3 yr. old is scared/terrorfied at night time (or nap time)?

Question

he is scared of monsters, snakes, spiders, ect. it started a couple of nights ago he woke up probably after a nightmare about monsters screaming. now even if he is in mom&dad bed he is scared. for instance a monster, crying and actually points to the floor and saying right there! or snakes inthe bed and curls his feet up out of the covers shaking legs stiff, then pick him up and legs are still stiff pulled up as far as he can.
kinda freaks us out too!
during the day he is fine nothing scared of. just seems to be when its time to go to sleep. because this behavor happens at nap time during the day.
does this sound normal? its not like a generic I am scared of this or that, its there is a monster right there next to the night stand!

Answer 1

I had the same problem with my son who is now 4 1/2. We went through a time where he wanted to learn to sleep with his eyes open because everytime he closed them he would get scared and this was also during the day and night too. It sounds like your son is learning that there are things in the world that can hurt him.

The best advice that I have is to be there for him and understand that he is just trying to process this new information. For about 3 months (which seemed like forever) I would sit in his room with him until he fell asleep but I made every effort not to let his fear get the better of him. The instinct is to let him sleep with you but that is such a hard habit to break.

I would sit right next to him and sometimes he would even ask to hold my hand until he fell asleep. It got better but it took time. Just remember to him that monster is real.

Good luck to you all.

Answer 2

My boss has this saying, " If there is an elephant in the room; call it an elephant". In other words, don't ignore his fear.

We've been through this with my son (just not as severe). I started to make a game of it before bedtime. We did "Monster Patrols" every night until it stopped. We checked everywhere in his room (and anywhere else he said he saw one) - in the closet, under the bed, even in the trash can. If we found one, we would act like crazy fools stomping feet, clapping hands, shaking the cloths in the closet - whatever it took to scare them away. Sometimes we even had to "stomp a mudhole" in them (we literally stomped the spot where the monster was). We did have to do monster patrol at 2am a few times. It became more of a game and after a few weeks, the monsters went away.

Any chance that he has seen a movie that may have started this. Maybe you could let him watch Monsters, Inc. The main character is a good monster. It seemed to help my son once he decided or realized that there can be good monsters too.

Also, if you have a pet assure your son that it is part of the cat/dog's job to keep monsters out of the house. In our house, the dog and Daddy keep away the monsters, and the cat and Mommy keep away the bed bugs !!

Good Luck !!

PS I like the monster spray idea. I might try that one myself.

Answer 3

Ok just some ideas, cause i got to thinking...but i don't know:

When you sleep or nap your subconscious becomes more dominant (compared with normal hours). You become more receptive to things outside the daily routine and social events.

Maybe he is trying to get attention or express himself somehow, for some reason and is creating the images somewhat subconsiously..like "acting out"..perhaps to get the response/attention from you that only that sort of situation would provide. (and that he doesn't know how to get otherwise).

It could be a part of normal development..like exploring his fears in a convincing, but safe, way and sharing it with you to get feedback. Maybe there is no other opportunity to devleop his fear response and courage. because everything is too safe.

He could have some inbalance due to genetics, diet, or personality which is letting his imagination become unstable. I guess that could be solved by talking about what he is experiencing in an open and non-judgemental way. Allowing the things he sees to be real if it seems appropriate but being calm about it and realizing that these "monsters" cannot really harm him, and he and you can find ways to be positive, entertained and courageous with it.

I personaly beleive in psychic/spiritual stuff.. So maybe the child is actualy seeing some of this world and just interpreting it as a "monster" or "snake". Many people think children are more sensitive to things such as "auras". Children have very active imaginations, imagination is good but it needs to be grounded in good wholesome security or it can become unstable.

Answer 4

It is normal. His imagination is growing, and he is dreaming/having nightmares. They call them night terrors in children.

You can make him a little spray bottle...fill it with water put a little label on it and call it "monster spray, spider, snake" or whatever he is scared of Then he can go around his room, "getting rid" of the monsters, spiders and everything scary.

Also, what I have heard that works is let him draw the monster on a piece of paper. Then have him go outside to the trash and throw the monster away. That way it is no longer in his room.

Answer 5

Sounds familiar. My son went through this. We just kept reasurring him and putting him back in his bed. My husband also went out and got an airysol can of air freshner and we would spray it around is room everynight. We told him that it was monster spray and it would keep the monsters away! It worked after about a week!

Answer 6

My son just started acting the same way at night. He is always saying there are monsters in the room. I put myself in his shoes and act like I see the monster too. I usually have to go in there and fuss at the monster and put him in time out until the morning. My son seems to be satisfied with that. Good luck to you!

Answer 7

my 5 year old went through a phase like this when he was 2or 3 years old he never actually said what he was frightened of but he really was terrified i spoke to my doctor and he told me that children have night terrors which are dreams but in a way they still carry on when the child wakes up as if they are still asleep or not if you know what i mean . my little boy grew out of them but after a few months and although it is scarey i think all you can do is be there for your son.

Answer 8

Seriusly sir, no wonder you baby believes that you probably believe it yourself or you wouldn't question it. Maybe your the one scared of the monster and you make him believe there is one. Babies don't learn only from the parent. So please tell your baby it's not true leave a night light on for him, and tell him mommy and daddy are here. When my kids were small they were never scared of a monster unless i made them believe some insane something like that. My little boy is 7 and he's scared to sleep by himself he doesn't like the closet. So i made sure that he's safe to sleep by himself, and told him there are no such things as closet monsters.

Answer 9

I would just try and break the habit and keep trying every night to get him to sleep in his bed, and just keep reassuring him everything is going to be fine and monsters are not real, and that he just had a bad dream. Have him sleep with a stuffed animal and tell him it will protect him. There are alot of diff. things to try you just have to find which one would be good for yer son. Best of luck.

Answer 10

did you say it does happen at nap time during the day too? if thats the case it sounds like a ploy to not have to go to bed! my little ones favorite stall at bedtime is "im hungry" cause he knows i wont let him go without something if i think he is hungry. anyway i would keep an eye on him, but if he doesnt wake terrified from these things, its only at bedtime then he is testing the boudaries it sounds like!