My parents are so strict. They don't allow me to date until I graduate college..?

Question

I don't know what to do. I think dating doesn't depend on age, it depends on maturity. I think I'm quite mature for my age. I'm thirteen years old. I know the issues going on with teens, like being pressured and stuff into sex. But, I know better than that. If they don't allow me to date when I'm in high school, how am I going to learn like, who's worth my time, who's not. What do I want in a guy? I've been in a serious relationship for 8 months. It was the most horrible break up ever. But, I managed to get myself through it. My parents expect me to concentrate on my grades only and they pretty much tell me I don't need friends. When my friends are the only ones that I can really talk to and solve my issues with. They make me feel better. While, my parents don't know anything that goes on in my life.

Answer 1

Once you turn 18 you can date if you want. You could tell them it is better for you to date while under their roof (not til your 15 or 16 though) so they can help guide you through mistakes. However there is no point in committing yourself to one boy as a teen because teenage boys arent really interested in relationships, they just want sex.Trust me I was a teen boy once and me and all my guy friends were like that. Boys are just not mature enough to want more than that. So if you do date as a teen keep in mind no matter how much they say I love you, its all so they can have sex with you and then they will dump you for the next girl.

Answer 2

I feel for you -- I was in the exact same case some years ago (quite a few I must say -- I am 30 now). It's really frustrating. Yes, you do need to pay attention to school, but having friends and liking guys and even going out with them is normal..... however, we also think that we know a lot of stuff at that age which we actually DON'T know.... and you don't find that out till many years later. I'm not saying that you should do what your parents want you to do, and as someone else said already, if they don't soften up I think you'll still have to do your stuff without them knowing about it..... that's life and they can't keep you at home as if you were in jail. Sometimes it's just really hard for parents to allow their kids to make their own mistakes, they think they can protect them from the evil in the world forever, but that is not true. So be very careful, but do learn things on your own..... if you parents don't understand this, you'll have to do it anyway. Just be wise ok?? And think that any thing you do (or don't do) can affect your life in the future..... good luck!

Answer 3

College? Ha! That's a laugh. I'll bet they are exaggerating. Once you hit 18, they can't do a darned thing about who you date.

That said, at 13 years old, I agree with your parents about dating. Dating is a waste of time for you at that age. You won't learn a thing, because you will be dating immature people in unrealistic sitautions. So I wouldn't even worry about that. Meanwhile, your grades ARE the most important thing in your life right now. They are the difference between success and failure in life, and that INCLUDES your future relationships. Add dating and possibly sex to this equation, and you could be ruining your life in a hurry. That is no joke.

I disagree with your parents regarding friends, however. But there is nothing they can do about that, now, can they? You have your friends at school. Enjoy them, and give it some time. The older you get, the more your folks will give in. You are at a crossroad in your life, and they know it. They are only trying to protect you. Learn how to balance them with being yourself, and you'll be fine. Dating will come in time, but sooner is not better than later. I guarantee it, because I've been there!

Answer 4

In deed this might seem like a big problem, but you might be making it bigger than what it really is. just relax and take it easy for you must earn your respect from you parents and let them know that you are mature by your actions, not by fighting with them.

Understand one thing you are Young and you have a whole life in front of you so when you get older you will have enough time for dating. Trust me you don't understand it know, but you will appreciate what your parents are doing when you grow older.

This is not a 30 or 40 year old talking to you and no I am not a parent. I am 21 and right now I enjoy my life and have the respect of my parents. so give things time and try to enjoy the time that you have right now with your parents for those days will soon go away and you will one day miss them. don't run in to things so fast for you will end up running into a wall. When the time comes you will be ready and don't give in so easily learn how to get to know people and wait until marriage for that is when you will enjoy everything.

Best wishes

El Compadre

Answer 5

Well your parents are right on one thing, you do need to concentrate on your grades. But they also need to let you live your life and be young. It's okay to date a little when your thirteen but do it in a group . I am 28 now but I remember what it;s like. I was in the same boat as you. I was allowed to group date. It's actually more fun then going just the two of you. I hope your parents lighten up a little. I can't believe I am saying this but if they don't do it anyway. just be careful.

Answer 6

You should really talk to your parents about what you just wrote....And yes you are right how are you supposed to tell if a guy is worth your time or not..And you do need friends dont let then tell you that you don't need friends..You need someone to talk to....And your parents are way out of hand with you cant date guys till you graduate from collage..When your ready to speak your mind you should really talk to them...Hope all goes well..