need some advice??

Question

okay well i need some advice. Okay i am no religion at all (i believe in god and have looked at the bible before) , but my family is a protestant. well my bf is catholic. he wants me to convert to catholic and i said i didnt know if i want to and i asked him why he wants me to? before he said i didnt have to now he wants me to? he said that it will be easier for the children and we all can go to church together ect,..... yet he doesnt always go to church now. he said that this week he wants to go talk to a priest and see what he says if i should convert or not. I feel like i am going to be out numbered i am sure the priest is going to take his side. I love my bf and all, but i dunno if want to convert. i told him that i would go to church with him and the kids if he wants but converting i dunno about. he also said since i am no religion it would be better if i was one.

so, i told him if i have to be one who says i want to be catholic? follow in her footstep ever. So, becoming catholic I am wary of. I mean I know it sounds stupid, but that’s how I feel. Any advice would be nice. I just feel like I am going to be over taken when we go talk to a priest since they wont understand my stand point. Would you just convert if you were me or should I stand my ground?

Answer 1

Stand your ground this is your life and only you can live it

Kahlil Gibran wrote

Your children are not your children.
They are the sons and daughters of Life's longing for itself.
They came through you but not from you and though they are with you yet they belong not to you.


Love & Blessings
Milly

Answer 2

DO NOT convert because someone wants you to. Believe me, the priest will definitely say the same thing, and he will be on your side, not your boyfriend's.
If I were you, I would drop your boyfriend, he sounds really manipulative and he's not even practising his own faith, so he doesn't have anything to say about it at all.
Here's a suggestion. Break up with him for six months. If you feel like you really love him, study about the church teachings, take some classes (going to them doesn't mean you have to join the church), find out what married life could be like for you as a Catholic couple as well as a mixed-marriage couple. Just don't mix your study with the relationship! That's how you'll find out clearly if you would be happy as a Catholic, with or without the relationship.
Then decide if you want to get back together with him.
It sounds like he has an awful lot of growing up to do though. I'd get out while you're ahead.

Answer 3

My son, a protestant, married a Catholic girl and there were initial concerns regarding their eventual kids, etc. They have been married about 18 years now, and there have been no problems. The family (they have two kids) go to the protestant Church and the Catholic Church alternately as occasions arise and seem to have handled the matter very well. You're right in that the Priest will recommend your conversion after you have completed courses in their faith. If you decide to go that route, use it as an educational opportunity and try not to view it as something forced upon you.

Answer 4

Priests are usually really nice. Don't convert, simply join the faith if it brings you peace. There is nothing that says you can't believe that two separate theories are possilbe. I am catholic but also believe in other religions as well. Think of religions as devices to be used to benefit your understanding of god and morality. I hope this helps.

Answer 5

You need to do what is right for you. First of all pray and ask God. My mom and dad were two different religions and it was horrible. My dad resented my mom for not becoming catholic and we all knew about it. We kids grew up catholic and my mom tried to teach us her religion, but it made my dad mad. If you want to go speak with the priest, that would be alright, but you may feel overwhelmed. Hopefully he has enough experience to let you decide for yourself and not pressure you. I know you love your bk, but this is a big issue and should move slowly in this relationship especially if it is going toward marriage.

Answer 6

If your boyfriend wants a traditional Catholic wedding he will want you to convert to Catholicism at some point. If you don't convert a priest may not want to marry the two of you. If he doesn't have to have a Catholic wedding, your conversion may not be as big a deal.

Answer 7

I would definitely not "convert" because of pressure. If this is something your boyfriend needs so that you can get married I would really hesitate about that. It needs to be something you take your own time about and something you need to be convicted on in order to do it. If it were me.....I would ask him what would happen if you do not. Also, if you feel you can...I would go listen to the priest but just let him know you appreciate what he said ...but a conversion needs to be when you feel it is best. Hope that helps.

Answer 8

You didn't make the part of the children clear, as to whether you have them NOW or it's a presumption you will have some after you marry. Anyway, sounds to me that your boyfriend is trying to convert you to his faith and as one who has worked in mental health (evaluator) I can tell you that a person in any relationship that shows the trait of trying to "change" the other will evenually lead to "disaster." Marriage will NOT work. The basis for a good relationship or marriage to in accepting one another "AS IS" and not this venture for changing each other LATER. Wish I could tell you BETTER news, but it has been my experience to see many people who get married only to see them divorce because either they try to change one another after they marry or one or the other changes in behaviors in the marriage. (Takes up drinking or drugs or becomes obese) If religion, is important to your BF, it will be equally as important after you marriage and the subject will not go away UNLESS you resolve it BEFORE you get married.......

Answer 9

It is very personal and serious.
There is allot more than Catholicism out there, it is very easy for me being a Muslim to say covert to Islam, nevertheless do your home work and study all till you feel convinced, it is not easy but worth the effort, so don't be mean with yourself.
have a look at this web site: www.quran-islam.org.
and check other religions as I said it is serious but important.
God bless you.

Answer 10

This is one area you have to stand up for yourself, look at your boyfriend and priest together, and say, "I will not convert. My beliefs are my beliefs and that's what makes me an individual. You can't control my feelings. They belong to me." It's ok to be married and still keep your self respect and believe in your own spirits.