Table Manners...?

Question

I would like to know how to follow perfect etiquette at a fancy dinner. I have basic knowledge of table manners, (No elbows on the table, etc.) but would like to be acquainted with the finer nuances.

Does anyone have any advice or links to help me?

Answer 1

It's been a long time since I attended a formal dinner.

If I remember correctly, if you have a waiter at your table, they are supposed to remove your napkin from its holder or from your plate and place it gently in your lap. You start with the silverware farthest from the plate and work your way in through each course. Always try to leave a little something on your plate after each course and when you are done with a course, place the silverware that you did use upside down on the plate (this is supposed to signal the waiter to remove your plate). If you are served bread, the proper way of eating it is to break it or cut it into smaller pieces and if you want butter, to then butter the smaller pieces. If you are served white wine or champagne, try to carefully hold the glass by the stem so that you preserve the chill on the glass. Cut everything into little bites before eating. If a lady at the table should rise to go somewhere or do something, you should rise as well out of respect when she gets up and rise again when she comes back (this is ONLY if a speaker is not speaking or video playing etc).

You may want to check this site out for more info: http://www.emilypost.com/ .

Answer 2

Today, even formal dinners are more relaxed than they used to be. Unless it is a black tie event for a dignitary, you can pretty much relax. One thing I will tell you that really makes it clear that you are more refined than one might think is: when you use your knife and fork to cut something and if you are right-handed, when done cutting, place your knife across the top of your plate and put your fork back in your right hand before you place it with the food in your mouth. Yep, it's a dead give away if you do this that you are indeed on top of things. Napkin on lap, pull out the chair for the ladies, all the things you already know and watch others. Have fun and relax, you don't want them to see you sweat! Look as if this is no big deal, you do it all the time!! Good luck sweetie and have fun.

Answer 3

Be sure to spill something. And laugh.

If you know the basics then anyone who isn't satisfied with your behavior is less cultured than you are. Relax and enjoy!

And don't slurp your soup. 3/4 of a spoonful only and scoop it away from yourself. (That way it splashes across the table not on you.)

I'm having too much fun thinking of bad things to tell you! Maybe you should just ask for chopsticks?

Answer 4

Well, basically you can just watch what others are doing and take your cues from them. That's what I do when I don't know which utensil to use and so on. Generally, you take the fork on the outside first and work your way in as you go through courses. Just watch other people and see. Most of it is just common sense. You'll be fine.

Answer 5

here is a free online etiquette training course. Although its basic, but its informative and fun:
http://www.etiquettepolice.com/

Answer 6

if they have more utensils than you know what to do with remember to start on the outside & work your way in. napkin on lap, seat the lady first, stand if she needs to get up, tip your waiter well.