Relationships are like black holes, need advice?

Question

I have a problem..... My girlfriend and I have been dating for 7 months now. It's iffy like most relationships. Well last night we were talking and we came across a question that I did not want to talk about, only because I was fearful that the answer to this question would send the relationship into a breakup. If you had information that if shared COULD either end your relationship, or help it and answer a lot of questions, but the outcome is unsure what you you do?

I just want to add that I really love this girl, and I do not want to lose her.

Answer 1

If u don't want to loose her, and aren't sure of her reaction, then don't share the info. Just give it to her in doses, or tell her u read it somewhere or something. Honesty isn't always(more often not) the best policy.

Answer 2

If you really care about this young lady and she cares about you, honesty has to be the best policy for all times. That's why comunication in a relationship is of the utmost. You do have the option to weigh what you should and should not say to her. If you think it's too soon in the relationship to dispell some of the things you think might hurt the relationship - tell her that...be honest - There is no way to tell if 4 years into the relationship you tell her - and she walks - or 4 weeks. People are really funny about truths. They 'say' they want you to be honest, but then when you are - they run.

Case in point - an associate of mine dated a lady for 3 years. When he felt comfortable about revealing some really personal things about himself, he thought this was a good time to open up on this subject. He was shocked when after he began to tell her - she threw up her hands and said she didn't want to hear anymore. She left him - just like that! Of course, he was devastated, but he later learned that in spite of his hurt - it would not have mattered 'when' he told her - she was unable to deal with the information - and that was a defect on 'her' part - not his. Personally, I probably would not wait 'that' long....but people will be people - and you have to say that if the love was lost as a result of that - it was not yours to love in the first place.

Answer 3

I dont have an answer for u but i hope this helps a little.
I tell the truth about stuff no matter what and up until my present relationship its been working out well. My present 1 how ever holds the truth against me all the time. Sometimes i wished i would have "fudged" it a little. I know he has straight out lied about somethings in his past. even though he says he has not (and i dont have proof either way) but think about this.....what do u think is going to happen when i find out (and i will eventually) that he lied about something in his past????I can tell u it wont be pretty and if he would have just told the TRUTH in the fist place like I did ...everything would be cool

Answer 4

It depends what the answer is. If the answer would be about your sexual preference or about having had an affair, or anything that makes you live untruthfully, I would say it should be out in the open. I haven't been in a long term relationship, so I might not be the best person for a good answer. hope this helps

Answer 5

Awww man, don't take you relationship there. If it's already going there and it's only been 7 months, dude end it! Spare her and yourself the agony. Why even get into conversations like that. Focus on NOW and enjoy what you have. Not on other bs. It's a waste of time.

Answer 6

BE HONEST!.. a realtionship can;t be built on secrets. Make sure you show her that you really love her and respect this relationship enough to tell her the truth. If she feels the same about you then she will find it easier to accept whatever it is you have to tell her. She will be happy yu told her the truth.

Answer 7

Relationships are based on trust and I - like many people, I'm sure - recently saw a side of someone that ended things right then. If it is a question based on anything but facts don't ask it.

Answer 8

ok so at the start if it grew to become into me i could tell her what it somewhat is doing to you and the shown fact which you're heavily thinking breaking it off along with her. ok and that i'm not gonna misinform you yet do not you think of that months at a time is suspicious? I recommend if it grew to become into me i could circulate to her house and spot the place she is going. That sounds stalkerish yet provide me a spoil it is the female your gonna spend the the remainder of your existence with chum. How do you comprehend she isn't with yet another guy. No regularly occurring guy or woman is going Months without speaking to somebody they'll marry. Thats purely ludicrous. 2, and that i say this to not make you sense undesirable or be-fee you yet, you are able to desire to guy up. If she is doing this "just to be on precise of you" as you place it then you definately choose evaluate your situation my chum. that's not the movements of a woman that loves and respects you. in case you're treating her with love and making her sense like she is significant than there is not extra to be reported. And as far as your loved ones is going. enable them to renowned whats occurring. Say hiya seem it is my situation and it is what i'm questioning approximately doing. What do you think of. That way in case you p.c. to circulate away her and it will become a he reported she reported your loved ones is familiar with precisely whats occurring. it would desire to be problematical. yet while your loved ones cares approximately you they'd desire to not desire a woman to tackle you that way.

Answer 9

Whats the answer that would make or brake the relationship....damn it must be really bad if you dont want to tell us. I dont know this question is too vague.

Answer 10

This is impossible to answer without knowing the details, but at 7 months, you don't need to know all of each others secrets.

That said, don't ever out right lie about anything.