Should I Hate My Dad?

Question

My dad left my mom one year ago. He always was mad couldnt take the blame for anything he used to complain to get a free meal. He tried to kill our family by taking us to get mcdonalds almost every meal even though he is a doctor and makes a lot of money he always said he had no money so he wouldnt get us anything nice. He never held the door for my mom very ungentlemanly. Never gave my mom anything good for there anervirsery. Caused my brother to have a jacked up leg by using physical action with him. Lifted my sister up by her ears!!!! used to get mad at stuff thats not even good enough to get mad at used to never let us play he would never let me do anything fun.

Hes gone but hes steal being a jerk he wont pay my mom child support

Answer 1

tried to kill you by taking you to McDonalds? get a salad! get a job, buy your own food.


just be happy he's gone. your mom needs to get child support.

Answer 2

First off let me say that it is a good thing he is out of the household, now your mom can provide a better environment for you & your siblings. Sounds as though your dad may have some anger issues...not directed necessarily at you or your family, but definitely some anger going on there. Even as an adult he is probably overwhelmed with whatever his issues may be. Don't hate your dad...you will harbor resentment towards him because no one should treat their loved ones that way, but do not hate him. As hard as it may be, try to understand him. Your mom has resources to use to get the child support from him...the local child support agency can do what is called an income withholding. It is tough when a parent is angry all the time...especially if you dont understand why. Your dad did the right thing by leaving...as tough as that may be...but he needs to get his own life together & deal with his own issues. Hopefully he will someday realize his loss & get the help he needs. Good luck!

Answer 3

Let your mom deal with all the legal actions that require getting support from him. Don't ever close the door to your dad. People can change. For now, it sounds like you have a lot of resentment and anger inside. It would be good if you could talk to a professional about this. They will be able to help you through the stress he's caused in your life. As for hating him, NO, hate doesn't accomplish anything. Always love him, but you don't have to love how he treated you or the others in your family. Pity him. He had a wonderful family and never appreciated you guys.

Answer 4

hate is a very strong word. Never hate- it may seem hard with the history that you have had with your father and I'm really sorry about that. I wouldn't be mad at him for the materialistic side of things (nothing good for presents, no good food) because that can't really tell how your father really is. I would be very upset with him for leaving you guys and mess up your brother's foot and sister's ears. That was very awful of him for do that but, maybe try to reconcile with him now that he has left the house. You could talk to him and visit with him and in return he can gove you more than he did when he was living at your house. This way you can leave whenever you want! Whatever you do though, don't hate your father sweetie.

Answer 5

I am not saying that you should hate him, even though it may be impossible not to, from what I've heard. The fact remains, he is still your father and you cannot get rid of the half of you which you got from him. To me it sounds like he has serious mental problems and anger management issues he needs to address immediately before he kills someone. He lifted your sister by her ears? The mere fact that he would treat his own child like that is proof that he needs to learn how to control himself. My advice, be the bigger person and remain noncommittal. Be grateful for the fact that he is gone and is no longer around to hurt you, your mother and your siblings. Be there for your mother and show her that you love her and will always cherish her because it sounds like she is your main (if not only) supporter. I know that it may sound corny but try to make the best out of a bad situation. I believe there is a little thing called karma and sooner or later, all the bad things your father has done will come back to haunt him. Guaranteed.

Answer 6

You don't hate people you hate what they do.
Your presenting only your perception of the situation, listening to only one side doesn't show all the issues involved.
People taking you to MacDonald's are not trying to kill you. Why didn't your mother cook meals? Why didn't you learn how to cook?
Many men do not open doors to women in fact most don't.. this was caused by women's lib your father was probably taught that it was rude to do so.
Anniversary's are to mark a wedding date and doesn't necessarily include presents.
You would need to prove that your brother and sister were physically harmed by your father. Some men get angry for many reasons until you learn the real reasons for your Father's anger; I would say get all the facts of the situation before making such a harsh statement.
Courts make men pay child support, he has a job, so again there are obviously other factors involed you are not aware of..

Answer 7

hate is a very strong word.i can see you being mad at him but hate,no.i could never hate either of my parents.my dad was abusive to my mom when we were kids but their still married and going on 56 years now.their in their 70's but their both a lot more feeble now and appreciate each other more today than back then.i would say be glad he's gone and start living your life now the way you want to,just be careful.i'm sure mom is and she's probably better off now without him.

Answer 8

Question is~~~ why didn't your Mom leave him along time ago?? I WOULD NOT PUT UP WITH ANYONE TREATING MY KIDS LIKE THAT~~~~DAD OR NOT!!! His *** would be in jail for abuse!!! You don't need him back in the house!!! He is dangerous to you all~~~however he is your Dad, and though you hate him for what he DID, you shouldn't hate him!!! He needs to get some help FAST!! As a family you all can get him some help to show that you love him and maybe all of this can be put behind you~~~He has real issues he NEEDS to deal with before someone else gets hurt!! I'm sorry that you had to go through this...if you need to talk you have a friend!

Answer 9

hi hon...

your mother chose your father as a partner, and believe me when i say.. people don't change that much after marriage, and i'm sure he was abusive BEFORE they got married....

so it's not just one person's fault.... she may have thought he'd change... truth is, people don't change unless they WANT TO change..

that being said, the courts will take care of the child support and go after your father for that.... i'm sure that eventually he will have to pay.

i'm sorry your father is abusive -- he has problems with anger and stress, and is taking it out on the family instead of getting some help or finding an outlet for his anger... it's sad, and i'm so sorry for your family.

perhaps you could seek out some help? suggest to your mother family therapy if you think it's a good idea? sometimes talking things through and learning how to "let go" and cope with what life throws at us does help. we just have to do the work the therapist suggests and see what works for us.

i hope th ings improve.. take care of YOU.. hug hug

Answer 10

never hate your father maybe he sufferes from something thta makes so he will change sure try to understand him what he has try to help him he is not normal but i should tell you something a father is a father that's a big sens i cant explain further you know i love dady i adore him i kill myself before i hurt him or desturbe him i feel happy coz i have that great feelinfg of having a dad your father is not oky try to find your real dad inside him he reaally loves you inside his heart there is the feeling and the passion of fatherhood so oneday he will wake up from that nightmare you are living in he will be sorry wait he will change just dont' hate your dad never one day you will be a parent you need to feel for one second that you had a dad love your father understand him he is suffering try to help him love him