my boyfriend's buddies?

Question

my boyfriend's friends doesn't like me, everytime we go to his friend's house or his friends has parties, i feel really awkward and out of place.. they don't like me, even my boyfriend told me so.. they don't talk to me, they keep quiet when i'm near..
they are mostly boys so how could they act in such manner that only girls do.. i just can't believe it.
i feel really sad though, i'm trying my best to reach out like talk to them, joking around them..but everytime i start a conversation they're trying to avoid me.. they walk away.. they don't like me for my boyfriend.. may be because i don't drink and i don't have that "one of the boys" attitude that my boyfriend's ex- girlfriends are . but still, i can manage to talk and joke around them even if i don't sit down and drink with them..but too bad they judge me just like that.. they are so mean.

Answer 1

Don't worry about them. Perhaps you are trying "too hard" to fit in. Stop reaching out too much. I don't understand that attitude either. If you choose not to drink, its none of their business. Good for you.

Answer 2

Honestly, if I were you, I wouldn't stress so much. Maybe they act that way towards you because they know that their buddy truly cares about you and are somewhat worried that you might be taking him away from them. You've done your best to be kind and courteous to them, but it's their move now. If they want to treat you like crap, then it's their loss. Don't try too hard to become "one of the guys" because you should just be trying to be the "girlfriend". You should be there for your boyfriend, not his friends. Don't take it too personally because they can't judge you as a person if they never even took the time to get to know you. If you still feel really hurt about it, talk to your boyfriend about it. Tell him how you feel. If he cares about you, he'll back you up and tell them to give you a chance, but if he takes their side, maybe it's time to find a new boyfriend.

Answer 3

the actual question right it fairly is, why could asserting no reason project? it incredibly is the place your project must be. ideally you 2 ought to have the potential to talk approximately what your barriers are, the type you think of it ought to influence your relationship, and any reservations you have relating to the whole escapade. yet at a minimum, now that he's positioned the belief obtainable, he must be permitting you the area to come back to your guy or woman conclusions approximately what you like. If he's not doing that, if he's making use of any actual tension, no longer basically could or no longer it incredibly is greater useful to no longer try this, although you may desire to to reassess your complete relationship, no remember how plenty you adore him. As for the belief of the foursome itself, in case you have no particular project- ie. in the adventure that your basically project is that it ought to wreck your relationship because of the fact each from time to time that occurs, properly, something ought to probably injury a relationship. If the belief of the intercourse sounds exciting and you do not have a particular reason to think of it incredibly is going to wreck what you have now, it incredibly is probable no longer a foul concept. it ought to all pass sideways because of the fact no longer something that intimate comes devoid of probability, yet attempt to no longer permit the fairly low odds of a foul result make you turn removed from something in case you think of it includes extreme odds of being an incredible time.

Answer 4

Although you do not mention any ages, they are certainly immature... and breaking the law if they are drinking and underage. You are wise not to drink with them.

Your boyfriend also does not seem to be much of a "gem" .... in my humble opinion. He tells you outright that his friends don't like you? How considerate of him! And yet he associates with them still? And he doesn't even say to them, "C'mon guys... be nice to Coco... she's really nice... give her a chance." Or, "Hey, don't say that mean thing to Coco... she hasn't done anything to deserve that!"

Frankly, my dear, you deserve better... better treatment from the friends, AND better treatment from your boyfriend. The only alternatives is that you don't hang out with the friends, but that will cut the BF off from "his" friends... or that your BF stop hanging with his "buds." Neither of these alternatives seems to be workable.

You're young, dear... don't hang your star to this guy, there will be someone who will devote himself to you and be even willing to give up his "rude" friends for your sake, because you are MORE important to him then they are.

Just recently I was talking to the local UPS delivery guy, and he was telling me that there's a lady on his route who is 103 years old... yep.. 103 years old... but the MOST surprising thing is that... she got married at age 75!!!! So, there's ALWAYS Hope for you, dear!

Have a great day!

Answer 5

I had the same problem. They badmouthed me for no reason. Some of them really despised me. And I had never met 98% percent of them. I just stuck it out and eventually they got to where they all consider me a friend as well.

If you feel like being bold, you are in a situation that where its pretty obvious that they are ignoring you or being mean, ask them pointblank "What is your problem? Have I done something to piss you off? Because I don't like being treated this way when I don't know I could have done to offend you." That will call attention to it. They may just be doing it because they liked his ex and feel subconsiously like you caused their breakup or are keeping her away. Either way it sucks. Maybe by calling them out on it, they will realize they have no reason to be jerks to you.

Good luck, because its hard and it does suck!

Answer 6

Hard to tell what your question is . . .
I am going to guess that they don't like you for some reason, and the reason may have nothing to do with you yourself.
Examples: maybe he "acts different" when you are around, or maybe he has "decided not to do that anymore" when they suggest somehting that used to be fun and enjoyable together, or maybe he blames you (without ever telling you) for things that are really his own decision, "Yeah I don't drink any more because XXXX doesn't like it when I do."
Or maybe you have friends too and yo have told your friends some things about his friends that has gotten back to them (even though they said they wouldn't tell).

Or the opposite: especially if you are attractive, is that they don't want anyone to know that they like you too.

I am just brainstormig ideas here.

Answer 7

its ok but to be honest hes not the right guy for you. my ex boyfriends friends were the same way. no matter what i did they wouldnt give me a chance, my ex would side with them and if elty like crap bc i couldnt make peopel like me. in the end i realized my man should have my back 100% and bridge the gap which is wasnt doing and ur man isnt doing too. so either accept it or move on and find someone else.

Answer 8

It's a sad truism that as you go through life you will meet some people who just don't like you for no good reason

Answer 9

This is really common. They probably resent that he is spending less time with them and more time with you.

Mostly, they need to grow up. Your boyfriend needs to grow up a bit too. If they make you feel uncomfortable, then don't spend time with them. If your boyfriend wants you to spend time with him and his friends, then he needs to work harder to make it a comfortable experience.

Answer 10

shitheads.........i would get out of that situation all together even if thta means breaking up with the bf.....sounds like he doesn't give a crap about you......if my bf told me "oh yeah, my firends don't really like you" i would be so hurt......where's the love???? this is stupid