I met my boyfriend amidst unfavourable circumstances. We went out for a year and a half before my personal problems got in the way. He called it off. I used the year apart to sort myself out and went back to see him about getting together. He says that he's alr moved on and is alr seeing a new girl for a month. This new girl is a friend of mine too (not very close tho'). I love him so much and I believe in fighting for someone that I love. Yet should I give him up to this new girl? I don't wanna be the skank that breaks people up for my own selfish reasons. But he's The One although I also believe in there are other fish in the sea but they will never be him! PLease give me your sincere views. I'm in pain over this.
2007-08-11 21:25:42 · 12 answers · asked by Chick 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Even when he called it off when it got too tiring for him, I still perservered to keep lines of communication open. He gave up before I did. I never gave up but had asked him for some time to myself which he didn't believe in giving.
2007-08-11 21:44:38 · update #1
Let him go.. He has moved on.. and its not fair to her for you to even attempt "winning him back" Emagine how you would feel if you were dating a guy and his ex did that?
2007-08-11 21:31:54 · answer #1 · answered by neverdugdisco 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he is 100% not interested in you anymore, then, it is best for you to move on yourself because it then means he really is not good for you. BUT! I think that you should tell him what you said here, which is "I love him so much and I believe in fighting for someone that I love. Yet should I give him up to this new girl? I don't wanna be the skank that breaks people up for my own selfish reasons. But he's The One although I also believe in there are other fish in the sea but they will never be him!" ...and, see what he says. If he seems to be open to you, then tell him that you are willing to wait for him for a certain amount of time (set the time, like 3 months...or? but, not too long) to see: 1) If the new girl will work out or not, and 2) for him to decide if he wants to go back to you.
The main thing, though, is for you to take care of yourself. You may be in pain over him because HE rejected YOU. Rejection is never a good feeling. You may mainly want him back because you don't want to accept his rejection of you. Rejection, though, is not always bad. Maybe he and you as a couple would not have worked out longterm, anyway.
There ARE many other fish in the sea. If this doesn't work out, then, look at his rejection of you as an opportunity to meet a wonderful man sometime in the future.
2007-08-12 04:40:53 · answer #2 · answered by Daniella 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Keep in contact. Be friends. There's no harm in that to you, your future or his and their relationship.
Sometimes, when you're away from someone for a period of time you forget things. Sometimes you put people up on a pedestal.
Lay low, get to know him all over again. He's evolved as you have and things between you may have changed.
Then decide if he's important enough to be happy for him if he really thinks she's the one. It's hard, but you'll be able to live with yourself.
Maybe you two will get back together when he realizes how awesome you are - or maybe you'll find someone even better suited for you.
Good luck!
2007-08-12 04:35:28 · answer #3 · answered by Autumn S 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wow... I was once in this same predicament.. only I was the one who had a new boyfriend.. Sometimes ya just gotta let go.. my "other" guy is now married with a kid on the way, and he regrets it every day of his life.... if you really truly believe you two are supposed to be together, wait for him... Im a strong believer in fate.. and things happening for a reason... don't let it get you down Female... itll all end up in the right place.. I promise. Nobody said the road to where you're supposed to be doesn't hurt.. nobody said it'd be easy.. they did say if you stick with it, you'll get there.
2007-08-12 04:32:00 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I totally agree with the person with the first answer...Fate will find it's way if it's meant to be....Just make sure he always knows that you will always have a special place in your heart for him, make sure he knows how you felt during your relationship with him and even after the break-up...But out of due respect for him "DONT" interfere with his relationship right now, he may take a dislike to you if you break him and his current woman up.......Once again if it's meant to be , it will happen, until then go out with other guys as friends and see if your pain eases a little bit....It's a long road but it's meant to be traveled to see exactly where your heart stands.
2007-08-12 04:48:14 · answer #5 · answered by ldelgatta 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have had your chance the first time around. If he was the one from the start it would have happened regardless of your personal problems. You shouldn't think about breaking up another relationship. It isn't right! Time to move on to another group of friends if you are considering doing that!
2007-08-12 04:32:39 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should believe 'marriages are made in heaven by Him, the God". If you are really loving him, he will be with you. Treat this change as your testing time and have patience and consistency in your love for him. Nothing will be lost.
Do you know? What is destined to be yours can't be someones else.
2007-08-12 04:38:34 · answer #7 · answered by sv 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he is the one, fate will make it happen. Stop trying to force your will on other people and their lives. Live your own life. Let go, let go.
2007-08-12 04:31:51 · answer #8 · answered by box of rain 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Time does not wait for any one. Accept the situation as it is.
2007-08-12 04:32:18 · answer #9 · answered by sureshcm m 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should let go, looks like he moved on already
2007-08-12 04:43:05 · answer #10 · answered by David Tan 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋