i like her just not her kid.?

Question

ive just started dating this girl and she has a kid witch im ok with but the kid is a little asshole hes 2 and he spits in her face and laughs and she doesnt do anything about it so i told her to spank him and she just gave him a little love tap and he laughed at her again.i like her but the kid is getting under my skin and i just want to throgh him through the window (figureativly speaking) and no I havnt talked to her about this cause its not my place to tell her how to raise her kid but if something doesnt happen soon im going to leave.

Answer 1

Spoken by a true single man! WTF?!
You are UPSET and ANGRY with a baby!
It's a baby!!!!!!!!
You need to grow up and respect this little boy.
He is his mother's love and you are just there for the time being. It's obvious - YOU are not mature enough to be with this woman or any women with children.
Just because you are annoyed doesn't give you the right to tell this woman to spank her kid!
****** YOU!

Answer 2

Something you need to understand, is that the kid is two. Most kids are utterly terrible from ages 2-3. He'll grow out of it. As far as her skills go, you can't just tell her what to do and expect it to happen. You know? It's hard to change how you do something that's serious just over night. So if I were you, I'd try and take things in my own hands. Attempt to get closer to the kid, make friends with him, and just do what you think a parent should do, provided it's acceptable by society and such. And I think over time, things will start to work out and the kid really will get better. It's not like you have to raise him, but if it really bothers you, you could help a little bit here and there. Plus, if you really, sincerely liked this girl - you wouldn't give up so quickly. It's not easy being a single mom, you know. Just be understanding, and try and help.

Answer 3

i was in the same situation a year ago...and this girl and a daughter that would never listen, through temper tantrums, scream, say shut up, your stupid....things like that it was hard in the beginning because your right where do you draw the line and say things regarding the parenting aspect. As we continued dating the daughter was around me more, was over at my place and i talked with her mom that if she acted out or was hitting at me or something i would take an active role and she would need to start some consistency in discipline. As her daughter was more comfortable with me things improved i think kids that age dont get the attention when someone else is around so they do those things to put the attention back on them

but remember you just started dating this girl....it may take time...if you see possibilites with her then give it a chance. maybe have date nights out without the child get a babysitter, and when a situation arises talk with her about you at least reinforcing what is appropriate and what behavior will not be tolarated...gl.

Answer 4

Any mother that would put her children behind you is not worthy of being called a mother. Sounds harsh.... yes, but her children should come first no matter what she feels for you. If you are going to make this work then you will have to come to a reasonable agreement on how the children should be raised and yes this may mean that you leave the parenting to her and just ride out the terrible two's! Being a step parent is an incredibly hard and thankless job sometimes but it's all worth it that one time they come and hug you and you see in their smiling little faces that they're glad you are part of your life!

Good Luck!

Answer 5

If you feel that way then you feel that way. But when it comes to your significant other having kids, its a package deal. You love her your going to love the child. Besides your being a little overreactive, the child is 2 yrs old, they call it the terrible 2's for a reason. The child will come first in her life so you need to be cognizant of that... If you are not able to deal with that then you need to let her go. But if you can work around it then you will have an amazing relationship. Talk about it with her and go from there.

Good Luck

Answer 6

Unfortunately her kid is always gonna be there and if she doesn't do anything about it now it will only get worse. You have to like both of them cuz their like a package they come together. Did u ever think maybe she has had no discipline in her life so its hard to give her kid some? Look to me like she has no control at all, u don't need someone like that. Most of these women look for a father figure for their child because they can't do it by themselves. I feel they should've thought about that before opening their legs. But if u really like her talk to her and explain how u feel maybe it will be different if not get out while u still have time.

Answer 7

Your right you can't tell her how to raise her kid, but if you plan on having a future together, you need to be able to tell her how you feel. Especially before you let it get between you two. Talk to her, not to tellher how to raise her kid, but to let her know how it makes you feel when she gets treated that way. You're in a sticky situation, but if you go about the right way it could get cleared up. 2year olds are a handful so remember, he's not the name you called him. He's two. This is the stage where they will astart to do things and it's up to the parents to teach them right from wrong and iif he's not being taught that spitting in someone's face is wrong, it's not his fault. The Mom needs to teach him that. It will take more than one time of disaplining him for him to learn . Be prepared for him to start doing it more once he's corrected the first time. Make sure when you talk to her, you don't keep dissing the kid. She'll tell you to leave,I would. Maybe she's not sure how to ghandle those kinds of situations.

Answer 8

I know how that is I was dating when my boy was 2 and he was mean to me like that. My boyfriend at the time did not like what was going on. I realize that I needed to stop my kid from doing this or he will never grow up.

Basically what i'm saying is maybe you should just say how you feel. If she gets mad at you then apparantly she never really wanted you in the first place. Some times woman think they are punishing the kids when really you do have to get a little tough with them to make them listen. If she continues to let him do this, he will do it his whole life and see that she will do anything he wants.

Answer 9

Well you should be able to tell her because every kid needs discipline that's how I was raised. It sounds like that kid needs a little respect for his mother. Talk to her about that tell her how you were raised( just don't say it rudely or your relationship could end pretty soon) just try it the little brat might need a spanking but don't do it unless she says yes! Good luck!!!!

Answer 10

People do not change and if they do it takes a lot of hard work and time. She will probably not change her parenting style for you. Imagine if you two were to have kids together in the future it wouldn't work out because your parenting styles are so different. If you are in love and so is she you could possibly try talking to her about it but if you are just saying you like this person don't even bother. There are plenty of fish in the sea.

Answer 11

It's called "Communication" if you can't tell her how you feel, about the situation, then you need therapy. Any relationship, must have honesty. So tell her to get a grip on that boy, because he's controling her.

Go buy her a parenting book and give it to her.
She has no idea. What she's doing. Ask her if she would put up with a dog that did not mind her. If she says yes.....You need to walk away from her and never come back.

A weak woman with a child is just waiting for someone else to do the job for her.