My brother allowed my 18 year old daughter to go and drink and party at his house.I found out and went up there and talked to her and let her know I disaproved. He intervened and we had words. Now I'm told that I disrespected his house and his wife and he doesn't want me to come back for awhile, to let things calm down and then I'd be able to come back .
2007-08-11 15:08:26 · 17 answers · asked by physco 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
You did what you were supposed to do, you were being a mother. THAT comes first. I don't know what the legal drinking age is where you live. But, if he knowingly provided alcohol to a minor, he could go to jail. You didn't disrespect his house or his wife. You respected your daughter & your responsibilities to her. I am way too old for this, but would you adopt me?
2007-08-11 15:31:36 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your brother's an a** hole! I had a similar situation quite a few years back. My sister and brother n law took my, then 14 year old son camping. Months later they told me how he had a few beers there and started urinating on the campfire. I said,"What?!?". My son was never allowed to go anywhere with trhem again! They really thought nothing of it. You did NOT disrespect their house. They dissed you and exploited your daughter. I, personally would not want to go back!
2007-08-12 01:10:42 · answer #2 · answered by zen 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You were not disrespectful at all. Your brother broke the law by providing alcohol to a minor. Even though she is 18, it is still illegal for her to drink. He could be prosecuted with fines and jail time for doing this. He was disrespectful to you by interfering with a mother/daughter discussion.
2007-08-11 22:16:10 · answer #3 · answered by Ellen H 2 · 5⤊ 0⤋
In a way you did very wrong,to your brother and his family,though he should not let your eighteen years old daughter allow to to drink alcohol in his house parties without your consent,and you humiliated your daughter in front of other people in your brother's house.
in my opinion you should have talked to your brother alone first,and let him know that you do not appreciate that, he invites my eighteen years old daughter in his parties this is not right,and not acceptable to you as a mother.then you should have talked to your daughter alone in a nice way that you do not like her to go to my brother's parties,just because i am your mother and this is for the best interest for all of us in our family,i do not like any problem with my brother and his family just because of you,so i hope you will understand and try to avoid to create a problem,by not attending the parties no matter how much he invite you,you can always say no.
you can not put ristrictions on your brother or his family,you can force your rules to your eightenn years old just because she is your daughter and you have every right to tell her how you feel about her drinking in parties,and why you feel that way? i can't emagine how can your brother do that knowing that this is morally wrong as an uncle to invite a teenage neice in the parties for drinking,and he thinks that you dissrispected him,what about him to be dissrispected you by inviting even a teenage stranger,where as she is his own neice.
what happened you can't change that but you can change this not to happen again.by communicting each other.
2007-08-11 22:56:51 · answer #4 · answered by Feroze R 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Holy s**t, he would have been walking down the street with 3 shoes, 2 on his feet, and one of mine up his ***.
I would have kicked his ***, then my daughters all the way home.
Disrespect? Yeah, he disrespected your family. At 18, you have no authority over her legally, however, you are still the mother, and I can tell you that even in my 40's, my mother can throw the fear of G** into me when she wants to...:)
Tell him to get f**cked, he is not welcome at your home until you are over it, or he apologizes, whichever come first.....
2007-08-11 23:12:16 · answer #5 · answered by Michael H 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Girl please! If my brother pulled a stunt like that, I'd of smashed him over the head with a beer bottle and told his wife to keep out of it or she'll be next. I'd of had the cops there and been raising all kinds of hell about them providing alcohol to my daughter, something I don't even do!
2007-08-11 22:26:40 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
He should have respected your authority over your daughter. Even though she's an adult, that doesn't mean he should do something like that, unless you agree that it is OK (for him to risk being caught giving alcohol to a person under 21). You were not disrespectful, you were justifiably angry.
2007-08-11 22:22:10 · answer #7 · answered by ready4sea 4 · 4⤊ 0⤋
I would definitely go back--with the cops. Allowing an underage drinker to have alcohol is illegal. YOU disrespected HIM? What he did was disrespectful to you in a multitude of ways.
2007-08-11 23:15:00 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Actually, I feel that your brother disrespected you. He had no business allowing your daughter to drink at his house if he knew that you did not approve of her drinking.
2007-08-11 22:43:34 · answer #9 · answered by jcf6865 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yes. You need to let things cool off.
What is drinking age in your state? If it's 18, what can you do?
You've told HER that you disapprove and now it's her choice.
Continue to pray for her, that she will make the right decisions.
2007-08-11 22:17:19 · answer #10 · answered by autimom 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋