Do you have negative feelings when an Asian girl dates a white guy?

Question

I'm Asian (South Eastern) and the only guys (2) whom I've had relationships with are both Caucasian. I am attracted to them, but I do have crushed on Asian male actors. Anyway, lately I started to look at this as weird. I heard they call Asian girls who date Whites as sell-outs, and the Whites as having Asian fetish. Now I'm all paranoid and thinking that whenever I go out with my man, people have negative thoughts about us.

In all honesty, I like the person for who he is, he's sweet and thoughtful and really cares for me, and I'm not some "whitewashed" asian as I stick to my roots and proud of who I am and where I come from. My guy seems decent and has good intentions. He met my family.

Am I just being silly here?? Is it normal that I'm attracted to white guys and them to me as well? I've had some Asian guys hitting on me too, but I always somehow end up liking the white guy more.

I don't know, I just got really paranoid over this interracial dating thing.

To Fusionramjet..

I am not trying to be a racist here. I see this problem more as like one family not agreeing you to go out with the son of another family, coz they would wish you to see someone they know. You are being a big jerk you know that? Plus, not all Asians are like that. I am actually taller than some of my caucasian girl friends. And I have a butt!! Flat butts can be found in every race you ignoramus!! So stop your stereotyping and bashing about physical features. Maybe you look nothing better than what you've described and putting down people makes you feel better.

And like I said, I am not ashamed of being Asian. I was thinking about the "sell-out" and "asian-fetish" negative labels couples like us seem to get... and I think I know why, it's from people like you... EXACTLY!!!

Answer 1

If the problem is that bad, why don't you just date a guy who is half Asian and half White (BUT looks white if that's what you like)?. So if someone calls you a sell-out, you can tell him that your boyfriend is half Asian.

Answer 2

I'm an Asian guy and I really don't have a problem with it. Just as long as they treat the lady right. People need to stop living in the past and move on. "out with the old in with the new" The only race that should exist is human race and color and different backgrounds should not matter. I keep hearing about the Asian women with white guys issues and it's getting old. I mean people need to stop stressing because you can't stop it. Even with all those ridiculous stereotypes, come on that's totally unnecessary. Also don't worry about the people who act like a bunch a kids on this thing. It is to be expected and no offense if your a youngster yourself. But just ignore, move on, their nothing, come and go. If your hot, your hot and if others are interested in your Asian flava then that's up to you to reciprocate back. Hope this helps.

Answer 3

I"m a Chinese male that is from an actual Asian Heritage background, and speak Mandarin. I probably disagree with the stereotypes that Asian men have against any other race (there is none) but people speculate they have them. I totally dig black chicks, doesn't matter what religion, as long as they are a good person.

Answer 4

Not sure where you heard all that but I don't find an asian person with a white person weird at all. Maybe the asian community considers you "sell-outs" for some reason and i don't see how dating a asian means they have a fetish....

If your fine with it thats all that matters and I doubt your going to get thought about badly by strangers.

Answer 5

No negative feelings here! If I were to tell you not to date whites, then I would have to tell my own sister not to date whites (she only dates white guys). Do whatever makes you happy. It's your life, only you can live it... why be miserable because someone else doesn't like what your doing.

I noticed that many asians often care too much what other people think. Do what you think is right, it doesn't matter what they think! Only you will live with the consequences of your decissions. What you really want to avoid is living with the concequences of someone else's decission! If never do things that you'll regret in during your life, your life will be very happy.

Answer 6

Why feeling negatives? My boyfriend is Caucasian, and I have no problem with going out with him in the public...I really don't care what other people think of me, I mean why you have care about what other people think about you? Asian fetish or not, does it really matter? You're not living your life in other people standards or happiness. If you feel very parnaoid over your interracial dating with your love one, then you should leave him alone, let him find someone who is really loves, and cares for him, not someone just worry about how other strangers think about how she going to do to him behind the close doors. Life is too short for worry this type silly thing like this.

Answer 7

Why? If you like white guys then you shouldn't give a $hit what others think about your racial preferences. I happen to like Latinas and Asians more than Black girls, is that now a problem too? I mean its 2007, get over it people, interracial dating has become more mainstream than same race dating. Keep up the good work.

Answer 8

Asian guys don't care, unless you or your white bf start spouting negative stereotype of Asians

Answer 9

Not at all my wife is asian and she had only dated white guys before me. Not a big deal at all.

Answer 10

Don't worry about what other people think about your relationship, they're probably just jealous! Race doesn't matter at all in a relationship; love, honesty, trust, and all the other good stuff matters. &hearts