Is it really that big of a deal how many people you have slept with in the past?
2007-08-13 05:19:13 · 51 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Dont ask and dont tell! That will ruin it real fast. Its in the past and it needs to stay there.
2007-08-13 05:23:28 · answer #1 · answered by Jerry 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
To a current or new partner it could be a big deal. Some people will judge you for it and others couldn't give a monkeys how many people you've slept with. Thing is, all the people you've slept with in the past have basically made you the sexually experienced person you are now. You can't change it so if you for whatever reason feel ashamed then forgive yourself and move on. I'm not ashamed of my experiences but I don't go telling the world about them either as I prefer my private life to be just that.
Blessed be xx
2007-08-13 05:27:13 · answer #2 · answered by Lost and found 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The higher the number is for you, the less big of a deal it is when you talk to other people. You get more mature about that.
What is important is being healthy and disease free. If you slept with one person and got an STD, then that's a pretty big problem. Otherwise, what happened in the past should be allowed to stay in the past.
2007-08-13 05:23:23 · answer #3 · answered by BZR 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The short answer is yes, and no. Yes it matters for you, but no it shouldn't be a deal breaker if someone loves you.
The long answer is:
The reason it matters for you is that it can hurt you both physically and psychologically. If you haven't always been safe EVERY time, then you've put yourself at serious health risk (not to mention the risk you pose to partners) and that just isn't smart in this day and age.
Another factor is the self-esteem ramifications. Research shows that the higher the number of sexual partners a young woman has, the more negative impact it has on her self esteem. Think about it like this, every time you give yourself sexually to a partner it's like you give them a little piece of you. The more partners, the more of yourself you have given away...eventually, that can make someone feel pretty empty and used.
We can't erase our past, but we can react differently to future situations. Be safe, and smart. If you are currently with someone who loves you, the number shouldn't matter all that much. But human nature is such that no one wants to feel like they've had to share the person they love with the whole world. I'd try to respect your partner's feelings and if you must divulge your entire sexual history, then be prepared that your partner may feel differently about the number than you do. And, that is his/her right.
2007-08-13 05:43:01 · answer #4 · answered by Just Being Honest 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Depends on how high the number is i guess.
The number itself doesn't matter, but a really high number points to a lot of possible problems.
STDs
Relationship issues. Finding out your boyfriend has been with 30 girls in the last 3 years would probably not make many women happy. It makes it hard to believe a person is not just using you for the now, with the intetion of tossing you to the side in the near future.
Cervical and uterus cancer rates are substantially increased for women that have had more than 6 sexual partners.
2007-08-13 05:26:43 · answer #5 · answered by Bigshow 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Depends if they were one at a time or not.
If a girl tells me she has slept with 3 guys in the past 5 years then no big deal. However, if she tells me she has slept with five guys in the last 2 hours....... that's a relationship killer.
2007-08-13 05:28:52 · answer #6 · answered by lunatic 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
If someone has to ask you, then they are uncertain about your sexual promiscuity. If you assure the person that you have been well protected in the past and checked out for any diseases, then the number does not matter at all. What counts is that you would want to offer your sexuality and body to them, at this moment in time. Asking about the past only leads some people to insecurity.
2007-08-13 05:27:35 · answer #7 · answered by A man of my word 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It really shouldn't matter because it says nothing about how experienced you are. You could have sex with 5 people one time each and be less experienced than someone who has only had sex with 1 person lots of times. As long as you are having safe sex and getting tested on a regular basis the number shouldn't matter. I don't tell people I'm dating my number because it only causes arguments and is really no ones business...
2007-08-13 05:31:59 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hi..
Well, if you took precautions, didn't get or pass on any STD's, and stayed away from married men, and didn't break up any marriages..I guess what you did, should stay in the past!
Besides..why would you want to tell or brag about to anyone..how many men you slept with? Who Cares?
2007-08-13 05:38:32 · answer #9 · answered by howdoilvthee 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It can be. If you have slept with a lot of guys you are putting yourself and your future spouse at a huge risk. It doesn't matter how careful you are.
Not to mention it sends out a message that you really do not care about yourself and you are willing to sleep with anyone.
Is that how you want people to see you?
Sex should be considered a privileged gift for the right guy, not a charity case.
2007-08-13 05:25:12 · answer #10 · answered by Mom of 2 5 · 2⤊ 1⤋
It is a big deal. For me....the more people you sleep with, the worse it is for spreading STDs and such. Just be careful and exercise careful consideration if it is you we are taking about. If it is regarding someone you or another is interested in, just be safe with them. You don't want to end up with the gift that keeps on giving, even when that person may have moved on.
2007-08-13 05:27:43 · answer #11 · answered by Kim 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋