"I don't care"?

Question

Let’s say you and you intimate partner are having a conversation where you become upset by something trivial (i.e. a tv show or video game). In order to work through these emotions of frustration you reach out to your partner to discuss how you are feeling. Instead of being empathic, your partner abruptly turns to you and coldly states “I don’t care”. Is that a sign that your partner really doesn’t care about your feelings, or just the topic you were upset over? How did it make you feel? What did you do about it?

Answer 1

Ive never been in that situation but maybe hes mad just because all the argument is over something silly.

Answer 2

The topic. Most likely, this is his frustrated, poor attempt to avoid escalating the situation into a full-blown argument with you. He's trying to tell you he doesn't want to talk about it anymore. Women tend to want to work through their frustration with men. What they don't realize (*SPOILER ALERT: SECRET INFORMATION FROM THE MALE PSYCHE COMING*) is to us, this is doing nothing more than beating a dead horse & looking for an argument. We want to say something along the lines of "shut up, you're annoying me to death, can't you ever let anything drop already?", but we know this is going to be something we'll never live down, even after our 50th anniversary. So, we try other approaches hoping for better results, all in vain. Some of us try the walking away approach, which fails. This guy tried the "I don't care" approach, hoping you would get the point that he just did not want to deal with this petty disagreement, because he knew it was going to be blown completely out of proportion. Obviously, this approach didn't work either.

So, you knew this was a trivial argument. The next time you feel an argument coming on, here's what you can do to avoid this problem. Step back a moment, look at the situation logically, use some reason, & ask yourself if it's going to do any good to continue trying to discuss this, since it will most likely tick him off & cause an argument he doesn't want anymore than you do. If the answer is yes, & it really is that important to discuss, talk it out. If not, drop it & forget about "working through emotions of frustration", because men don't want to work through emotions of frustration, we want to clam up, cool down, & be left alone so we can get back to being happy. If you want him to work through emotions of frustration, put on some sports, go do whatever you want to do for a few hours, cool off yourself, & come back when you feel better. If you have to work through your own emotions of frustration, save it for the girls, because we pretty much just hate that sort of thing with a passion. Do that, & he'll be glad you did.

Answer 3

The infamous "I Don't CARE" statement hahaha. Okay here goes. Mainly if I want about anything my partner might be like I don't care. It is not that he doesn't care, I usually just ramble on about the same things. It makes me upset yes that he doesn't want to hear what I have to say but I get my point accross. I fuss and my partner and let them know that I do not appreciate being interrupted and that if I were to be watching like Oprah or something I would definitely tell them to shut up. I did that once and omg he got soooooo pissed off hahaha.
try leaving him be with sec especially. If he ask you to have sex or makes a move to have sex with you, say you don't want to or you're tired. If he ask why, Cause I don't care. He will definitely get the picture and get his act straigntened.

Answer 4

That would definitely hurt my feelings, BIG time. What would I do? Depends. They may have said that because they were simply frustrated and not ready to talk about it. Give it some time, in case that is the problem, then discuss it with them later. If it works out, then great! If they still won't talk, then accept the fact that they are a jerk and they lack basic communication skills. If your significant other is unable or unwilling to discuss basic problems with you, then you are looking at a long and frustrating relationship. They probably DON'T care. I would get out now.

Answer 5

I have been in that situation and in the end it turned out that he was selfish and only cared about himself and his own feelings. although it may have been a stuipd reason to be upset i was still upset and if you truly care about a person no matter how stupid the reason if they are upset you're going to care and you're going to try and figure out why and make it better because a small thing can turn into a big problem.

Answer 6

Perhaps your partner was having a bad day, or was just getting annoyed easily that day. I'm sure they care plenty about your feelings, but maybe the topic wasn't interesting to them

Answer 7

sometimes i think the "trivial" thing that someone gets upset over is not the real issue...in other words they were really upset about something else ...but used that particular thing to get mad over. i don't care has many different facets...they don't care to talk about it...they don't care if it upset you etc etc. i wouldn't read too much into it though ...unless it keeps happening...then i would certainly try to figure out what is really making them get an attitude.

Answer 8

Chances are it's likely just said in the anger of the moment and s/he doesn't care to discuss that topic any more right then.

I wouldn't read too much into it, unless that's a mantra you start hearing a lot.

Answer 9

he is just mad about the topic itself or does not care about the topic itself. he cares about you. My boyfriend is the same way.we will be talking about something or debating and he will say...ok i just don't care anymore. sometimes guys just have no feelings toward whatever it is you maybe talking and or arguing about. Yeah sucks i know and it makes you mad because you care right...well that is just how it goes why, I don't know. BUt he still cares about you he still loves you and still wants to be with you. He just does not care about the topic ( t.v. game show) that you were talking about.

Answer 10

ive never been in that situation before, and who cares if your upset over something silly? the point is that you should be able to talk about anything with him, without him telling you he doesnt care. i would do the same thing back to him next time he is complaining, and see how he likes it! maybe he will understand that it bothered you that way, and if he doesnt, he is just way too immature!
good luck =]