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I don't know how to approach the topic of next steps for myself and my daughter with my parents. They are very opinionated and dominating.

I have to decide if my ex-husband, daughter and I will live together once again as a family or my daughter will stay with me. We live in different states.

I have to make plans soon as my daughter's school starts soon and she needs to be mentally prepared for which school she is going to attend.

My father thinks that he and my mother should talk to my daughter and convince her that she should stay in California.

My daughter feels that my life will be smoother here, but more normal with her father.

I don't want to same situation to repeat with my ex-husband. It was hard for me to deal with his controlling ways and he could be verbally mean.

My dad gives too much importance to my job which will be ending soon anyway since its contract.

How do I start discussing this topic with my parents?

2007-08-11 04:08:24 · 12 answers · asked by Stareyes 5 in Family & Relationships Family

12 answers

Remember when we talked about making decisions based upon your needs verses opinions of your parents. Let them voice their opinion to YOU NOT YOUR DAUGHTER Your parents are under the assumption that they have a major decision to make, however, the decision is YOURS. Recall how resilient 15 yr. olds are/ she is basing her opinion on what she conceives is normal- give it a go alone with her so she can see and feel what normal is in your world. A job is important- It pays for our existence however, another job is around the corner for you. When your daughter is OUT of the house express to your parents exactly what we discussed here- listen to them- value their thoughts, but take the final control and make the best decision you for you and your daughter based upon your OPINION. Really, once you think it thru logically then the answer will be right there. You and only YOU can and will make a choice for your future. Stareyes, we would LOVE to give you quick solutions- however, you are at a cross road and you need to decide which path to take. What ever it is and where ever it takes you the support of .us who respond with some type of answers are here to supoprt you and try to give you the encouragement to step up and out.

2007-08-12 08:54:23 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 2 0

I"ve been there, found out after years of heart ache that I should have made it on my own with my daughter! You can do that can't you? You sound like a smart woman! You decide what to do, don't let other people make the decision for you, because odds are in the end you will regret it and you can't get that time back. good luck!

2007-08-11 04:34:01 · answer #2 · answered by firecracker 4 · 0 0

you need to do what is best for you & your child. If you feel that living with your daughter will be good for her & you then that i s the thing to do.
Dont be scared of your parents opinion of you , you need to be parent for your child & everything else will fall in place . you need to take your decision inform your daughter of her future plans and plan your life around that.
your parents may not like you taking your own decision without consulting them ,but they will adjust to it once they see that you are happy with your daughter.
However you need to stand firm on whatever decision you make& not give your parents any chance to point fingers.

2007-08-11 04:24:10 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1 0

Easy... you decide what you want to do, then you let them know what you will be doing. This is your life and you have to make the decisions for what is best for you. Weigh all the options and then let them know your plans. If they don't like it, oh well... you are an adult with a child. Time to start living for your family and not for them.

2007-08-11 04:33:05 · answer #4 · answered by az_mommma 6 · 1 0

How previous are you? i think of asserting, "Its been 2 months considering my birthday and you nevertheless have not gotten me a modern" right now makes you sound like a brat. in the journey that your father and mom have been going to get you some thing, they could are turning out to be it by now. for sure, its time to easily flow on. As for the cellular telephone, make a catalogue of clarification why you think of you % a cellular telephone. in case you merely merely % it using fact its cool and all your acquaintances have one, then you definately can in all threat merely ignore approximately it. in case you handle the subject count with your father and mom approximately why a cellular telephone could be sensible nevertheless, that they had be extra probably to evaluate it. it may additionally be a very good theory to do your analyze first. discover out how a lot one expenses and how a lot the month-to-month plans are. interior the top nevertheless, in the journey that your father and mom say no, then it quite is that.

2016-10-14 23:31:56 · answer #5 · answered by ? 4 · 1 0

It's your life. Consider your parent's opinions, they have all ready told you how you feel. Write a list of pros and cons of both living situations. You are an adult, and you can make your own choices without consulting your parents all the time.

2007-08-11 04:27:12 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1 0

It is you life and your daughters life they can't tell you what is best cause only a mother would know whats best for their child and I am sure you know what is best for yours. Tell them what is going to happen and if they want to accept that they can and they can be apart of our lives and help us out. If they don't want to listen to what you have to say tell them again what your going to do and let them know you can do it by yourself that you don't need them. Then leave and do what you said you were going to do. Good Luck

2007-08-11 04:20:23 · answer #7 · answered by Mel 1 · 1 0

while you apparently love and respect your parents, you need to make your own decisions...

you don't have to give excuses or rationalize your decisions on your parents' account.

your daughter shouldn't control your decisions, but taking her life into consideration is very important, i do realize.

do what is best for YOU and your daughter... make YOUR OWN DECISIONS.. you are a grown woman.

2007-08-11 04:35:11 · answer #8 · answered by letterstoheather 7 · 2 0

I'm sure that they will be more than happy to assist you in any way they can. Just be frank. Call them and talk to them about it. Like you said your parents are opinionated so I'll bet they won't be terrified to tell you what they think.

2007-08-11 04:19:09 · answer #9 · answered by Prez Monella 1 · 0 0

Why do you have to discuss it with them? This should be between you, your daughter and your ex.

2007-08-11 04:21:40 · answer #10 · answered by Dovahkiin 7 · 1 0

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