I'm about 3-4 weeks. He wants me to get rid of the kid, and still tells me that he still wants to keep "seeing" meaning that he wants to keep sleeping with me....I want to shut him up but I don't know how to tell him. I'm 21 and his 31...
2007-08-13 21:56:07 · 47 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
He's not worth your time. Decide what you want to do with your child and give him one last chance to be a man if you want to keep it. If he still denies it make sure you get child support from him no matter what.
2007-08-13 22:00:42 · answer #1 · answered by Temari 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Looks to me like he wants to see you not only for sex, just to make sure that you abort, so that he does not need to take any responsibility and get fine out. There are many a... s like that around and you may be unlucky to met someone like that, but well ... you are not the loser, he is. You are young and strong and the baby inside you is innocent and bare of any bad experience and is relying on you and will love you. Take it as an experiences, at least it is not so bad to have a child, even on your own. If you want to see him (the irresponsible guy), make sure that he supports you and the child, if not, just dump him and away with him. Dont let him spoil your life and your child's life. Make sure that it is your decision, because if you abort, he will dump you anyway and first of all, he wont feel the pain you feel, he wont cry, he wont feel guilty, it will be you and only YOU. It is your body and your decision, none else can decide it for you. If you keep the child, and if you want any advice (and yes, this happened to me too and I am happy, cos I made the right decision for me), be prepared, make sure that you have enough money, friends or own family around to support you. If not, you still will be able to do it. It may be tough, but children give so much strenght and happiness and are a blessing for life. You dont know yet, how much worth it is to have a child. BUT, it will change your life completely. No wrong sweet imagination. You will need to carry the responsibility for the rest of your life, financially (even if he pays support, it may not be enough) and most of all emotionally, and it may not be easy, no nights out, not really fun when the baby is crying and you dont know why, nobody you will share your inner feelings about the child growing up. But by the chance it happens you will find someone else who will share this with you and who will love you both. Just dont count on this idiot, who is the actually loser. Dont get influenced by him, cos he is only looking for a convenient f.... Stop any contact to him and you will see, how he really is. Face it and be strong. You will receive the best of your life, enjoy the pregnancy as it comes, every day of it. Enjoy your baby growing up. Stay strong and look for help when you need it. Wish you the best! After all you can congratulate yourself finding out how the biological father of your child is, before it is too late, he gets abusive to you or to your child. Being a single mother is not optimal, but looking at all the suffering kids in abusive marriages it is not the worst at all. The responsibility you take will make you stronger and happier.
2007-08-13 23:10:08 · answer #2 · answered by virgin_without_hesitation 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
get rid of him right away! he wants the fun but not the consequences, would you really want to say with someone that you know doesnt love you enough to stick with you no matter what? I cant believe a 31 year ols is acting so immaturley, maybe if he was 15 I'd understand his concerns about becoming a father but at this age he should no a bit more about how a girl gets pregnant, I'm guessing you no birth control so I suggest next time you use a condom and think about it abit more before you go jumping in to bed with someone because now you know what can happen.
you could try talking to him about the baby if you really want to make it work, but if this was just a fling then you've got to think whats best for the baby and how your going to have to tell it someday that its daddy was only using you for sex and didnt want him/her.
It's going to be hard no matter what you do but good luck with it and I'm sure whatever decision you make will be the right one.
2007-08-13 22:10:45 · answer #3 · answered by dillydream07 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
get rid of him and keep your beautiful unborn baby.. I went through the same thing 11 years ago and even had an abortion appointment set up (I was 17).. well when I realized that it didn't matter what everybody else wanted and that it was what I wanted that was important.. I canceled that appointment.. You don't need a man to raise that baby and he can make the choice to be there or not.. He seems like a slime ball.. he was old and big enough to play in the sheets so he should be old and big enough to step up to the plate.. I now have a beautiful little girl and am still with her father (mind you he was one of the ones who wanted me to have an abortion).. she is now his life.. it just took him pulling his head out of his ***... Tell him to go ahead and walk away b/c your keeping your baby.. and that he can either choose to be part of your lives or not.. but that is it and nothing he says or do will change your mind... go to my page and look at how happy my daughter has made my life--myspace.com/dillardlovestodd
2007-08-13 22:04:39 · answer #4 · answered by dillardeliza2000@verizon.net 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What is your feelings towards this? I mean do you want to have the baby? If he is already pulling away now then it doesnt look to good...He sounds very immature for a 31 yr old... At the end of the day it is up to you. Im a young mum myself, I'm 20 with another one on the way I would not change it for the world, my daughter makes my life worth living. Try to stay positive and do what you know in your heart is right... Good Luck!
2007-08-13 22:02:12 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Please!!!
Have YOU forgotten to LOVE yourself…even just a little?
At 21, you must have a mind of your own now.
Obviously your Boyfriend is irresponsible. He does not love you but only want the obvious SEX.
If on this times when he has to face his responsibilities with you, he turn his back and resort to an easy way out “abortion”, then he could not be trusted today…how sure can you be that he could be trusted tomorrow.
Don’t abort the child.
I know you love him, because you would have gotten rid of him and not writing on the web for answers.
Go to your parents. Not friends this time. If you are pregnant, they will be disappointedly mad but they LOVE you and you will just have to accept you fault of aggressiveness.
How many abortions do you need to go through with this man? I am sure SEX is good to him, never thinking of the consequences = YOU and putting your life at risk.
This early, you can see his true color, a coward not wanting to face his own doing..
WHERE IS HIS PROMISED LOVE?
Wake up before ending up dead from the abortion table.
Your Parents don’t deserve this honey, they gave you life, what right do you have not to give your own.
Should you only be delayed and not truly pregnant! THANK GOD for the second chance.
Can’t believe you have not heard of contraceptives at 21? Dumb is one thing but STUPIDITY is unacceptable!!!
BE GOOD and the BEST PARTNER is yet to come…
LOVE YOURSELF a little, dear.
PARIS716
2007-08-13 22:19:01 · answer #6 · answered by Helen 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's horrible that he could think that you would get rid of your child and then just keep having sex with him. Doesn't sound like a good guy to keep around. Keep the baby and get him out of your life. The only way to tell him is the hard way. If he doesn't care about you and the baby, which it seems like he doesn't, then don't worry too much about how nicely you put it. Find a man who loves you.
2007-08-13 22:01:17 · answer #7 · answered by mango_kiwi 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well if he's acting like this then get rid of him say you can either take the responsabilty of your child or you can stay away from me and not see your child. Say you don't want to sleep with him anymore because he should have thought about consequences of sleeping with you e.g. pregnancy. Are you actually in a relationship with this guy or just seeing him? If you have all of the means to keep your baby safe and well looked after have it =] and make him pay child support.
2007-08-13 22:01:58 · answer #8 · answered by immiemiami 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well of course he wants to keep seeing you, and yes a child would be a problem to him. As long as what you give away is "free" he will want to keep coming back, and will not like the idea of anything coming in the way of getting what he wants ,and a baby will get in the way. File a paternity suit aganist him and he will pay child support on the baby until the age age of 18. Get a good lawyer.
2007-08-13 22:05:02 · answer #9 · answered by flautumn_redhead 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
he does not have long term plans with you.
and he is only looking for someone to sleep with
at the age of 31 it might be the perfect age for him to be married and have a beautiful family.
but he will not change if this is not what he wants in the first place.
Stay strong I hope you keep the baby and alot of stong beautiful ladies raised their children alone
Yes shut him out because you are worth much more than someone treating you without any respect
2007-08-13 22:23:39 · answer #10 · answered by janice m 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋