I cant hang out with my freind anymore because her dad said i was trying to prove to him i was more responsible than him...
we went to a restuarant and we had a really nice waiter who refilled our drinks, offered us dessert very nicely, asked us how the food was, the typical nice waiter but even better
she was a really nice lady and the food was great....and when we were about to leave i noticed my freinds dad didnt leave a tip so i told him he forgot the tip and he said so they get paid enough they dont need any more of his money so i went back and left a tip with my own money...im only 14 and even i know how bad servers/waiters are paid....well when we got back to her house her dad called her into the room and told her he wants me to go home and that me and her cant hang out anymore because he said he didnt like that i was trying to prove i was more responsible than him...i wasnt though! i was just tipping a lady that deserved it because he didnt do it himself.......not fair is it?
2007-08-13 15:12:03 · 20 answers · asked by Anonymous in Society & Culture ➔ Etiquette
The father is a jerk, an insecure jerk at that. Good for you for tipping our hard working wait staff. Tell him most servers 2.14 an hour and have to make the rest up in tips. You can still be friends with the daughter, but I wouldn't want to go out with again, he is embarrassing.
2007-08-13 15:20:48 · answer #1 · answered by Glinda W 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Not everyone appreciates it when you stand up for your principles, especially if they think you have made their behaviour look bad by doing so.
Your friend's father feels embarrassed and ashamed of his inconsiderate behaviour, but is not a big enough person to admit it.
Instead, he thinks that by punishing his daughter and denying her the chance to be friends with you, he will feel better about himself.
He won't, but that is not your responsibility.
You have learned a very important lesson ~ doign what you think is right will not always make others feel friendly towards you.
It's an important thing to know, because in the future you will have harder enemies to confront than just this rather pathetic man who is desperate for his daughter to admire him.
Try not to sneak around to maintain this friendship, and do not undermine this father to his daughter. He is obviously already struggling to maintain the respect he feels he needs as her Dad, and saying anything negative about him could only cause trouble in the family.
Hold your head high, knowing you have done the right thing, and maintain your friendship through school and other places where it is permissable.
In time, the father may change his mind, or you will both find new friends.
Sometimes, doing right is hard. But it is always worth it.
Best wishes and good luck :-)
2007-08-13 17:31:29 · answer #2 · answered by thing55000 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Doesn't sound fair to me. Waitresses and waiters work hard for their money. They are not paid the same min. wage. IF you get good service you should show your appreciation by leaving a tip. Sounds like this guy is a jerk. I hope he will reconsider his crazy idea of keeping you apart...
2007-08-13 15:19:34 · answer #3 · answered by rcpaden 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You did the right thing. I think you're on your way to being a generous person. I say good job. Your friends dad's insecurity i s his business. It sucks that you and friend cant hang out, it is unfair. Perhaps he'll come around. I have little advice for dealing with him, parents are hard to manage sometimes.
2007-08-13 17:48:11 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
no - what a Sweet gesture. No matter what in life if you keep that attitude, you will thrive! Don't let Ppl question what you know is right in your heart. Even though it might not seem like it now , you probably saved yourself by losing a friend that is raised with morals like that. It would eventually bite you in the behind! Stay true to yourself.....hugggggs!
2007-08-13 15:20:46 · answer #5 · answered by hnfs73 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, it's not fair. He sounds like a cheapskate and obviously felt some guilt about you leaving the tip (good for you by the way) when he didn't. He sounds like an egotistical jerk. You are right - he is wrong.
2007-08-13 15:18:03 · answer #6 · answered by Rita 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
No, it isn't fair, but he's probably embarrassed that you pointed out his faux pas in neglecting to leave a tip. By doing so yourself, he probably feels that you made him look cheap and inconsiderate (which he is). Ignore him, and continue to see your friend as much as possible. With a father like that, she needs you around to be a good influence on her!
2007-08-13 15:20:25 · answer #7 · answered by Daisy J 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That is so stupid. Even if the dad didn't want to tip, you using your own money was polite and completely your decision NOT his. That's really dumb, I'm sorry that cost you your friendship. THAT IS NOT FAIR!
2007-08-13 18:11:19 · answer #8 · answered by blahblahblahblahblah 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it is completely unfair, and the wait staff are dependant on tips. they do not "make enough".
you showed up her father as a boor, and have been banished for it. your heart was in the right place, but you may have to kind ot cut down on the friendship.
2007-08-13 15:38:29 · answer #9 · answered by freespirit 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, not at all fair. I say you're entitled to outright call him a cheapskate.
I always tip.
Usually 20%.
(and at least a dollar or two anyhow if the bill is low)
2007-08-13 15:17:06 · answer #10 · answered by Bugmän 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋