriously annoyed. 10 pts for the best- be nice but non-sappy :)
2007-08-16 08:00:07 · 7 answers · asked by Julia Sugarbaker 7 in Society & Culture ➔ Religion & Spirituality
Dammit woman, I'm an atheist, not a whoopy cushion!
2007-08-16 08:09:56 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 1⤋
So three priests are in a boat in a lake, fishing: There's a Catholic priest, a Baptist pastor, and a Mormon deacon.
Suddenly the Catholic says to the other two,
"Oh, I forgot my hat! I'll be right back."
And he walks across the water, back to the shore, gets his hat and comes back.
The Baptist seems unsurprised by this, but the Mormon is amazed. He says nothing however, and the three continue to fish.
A few minutes later, the Baptist says,
"Oh, I forgot my sunscreen. My wife will be so annoyed if I get a sunburn! I'll be right back."
And then HE walks across the water, to the shore, gets his sunscreen out of his car, and comes back.
By this time, the Mormon is so upset he doesn't know what to do. Finally, he makes up his mind that he has enough faith to walk across the water, too. So he says,
"I forgot my extra bait. I'll be right back."
So he gets out of the boat...
And immediately starts to sink.
So the Baptist says to the Catholic,
"Think we should tell him where the stones are?"
Yes, I know it's an oldie, but it's one of my favorites.
Edit: Oh, and I hope I made you laugh. I was trying to. :-) Cheer up, it's not all bad!
2007-08-16 08:14:29 · answer #2 · answered by The_Cricket: Thinking Pink! 7 · 2⤊ 1⤋
Today was our first day of school. I had the 8th grade and they had just been assigned lockers and told to put their stuff in. Not 5 minutes later one of the boys rushed into my room in a panic because he had locked his combination in his locker and didn't remember it. It doesn't sound as funny now, but at the time it was. Hope you feel better.
2007-08-16 10:10:15 · answer #3 · answered by Purdey EP 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Mr. Blue Sky ALWAYS cheers me up, no matter what:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H2Ncxw1xfck
Or another ELO song:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8TLmpL2AzLs&mode=related&search=
Man I love those guys. Jeff Lynne is the second coming....this guy HAS to be one of the most underrated musicians alive today.
2007-08-16 08:09:08 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
The Devil has a bifurcated uvula, and he masticates with Tabasco sauce.
2007-08-16 08:08:18 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Have you lost weight?
WOW, you look hot in those jeans. Seriously.
Wanna go shoe shopping?
Sure, I don't mind talking about feelings.
I'd love to watch "The Notebook" again!
2007-08-16 08:10:13 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 4⤊ 1⤋
Julia....
We love you. Cheer up kiddo.........don't be annoyed.....it takes minutes off of your life when you're annoyed.
Edit:
And what Deke said, too........
2007-08-16 08:07:39 · answer #7 · answered by primoa1970 7 · 3⤊ 0⤋