2007-08-14 14:13:06 · 18 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
It's not your place to do anything ie home wreck.
If he gets a divorce without any influence from you. Fine, go ahead go after him. But while he is married, his marriage is his and his wife's business not yours!
2007-08-14 14:55:43 · answer #1 · answered by xanadu88 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Is it really that he is not happy, or is it that you are the one who isn't happy or perhaps are a little bit jealous because he is no longer available? Are you comparing what you had with him with what he has with her and perhaps looking closely for flaws?
I'm not judging you. Honest. but why would I ask that of you? Because such feelings are perfectly normal amongst divorced people, especially if thedivorce was not your idea or choice...and you were the one who were left behind. It does hurt to feel "replaced" by someone else...and it's ok to mourn that loss. It's part of the stages of healing: the shock, the denial, the anger, the barganing, and eventually the acceptance.
I'm sure that you will always have a place in your heart for this person, but the truth of the matter is his happiness or unhappiness is not really your business...and your happiness or unhappiness is none of his business. I'm sure the two of you had good reasons for ending the marriage. Even if he did leave and go back to you, do you honestly think it would work? Statistically, 2d marriage have a higher divorce rate than the first...whether it is with the same person or a different person. There's probably not a divorced person alive who hasn't fantasized about getting back together with an ex who had re-married, and then doing it "right" or "perfect" the next time out. Reality? Many couples do divorce, then reconcile, only to split up again because the issues that split them in the first place never get resolved. Sometimes walking down that same path is doing nothing but going around in circles...and keeping a person from growing and finding someone who truly is right for them.
The only thing you can do is face the fact that what you and he had is over. You need to let your heart heal, then move on and start over. It's not easy, but it can be done, and it's a lot healthier emotionally than just hanging on and not closing a door that needs to be closed.
When you start feeling down about your divorce, remember the acronym "ladies" that was coined by actor Michael Landon's first wife who started a support group for Hollywood ex-spouses several years after he left her for someone else:
Life After Divorce Is Eventually Sane.
2007-08-14 14:22:11 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
Sorry to say it, but that ship has sailed. You let him go, he moved on. If he decides to leave his new wife, it should be his decision alone. You cant interfer, unless you want to be blamed for a marriage break up. You shouldnt have let him go when you had him if you still love him. Are you sure you still love him, or is it just because you cant have him anymore?
2007-08-14 14:38:21 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Walk away. Married is married. He needs to work out things in his marriage without you in the middle of it. If he decides to leave the marriage, then you can get involved with him again after the divorce. In the meantime, leave him and his wife alone.
2007-08-14 14:25:35 · answer #4 · answered by Trivial One 7 · 3⤊ 0⤋
As hard as it may be, just completely leave him alone. He is not available because he is married.
If that marriage does not work out, and you are both still single, then you can get in touch with him.
.
2007-08-14 15:53:17 · answer #5 · answered by SE 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Who cares if he's happy or not? He made his own decision to get married and that has nothing to do with you. If he is unhappy, then he has to take the action to change it.
You are not his savior and you are not the only one who "understands him."
Personally, I think he's shown you some pretty immature, needy behavior. Quit being his doormat and tell him to handle his own life.
2007-08-14 14:19:59 · answer #6 · answered by Answer Queen 3 · 3⤊ 0⤋
He's married. Leave him alone. Just remember all the reasons why he is your ex. That should help.
2007-08-14 15:55:16 · answer #7 · answered by old beatnik 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Walk away, he's your ex. If you try and help it'll look like you are "the other woman" or something like that. If he chooses to leave his new wife it needs to be his decision and you need to steer clear until it is finalized.
2007-08-14 14:43:46 · answer #8 · answered by Kitikat 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
If he wasnt happy in the first place he shouldnt of gotten married.
2007-08-14 14:28:43 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
ummmm yea I strongly suggest you let him come to you and let him make the decision to end it with his wife on his own..don't be a homewrecker and end his brand hew marriage..after all if he was that unhappy he would have ended it already and wouldn't have gone through with the marriage in the first place
2007-08-14 14:20:29 · answer #10 · answered by LONG ISLAND GIRL 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋