Is patience something you have thats born with you or is it something thats learned?

Question

If its the latter, what are some techniques to get patience or to stop thinking about whats making you impatient?

Answer 1

Patience is really an unnatural act. We are all inherently selfish creatures. We want what we want...and we want it now. So being patient is definitely a learned act. You can never totally overcome your impatience, but I have found that "choosing" my battles helps a lot. I ALLOW myself to be impatient when the issue is REALLY important to me and not just a minor irritant. The mere act of stopping for a moment and asking myself whether this fight is really necessary often leads to the answer of, "no" it isn't. Whereas if I just jumped into insisting on my way, I would be committed before I had a chance to really think about it.

I don't know if this approach will work for you, but it has served me well over the years.

Answer 2

It's learned. Just think of a baby that is hungry. It will just scream until it is fed. There is no patience there at all. The patience has to be taught as we grow. We have to learn that things aren't always given to us when we want them.

You just need to take some deep breaths and think about something else when you become impatient. I am impatient too and this is something I have been trying to work on. Keeping myself busy with something while I wait seems to help a great deal.

Answer 3

Patience is something which must be cultivated. Use to have a problem with impatience and anger, then came across the book: "Working with Anger" by: Thubten Chodron. *It teaches all the techniques and skills needed to cultivate patience.
Patience and kindness is love in action. Impatience and anger are the opposites of patience and love. Encourage you to pick up the book: "Working With Anger"
because it teaches one how to cultivate patience. Will also share this with you - it is a working definition of patience:
"Patience is the ability to remain internally and externally calm-even in the face of harm and difficulties in life." The small $12.00 investment in the purchase of this book really helped change my life for the better.

Hope this information helps.

Answer 4

Patience is learned through practice
Patience is learned as a person matures.
Not everyone develops patience.
Your question is a good one.

There is an attitude, of knowing and being assured that what we wait for will eventually come.
We have all seen people without patience, waiting at bus stops who act nervous, impatient, casting blame, complaining, or who can't possibly wait without sucking on a cigarette. Patient people, waiting for the city bus, watch expectantly, yet without inner turmoil. Maybe they only recognize some tension as the time seems to pass slowly.

Patience with our children is formed as we have an overall plan for their discovery and their behavior.
Patience is a decision. "I am able to outlast this child's tantrum".
Patience again is formed through our attitude, making judgment and guidance to keep the child on track or focused. There is a willingness within the adult to watch and to wait and to guide as the child learns.
There is an internal ability to calm ones self in the face of tension.
There is desire, determination and ability to control ones thoughts, speech and emotions.
Think of the parent in the passenger seat as their child is learning to drive. This does not mean that the person is completely at peace internally, but it does mean that their behavior is under control (no door slamming, foot stomping, huffing and puffing and sighs, no derogatory comments, no eyes flashing with anger) Patience is the ability to maintain calmness for as long as is required.

If you want to learn patience, become a parent or a teacher or a kids' camp councilor. Yes, it does come with practice.

Answer 5

No, but it can be controlled, almost no one in the world can be patient, sooner or later they will break out. To control patience is to gain a whole new life. You have to go through a lot of waiting, experience many patience-wise obstacles. For example, your friend is gona tell you something VERY important tomorrow. You have to find some other way to occupy yourself. Maybe meditate, listen to some music. Or think of something that is more important than waiting.