I want to die?

Question

I'm 19, just flunked my second year in university out of boredom, I'm bored to death, I actually fantasize about dying, I mean I dont want to commit suicide or anything, I just want to die, nothing is fun anymore, I cant find joy in anything that i do or used to do, I used to play basketball and Table tennis I cant anymore. I cant watch anything more than twice, a movie, TV show,nothing. I watched season 1-6 of scrubs in 2 days thats how messed up I am. I play poker but I'm bored with gambling, I quit smoking and now I dont have any cravings, I cant get addicted to anything again, I mean how bad can it be when you dont feel like smoking anymore? seriously, I think Ive hit my absolute rock bottom, and I'm just 19. my parents dont know im out of school either, everyone thinks its all good with me, I dont even bother with anything, except the regular rent payment and the occasional getting drunk, seriously What do i do? Do i kill myself?

Answer 1

I was stuck in the same situation and i flunked Pre-med. But, after i told my parents and my mother got upset at me, she took me to another university under the nursing major, but i had to work my @ss off and show the university that i can score high so i spent a year their and received a 3.7 GPA (thanks to my mother who back me up after she yelled the crap out of me and no thanks to my father who wanted to take me out of college and have me work). I also received a scholarship and my mother was proud.
I thank my motivation/determination to make my mother happy and i think that you should have a serious talk with your parents because you still have time to go back to school and the future is still bright for you. I believe in you!!!

Answer 2

WOW this sounds familiar...all too familiar. I've been homeschooled for the past four years, besides going to public for a few classes here and there. I fell into the same miserable, seemingly hopeless hole of depression. I lost contact with all my friends, lost passion for a hobby that I was extremely good at and had invested tons of time/money in (horseback riding), my relationships with my parents began to become horrible, nothing was exciting to me anymore, it seemed nothing was worth living for, I had been a strong Christian, and I began to lose my faith too; which is the WORST thing that could possibly happen to me. Plus, my school was (is still) on the computer so I was forced to sit at a computer for hours each day, and get more bored, more depressed...All the while I denied that I had a problem whenever it was brought up. In retrospect, it's hard for me to put a finger on an exact moment where my life slowly started coming together again. But I do know that admitting to my brother last summer that I had a problem helped a ton (he had been through the same thing)...It's nice to have someone hear you AND understand you...I started praying and reading the Bible more, and getting close to God and that helped me a TON. I'm going to be a sophomore next yr. and I'm going back to public school, which will help with the boredom (sometimes depression) induced by homeschool. My life won't ever be the same as it was, but I'm actually super greatful for that...I feel like I learned so, so much coming out of that, and have such a better understanding of things-- BIG things, things that are hard to explain. What felt like the worse thing in my life had an outcome far better than I would've ever imagined. SO, to answer your question: NO, you should absolutely not kill yourself, there really is a way out of this. You should talk to someone about it, whether it be a counselor, sibling, parent...You just have to get that out, or else it will just keep eating away at you. Then look at the things in your life that you would like to change, like, if you were happy right now, what WOULD you enjoy? Go from there, just think about all of it... I don't know what to say to...I wish I did. But, I want so, so much for you to understand that there is a way out and the way out is NOT taking your own life, and the way out is closer to you than you think. Gosh, I wish I could talk to you in person right now. But I beg you to make the changes in your life you need to make... When you come out of this you're going to have some wisdom and understanding that you did not have before, and you will be greatful for it. I don't know if you believe in God, or not, but I can guarantee you that haveing the God of the universe whisper to your soul is the most beautiful thing we can experience here one Earth. "Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you." (Matthew 7:7)
Stay strong, brother. I'm pulling and praying for you.

HOLY, I just realized how long this is...sorry about that :)

Answer 3

Nah! Don't kill yourself dude! Your'e depressed, bored, and at a crossroad....one of many in our journey called life! I don't mean for it to sound so simple and hoity-toity, but I'm close to 50 now and I've hit many a crossroad. Obviously, you don't enjoy college and the classes your'e taking. What's your passion? Think back before Scrubs....Would you rather not go to school, but feel it's expected of you? Maybe you should try and find a job, not necessarily a career (your'e young) doing something you love. Are you into music, movies, animals, cars.......Maybe an antidepressent might be in order to get your spark back. Don't knock meds till you've tried em. I spent years "sleprocking" thinking I was just a negative person. Sleprock was a character on the Flintsones when I was a kid. He was always whining...Then I found out I had a chemical imbalance that needed seratonin to my brain, you know, the feel good stuff. I'm a happy camper now, but at one time I fantasized about death too. Alot. You haven't reached rock bottom, just a plateau. You need something in your life that feeds your brain. Obviously your'e feeling like your stagnating, right? We all get that way from time to time. It's kind of like your inner self is tellin' ya to stop, and go another direction. You can do it at 19, 30, 50, etc... I wish I was so "duh" that I could quit smoking and not have those crazy cravings! Consider yourself lucky on that one! So, dying is out. Listen to what you would like to do next. Nothing you choose is written in stone. Go find a passion!!!!!

Answer 4

Dieing only causes heartache for those you leave behind.

I have a 25 yrs old and a 23 yr old (in college off and on). If something happened to them I would be ruined and devistated blaming myself for not being their for them. Don't ruin the lives of your parents, siblings, and friends by taking the easy way out. It is always harder to live than die. But your soul learns nothing.

You can get trough this just like many of us did when we were your age. I almost killed myself when i was a teen and am so happy I could not do it. My life is GREAT. I have a wonderful husband, and two great grown kids, and a fun live. You can too. Things are NEVER as bad as they seem, remember that.

College is not for everyone. It can be alot of pressure for someone not committed. You may be searching for other things in life right now and that is good. If school bores you, drop out, and get a job your love. There are many job training programs now that train you to be a manager of a business making good money. You can manage a restaurant, gym, sporting goods store (Big 5 is hiring), Retail, and more.
Find what you thing you will ge good at that will not bore your intelligent mind, then go for it.

Another important thing is your health. If your health is not right you will be depressed and out of touch. It can happen real fast to adults in this fast paced world with no time to eat right. Fast food is a real killer of good health. So is smoking and drinking. If your diet is not balanced and you are missing certain vitamins and minerals and enzymes or too acidic you can have depression and symtoms like you state here. Go see a Naturopathic Doctor, Herbalist, or Holistic Doctor. They can help turn your life around without drugs. I will bet it is from your diet. That can be changed fairly fast and you will feel like a new man. If nothing else buy a good multi-vitamin with minerals, plus take Greens (miracle green, Green Vibrance, or Green Magma) and check your PH levels with test strips. Too acidic then you also need alkaline therapy (ph drops in water) and active enzymes.
I bet you will feel great in one week. Try it nothing to lose.

And yes, I care about you. So if you need someone to talk to contact me. Maybe I can help.
Sharon

Answer 5

You sound like someone who isn't satisfied just doing the normal college, career, kids type of thing. Jeez not everybody has to go to University right out of high school. Tell your parents you're taking a break. Go up to Alaska and work the fishing boats for a few years, join the peace corp., go teach people English in poor countries. You could do so much good for the world, then when you feel like it and you have some purpose or some reason for going to school and doing all that hard work, then come back and finish. If you don't want to be there, then you are just wasting yours and your parents money - DO SOMETHING ELSE!!! Sign up for Army and go get shot at for a few years, that'll make you miss college!!!

Answer 6

I've often felt suicidal, but when I think about my how my family would feel (especially the ones who care about me), I change my mind. I think you really need to see someone just to talk. Perhaps you just need to find something to believe in--to wake up for every day. I know, it's hard. Or maybe a change of scenery could help-- move somewhere else, try to find a course that really interests you at school or a job that really interests you, even if you have to start at the bottom. Or trying meeting new people. Easier said than done, I know. Once you're in a funk, it's tremendously hard to get out.

Answer 7

No maybe u dont like what ur studying at school maybe u should try to take a chance on something else other careers get a girlfriend go with friends to the mall clubs and just kick it u know go find adventure but dont kill ur self think about the people that will miss u and have plans for u and with u

Answer 8

ending your life would be a tragic mistake.

you really ought to talk to your parents. you owe them that much. it might be a good idea to move back home for now. interacting with your parents and siblings; even the family pet would be a good thing.

boredom is 'boring', but that should be the biggest problem you ever have. your entire life lies before you. this feeling will pass. try to hang in and do some volunteer work. it'll make you feel good. it'll make someone else feel good.

keep a journal.



if you feel you are suffering from depression, i would suggest you talk to a counselor or psychologist. getting at the root of your issues, if any, can be exactly what you need.

Answer 9

You can call a suicide hot line. You can seek counseling at your university. If you have a trusted relative you can confide in, please call them today. There are clinics that may assist you with medication if need be.

I think many people feel that way at certain times in their lives. Life is overwhelming, there are seemingly so many choices and at other times, seemingly few choices.

Remember, it's a passing emotional feeling. It will get better. Something inside of yourself is telling you that you may need a different path right now and part of being younger is finding the path - yet there are many. You have gifts to give the world and so many need your help. By helping others you will help yourself. Find a charity you believe in and give of yourself while you seek your own help. Never give up - it will get better!

Answer 10

You are so young, and things can change every second. Try talking to your parents about everything. This isn't the end of the road for you. You have the potential to do anything that you allow yourself to do. Sit down and think about what you want out of life and write down your goals. Speak with a close friend or trusted family member about this. Don't kill yourself. You will cause a lifetime of sadness for those who love you, especially your parents. They will understand. Just talk to them about it.