what punishment fit the crime? what punishment is to harsh?

Question

I have a friend that has tried many punishments with her 14 year old daughter. Well she began to try alternate methods because everything else wasnt working. Well she found out her daughter she spanked her younger brother so she pulled her over her knea and spanked her. she make quite a scene. through a fit like a 3 year old afterwards. My friend said she was acting like a baby and she would be punsihed as such if she did it again. she told her she wouldnt dare. Well her son has had bed wetting problems and her daughter started to pick on him and spanked him for it when she wasn't there. well sure enough she took her over her knea again and she through a fit like 3 year old again. she told her i warned you and pulled out diapers. she diapered her and she spent the weekend around the house in a diaper and t-shirt. needless to say she never spanked her brother again or picked on him.

honestly people. diaper fetish and troll post? sick. well everyone has there own opinion. i am simple telling what had happend i wanted to get peoples take on it. i would of stopped at spanking. even spanking as a parent myself if you do it should stop at a certain age. it wasnt the force should she used though. ive seen this 14 year old throw her stuff and get her way. again she "acted" liked a 3 year old. laying on tthe floor kicking and screaming. even the oldest kids act childish.

Well she asked her to lay down when she pulled out the diapers. she is 14 so i can understand privacy dont know if that makes a difference. and she had never spanked her before until them incidents. she had tried grounding before and taking away stuff. all that other stuff.

Answer 1

diapered and spanked a 14 year old? Really, if this is true, I am a liberal :)

If this is true, please find other methods, this child is going to have SERIOUS issues if she's made to wear diapers, for humiliation purposes.

Answer 2

Humiliation no matter what should NEVER be a form of punishment.
My son is 5 and he's in pull ups at night. I had this problem and honestly you don't see any adults that have the problem. Dr.s say that between 3 to 5 they may stop and if they don't it may stop before puberty.
Sounds like your friend needs to sit down with her daughter and explain that she's the mom therefor the daughter better not ever punish her little brother again. At the age of 14 she must love to hang out with her friends, she must get an allowance.
To me a form of punishment to her would be to take things away. I know this does not work for all children but it's a start.
I honestly don't believe that spanking is a cure all because sometimes it teaches your child that it's OK that an adult hits but not a child... But sometimes there is just no other way. I do have 3 children and I've spanked 2 of them since my baby is only 2... But first I try other methods and they seem to work the best for my children.

Answer 3

The problem with punishing a 14 year old is that if one hasn't established ground rules well before now, very little is going to have any impact on a person this close to adulthood.Spanking them is likely to look ridiculous because by age 14 we don't represent much of a physical threat to our children by then. (Don't get me wrong, I can still take them, but I'd have to damned near kill us all to do it, which makes the effort counter-productive since there are more of them than there is of me.) So, punishment therefore has to be immediate, instructive, consistent and suited to the infraction for which it was levied.And punishment should never be a tool whereby you humiliate your children because they will strongly remember the humiliation long after they've forgotten what they were being punished for....and if they don't remember why they were being punished, then the punishment has no instructive value. Taking a 14 year old over your knee is silly, and diapering them will have the effect of humiliating them. A better solution might have been to say, "since you are so concerned with attempting to parent your brother, that will be your responsibility entirely for the weekend (when a teenager wishes to be very much otherwise occupied with other things)." Then let her attend to his every need, (listening to a million questions, getting him juice, helping clean him up after meals, making him go to bed when it's time, arguing with him about not being able to have anything to drink after a certain hour.....etc.) In this way she's teaching her 14 year old two valuable lessons. (1) Recognize the joy of not having to be a parent but a big sister, and being at peace with that role. (2) Understanding how to competently fill in for mom/dad should the need arise. What was learned by diapering her? "I hate mom/dad, and I hate my little brother, too and I can't wait to grow up and get out of this nut house!" She won't really mean that, but it is food for thought. Make punishment count for something, and not just be an arbitrary gesture.

Answer 4

When people start beating each other whenever one does wrong, it gets confusing. No wonder the 14 year old thought it was okay to spank the little boy. Sounds like the mom is leaving the 14 yr old to parent the boy and if all the 14 yr old knows of parenting techniques is the spanking she has seen, of course she's gonna try it!

Answer 5

I can't believe a 14-yr. old would "take" it. At 14, I may have been small, but nobody would've turned me over and spanked me like that ! Much less, wear diapers ! I wasn't a teenager with an attitude problem either ! (if this is not true, you're sick in the head for making it up !)

Answer 6

There's gotta be other punishments. I mean, parents can't take their 14 year olds pants off and put a diaper on her. In my opinion if a parent forces cloths off their kids, especially older ones, then that's sexual abuse. Unless their really young and they need to take a bath or need their diaper changed or something like that, then that's just wrong.

Answer 7

Actually, it's the parents fault for allowing the 14 year old to watch the younger child and shoulder the responsibility of 'raising' him when Mommy should have been home to deal with whatever the problems were. 14 year olds should not be expected to know how to handle raising a child, dealing with the frustrations of how to discipline a younger sibling etc....If she knew the 14 year old couldn't handle it, then she should not have placed her in that situation to begin with.

Answer 8

i'm getting the place you're coming from. been there carried out that once my daughter became little (the underweight component). ive been to and fro with the two kiddos on eating and foodstuff. im ultimately commencing as much as settle for and get that somewhat, in the event that they're hungry they're gonna consume. in the event that they arent they wont. i wouldnt carry the milk over her head. she the two eats or she doesnt. i advise i wouldnt on the different hand grant her ice cream or cake if she didnt consume any genuine foodstuff yet identity supply her milk. in case you're apprehensive approximately food identity do a multivitamin. different than that, it would be somewhat that she will out develop.

Answer 9

i think a 3 year old should get spanked but not on the bottom just yet.like on the arms or legs.i feel that the 14 year old should not have spanked the 3 year old on the behind because bed wetting is common for a three year old.when she is that young give her pull ups,not diapers.thats how i feel.

Answer 10

Wow! Diaper fetish.

I was believing the story until you meantioned daiapers