Throughout our secondary school career, me and my best friend used to note down funny or stupid things our teachers said by mistake. Here are some of my favourites:
"Brown eyed parents can often have blue children."
"Imagine you're a lampshade. That always helps me sing better."
"Students can keep their phones in their pocket blazers."
"We'll finish this yesterday."
"Stick your face on!"
"This is bluey-black. It's sometimes called purple."
"Four minutes here are two minutes there; that's eight minutes."
"Please forward any comments directly to me via my personal assistant."
"If the trees fall off in winter, we call them deciduous."
"It's lovely for parents with kids; it's lovely for parents without kids ..."
"I can test you until the cows come out of my mouth."
"I'm talking - no wonder you can't understand!"
"I taught Hitler ... I didn't mean to say that ..."
"Germs don't exist!"
"Stop being clever and stupid!"
2007-08-14 22:51:33 · 31 answers · asked by Perry 4 in Entertainment & Music ➔ Jokes & Riddles
The first one is stupid because she was meant to say "Brown eyed parents can often have blue eyed children", not "blue children"!
2007-08-14 23:01:04 · update #1
ha ha ha funny
2007-08-15 00:44:16 · answer #1 · answered by Luck dragon 7 · 4⤊ 0⤋
Forgive them they are after all just human. My brother was a teacher in the good subjects maths and computing. While he was teaching he was no fun at all. He was always marking papers or planning tests. Thank goodness he gave it up to do more interesting things. He is now a bit more human and a lot less stressed.
2007-08-15 06:02:52 · answer #2 · answered by njss 6 · 3⤊ 1⤋
I had a science teacher who, at the end of the class would say something along the lines of: 'In a minute I'll tell you to pack away, but don't pack away untill I tell you to because if you pack away before I tell you to pack away I'll put you in detention now, put down your pens, did I tell you to pack away? Right, you're all in detention. Now, pack away.'
He was seriously odd. I also had a teacher who was telling us how dangerous this little piece of radioactive metal she was holding behind a screen was, and failed to notice that she'd dropped it and it was rolling across the floor...
...We spent the rest of the class pretending to die horribly.
2007-08-15 14:07:32 · answer #3 · answered by Cpt. Willard 4 · 4⤊ 0⤋
I love the hitler one
I got expelled and went to an alternative school and one of the teachers was always drunk and he would say weird stuff.
2007-08-22 20:21:15 · answer #4 · answered by A.k.A 2 · 3⤊ 0⤋
The stupidest thing a teacher should never ask and this comes from a top notch Teachers Training Institute..is a three word sentence.
"Do you understand?"
2007-08-15 06:02:03 · answer #5 · answered by World 3 · 5⤊ 0⤋
hmmm-I can't think of anything my teachers said or done back in my school yrs, but I'll never forget one of the dummest things I did in 5th grade; I girl who always tried to act like "Ms. perfect" had large "boobs" & I knew they were'nt real, & the teacher was gone at the time, so I walked up to find out, (I was right, she stuffed her bra with "bean-bags"!) then she chased me around the classroom, tackled me in front of the class & put on a show for everyone slapping on me & pulling my hair like a freak! I don't blame her, I should have minded my own buisness, but anyways, I wasn't happy when my teacher arrived & found out!
2007-08-15 06:19:22 · answer #6 · answered by strange-artist 7 · 1⤊ 2⤋
They are good!
One teacher said to my younger brother if he didn't settle down and stop misbehaving he would wake up dead one day!
And they get paid loads too - where's the fairness in that?
2007-08-22 05:58:46 · answer #7 · answered by ? 6 · 4⤊ 0⤋
Anybody can make mistakes, but I think your teacher needs to go back for more training!!!
2007-08-21 14:55:06 · answer #8 · answered by malcolm g 5 · 3⤊ 0⤋
"hand to hand fighting with machine guns."
"people who got A's when I did would have got 2 grades better now."
"She pulled over to the left so the tanker could fall on her bike"
(wish I could remember more)
2007-08-22 11:56:32 · answer #9 · answered by Teal R 5 · 3⤊ 0⤋
5 days detention and no hanging around after school finishes
2007-08-19 07:50:52 · answer #10 · answered by inthedark 5 · 4⤊ 0⤋
P*ssing myself laughing!! The best one I remember from school is my german teacher, who was actually german and a bit of a psycho, she used to come into the classroom and yell, "Right every von, jacket off, and I VILL HAVE SIIIILLLEEENNNCCEEE!!!!!!!!!!"
2007-08-15 05:59:47 · answer #11 · answered by Outsider 5 · 5⤊ 0⤋