I'm with this guy but everything we argue i'm the one who has to make up with him because he says im the one who always argues with him. Well i;m not going to lie but i feel like i'm the one who does everything but he dosent do anything he always expects me to do everything. I know he loves me because his be there for me but how could i tell him how i feel but we don't end up arguing about me telling him that i think he dosen't do anything to for our relationship.
2007-08-11 12:02:04 · 7 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
It isn't okay. Relationships are about give and take. If you are the one always doing the giving, there isn't much left for yourself.
2007-08-11 12:06:15 · answer #1 · answered by cookie 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The whole idea of a real mature--adult relationship is the 2 way street concept. A relationship is made of 2 people--2 share everything--2 have to work at it everyday. A real relationship has effective communications--yelling and fighting is NOT effective communications---where did you people learn this lousy behavior?? And you have to make up??? well guess what--he treats you like crap so you have to make up---then he feels like the winner--another idiotic man thinking he is superior to a woman. the whole thing is disrespectful and not at all normal....it borders on abuse to blame you and make you feel like crap---mental duress--that's what it is called. He is starting to exhibit bad traits that will only wind up destroying your mind and probably your body too. If you don't apologize he'll smack you around and then make you feel you deserved it---ABUSE--got it?? I know you won't admit it--you are already brainwashed--so make up your mind and do something--stop whining and stand up to him ---tell him you will NOT endure this any longer---he will learn to speak like a man and treat you with respect or you will be GONE. That is final-------sorry but the relationship is probably too far gone--so good luck
2007-08-11 12:14:59 · answer #2 · answered by fire_inur_eyes 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sit down one night and tell him you have something that has been bothering you and you would like to talk to him about it without him getting mad or upset, and you have to do the same if he says something you do not like. When speaking to him, put everything in the 'I' format, not the 'you' format. Otherwise he will feel like you are blaming him for everything and will become defensive about it. Say something like, "I feel like even though we both attribute to our arguments or problems, I am the only one ending up appologizing or trying to fix it and I do not think that is fair to me. I would like for you to work with me when we have an issue to discuss, not against me so that we do not get into an argument or mad at each other." Something like that should help. Good luck!
2007-08-11 12:12:35 · answer #3 · answered by Angelic Valentine 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Take a break and evaluate your relationship - don't tell him it's a break just go away for a few days alone - to a friends, family or even a spa - just clear your head and when you return you will know what to do. Good Luck!
2007-08-11 12:06:05 · answer #4 · answered by Walking on Sunshine 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No it is not ok to always be the one who fixes the problem in a relationship; it takes 2 to tango and you cant dance alone. (thats a figure of speech)
2007-08-11 12:15:28 · answer #5 · answered by eddie 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
thats not good! he should be helping out. If you guys can't agree and something you shouldnt have to give in you should make a compromise or at least he should hear you out!
2007-08-11 12:05:31 · answer #6 · answered by Sam 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
its okay...just not always easy..that's all
2007-08-11 12:04:59 · answer #7 · answered by Queen 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋