ok so i am going out with this girl now and things are going ok and weve been going out for like a month. well now an old friend of mine i always like but havent seen in 2 years meets me at my godfathers house sunday. now we are not related at all so remember that. and we have always like eachother but after 2 years and both of us growing up a bit i feel much more attracted to her than my girlfriend. what should i do? i like this girl a ton more and im sure she likes me. would it be wrong to see if something could work between us cause she lives a little ways away (45 min or so) and im not sure if we could make it work. what do i do?
2007-08-14 07:53:36 · 38 answers · asked by man behind the mask 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
The question is NOT "Should I feel guilty?" but "What should I do?"
It is silly to stay stuck in a relationship when you are free and young and should be experiencing as many as you can in order to make a good choice later. Your suffering is totally for nothing. Let the girlfriend go as your head is obviously elsewhere.
2007-08-14 07:58:11 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
It seems that for some reason you and this other girl were thrown together again...could be fate. I think that you should go for it because I would bet that you would always wonder what COULD have been with your old friend. I don't think that a month is really very long, so maybe you could tell the girl that you are with now that you need a break from things, then see what happens with the old friend. I had a situation like this once, and although it didn't work out with the person who came back into my life, I am glad that I took the chance to see because I would have always wondered. Once I was with him, though, I realized that he simply wasn't the one. But I have never regretted finding out because I would rather know that it wouldn't work than put that person up on a pedestal and always think that he would have been Mr. Perfect in my life. At least there are no regrets.
2007-08-14 08:02:41 · answer #2 · answered by lilprincess029 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well how old are you? do you have a car? can u drive? if so then 45 minutes isn't much.. my bf lives 45 minutes away and i see him 3 days a week and it works out alright.
Don't pursue something until you've ended things with your girlfriend, it would be wrong, even if u have to tell your girlfriend "you need some time".. then figure things out, that would be better than trying to get some other girl and THEN dumping her if it works out, and do not cheat!
Obviously your girlfriend isn't the one anyways or you wouldn't be having an attraction like this to another girl and you wouldn't be interested in pursuing it, but irreguardless, she has feelings and you shouldn't hurt her, if u break up though.. take ur time with the other girl, dont' just jump into it.. u dont' want to regret losing ur gf or anything, and you don't want to end up wishing u could have her back, and she'd be more likely to take you back if you didn't just break up with her for another girl and just so "happened" to find someone else.. i don't know if that makes sense.
Put it this way.. I'd be angry if i were ur gf and u dumped me to go out with another girl, and things didn't work out so u came back to me, but i'd be less angry if u broke up with me and then a month later ended up with someone else, and then told me things didn't work out.. I hope that clarifies it a bit.
Well good luck with your decision!
2007-08-14 08:05:54 · answer #3 · answered by lilchikka2005 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think that you should try it with this girl since it's been 2 years and you still feel attracted to her. the distance shouldn't be a problem if you guys really like each other. first off, I think you should get a solid knowledge of whether she really likes you or not. then i think you should either talk to your current girlfriend about it or break up. or you could change your relationship to an "open relationship." you like this new girl more than your gf which means you shouldn't really be keeping her around - it sounds to me like you're keeping her as the 'rebound' girl. when you have a gf she should be the person you like the most and no one else can compare to her.
so yeah go for it. but make sure you end things with your current gf on a good note.
2007-08-14 07:59:17 · answer #4 · answered by Besch 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Guilty no. You haven't done anything yet. No one can determine or control the feelings and attractions they have towards another person. Ask you self this. If you don't give it a try, 5 or 10 yrs from now are you going to wonder and ask yourself " what if". You are already questioning the relationship you are in obviously it is not that serious. If it doesn't work out then at least you know and you can move on.
2007-08-14 08:02:45 · answer #5 · answered by Ale.SP 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You shouldn't feel guilty for changing the way you feel. That happens! The best thing to do is to break it off with your girlfriend. If you no longer feels the same (and is thinking about someone else), you owe her the truth. Dragging it out and letting her find out later will only hurt her more.
If you like this other girl, go for it. 45 minutes away isn't far (at least not by L.A. standards...) You will never forgive yourself if you let this chance pass you by. If you are staying with your present gf out of guilt, you will just end up hating her for being your "obstacle".
2007-08-14 08:01:35 · answer #6 · answered by Benji's Mommy 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Damn.
I find myself also in the same situation.
Well, if you want to be like me, be open to the other girl and see how much you really can find within eachother. If you find a real connection and see that it truely is love, call it off with your girlfriend.
But in the mean time, see how the other girl reacts to your forwardness first, and if she even likes you. Afterwards, you can asess your situation better. You don't want to hurt your current girlfriend by dumping her just for a 1 day fling which didn't work out.
2007-08-14 07:59:57 · answer #7 · answered by Jack 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is completely NOT FAIR to your poor girlfriend. I know you like the other girl "a ton more" but the only reason you feel this way is becuase you like this other girl alot in the past and maybe didnt think it would work and all of a sudden se is interested? How would you feel if your girlfiend dropped you? Please have a serious discussion with your girlfiend. I ams ure you really love her and do not want to hurt her, right? This other girl mayhave to wait untill you can truthfully figure things out with your girlfriend.
2007-08-14 07:58:35 · answer #8 · answered by Confused but hopeful 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Stay with ur g/f for now. Hang out w/ ur friend get to know her a lil better. If things after decent amount of time seem like ur friend would be a better partner than ur present g/f well then dump the g/f n go out w/ ur friend. If the girl is worth it, u can make it work
2007-08-14 08:04:30 · answer #9 · answered by Sick of F*ckwits 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Since you feel that this other person may be better for you than your current g/f you owe it to all of you to respectfully break up with your g/f and pursue this other girl. Keep in mind that your g/f is not a consolation prize so if it doesn't work out there is no going back.
2007-08-14 08:09:20 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋