Well after 7 years of marriage, I finally got my inlaws video of my wedding which I had never seen! Well, on the video my hubby's uncle was the cameraman. He was "interviewing" friends and family before the wedding and asking if they had any words of advice for us... all my family and friends said things like "congratulations!" and "I'm so happy for you!" ; words of encouragement. Whenever someone on hubby's side was asked, there was always some response like "RUN now" or "it's not too late to back out now!" like in a joking( but maybe serious undertone ) manner. Even my sis in law when asked if she had anything to say to us she said "not anything I can say on camera"
How should I feel about this? I always felt like they didn't like me ; patronize me but talk about me behind my back, and hubby tries to reassure me or protect me, but now what should I think about this?
2007-08-12 12:46:35 · 20 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
they can get over it, you've married him! and hes happy!
2007-08-12 12:53:05 · answer #1 · answered by rusty71987 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Wow! how obnoxious! So sorry you have to deal with that. I'm normally really mellow, but if I were in your position I would be livid!
Has your husband seen the video? What does he have to say about it? I really think that you need to have a good talk with him about it and let him know exactly how you feel. He should probably talk to his family. At the very least, they owe you an apology for saying unkind things on *your wedding video*!! Had they just said these things behind your back...well, that would definitely suck. But they said these things on your wedding video!! ...for some reason that just really strikes a raw nerve. Not ok! They definitely need to be made aware that their behavior was not appropriate. Whether you or your husband is the one to say so is something the two of you will have to work out.
good luck.
Why on earth did it take 7 years to get the video?? Did they not want you to know that they behaved like jack@$$es?
2007-08-12 16:52:25 · answer #2 · answered by SE 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, a lot can change in 7 years. Maybe they do like you now but weren't so sure back then. I would hope that after 7 years if there weren't any major problems it's a mute point. I wouldn't make a big deal out of it. Yeah, that wasn't very nice of them, even if they were joking, but it can't be changed now. Put the tape away and never look at it again. It doesn't matter what they think now or thought then, it matters how happy you and your husband are today. good luck
2007-08-12 13:05:38 · answer #3 · answered by az 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No one can tell you what you should think. But I will say that all that matters is you and your husband. If HE said those things then you could worry. It sounds like you are different from that family and perhaps they dont like you. I dont know. But just be gracious when you are stuck with them which hopefully will not be often. Just focus on your husband and having a good marriage. Im sure he wants to smooth things over and not have a fight about it but I definitely sympathize with you. I have heard those jokes. too. The fact that it took 7 years to receive the video is quite interesting. There is really little you can do except rise above it and spend your time with people you like.
2007-08-12 16:26:08 · answer #4 · answered by barthebear 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
People get drunk and say all sorts of things that seem hiarious at the time but aren't so funny after the buzz wears off. That's half of why America's Funnies Videos has stuff to show.
You inlaws probably realized that the joke went a little too far and thats why they kept it. Its like my last name. I'm an artist and my last name right now is Poupart. So everybody thinks they are so cute and orginal when they go "Oh! Do you do your art with poop? Get it Poop Art hahahahah" I could easily fill up a video with it. They probably didn't mean it seriously and even if they did who cares because you are proving them wrong every day!
2007-08-12 12:54:23 · answer #5 · answered by pspoptart 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am assuming that someone did not want you to see this video, knowing what was on it, and it was hidden in someone's attic or basement or just conveniently never available for the past several years.
OK . . so parts of this video confirmed your fears about your husband's family thoughts about you.
So rise above it . . and move on with your life. Showing them that you are a better person is your best revenge.
Answered by: A Certified wedding specialist / A Professional bridal consultant / A Wedding ceremony officiant
2007-08-13 09:33:03 · answer #6 · answered by Avis B 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If I was in your shoes I would be angry and I think you have the right to be. Don't hold a grudge though. You and your husband are your own family now - regardless of what anyone else has to say. And the fact that you've been together for 7 years says a lot. Be angry, but then let it go and just be thankful that you found your husband.
2007-08-13 05:05:59 · answer #7 · answered by VAWeddingSpecialist 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My future sister-in-law said some very sarcastic and rude comments on my video. I'm not sure why "Congrats" wasn't good enough but I guess once she had a few drinks in her it was going to be anything but kind. It upsets me but what could I do. You've been married for 7 years. That's all that matters. Move on.
2007-08-12 16:05:35 · answer #8 · answered by Luv2Answer 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This was seven years ago!
I'd just let it go, yeah be pissed, but don't react to it.
After 7 years of marriage they probably changed their minds.
Considering you've never had a glimpse they felt like this before (I assume), my guess is they were only kidding.
You can always see if someone can edit out the 'jokes'.
2007-08-12 13:22:31 · answer #9 · answered by Terri 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would be incredibly offended if people were drunk BEFORE my wedding.
But otherwise, I would probably feel apprehensive about it all...but you have made it seven years just fine, so don't worry too much about it. You've clearly proven yourself to not be horrible for him, and they should see that. Maybe his family is just like that, some people always joke around like that. Perhaps what was said on the video was some sort of inside joke between him and members of his family.
2007-08-12 13:04:06 · answer #10 · answered by Jamie C 2 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Offended? Yes.
But in reality, hurt? No.
Tell you something, going 7 years with him, knowing there was rough patches with that type of family.........you pretty much are getting the last laugh.
So, *clasps* for making it work 7 years (and counting) and set it aside as a past situation that means less than what today holds.
2007-08-12 13:06:42 · answer #11 · answered by Mutchkin 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋