I've only dealt with a 'few' on a really close level, and this has left me with this impression - That i cannot REALLY trust them. Can't trust them to 'trust themselves' about their own emotions.
For example, I had a g/f. She had a few issues, but mainly she wanted me to love her, be there for her, etc. Understandable. I tried to be a man about it and work with her. Eventually we broke up, both 'moved on.' But i still 'cared' about her, i just wanted to date others. But she, who was really an emotional psycho about us being together, was now acting like i was a nobody. She had a new b/f, tried to call me arrogant and selfish. WTF? I was always the same person in our whole relationship. Months later, she's telling me all the good things she used to like about me. So which one was it? But the damage had already been done. I didn't know what to believe.
And my mom, she frequently MAKES UP negative things about me that aren't even true. Then i spend time trying to argue w/her that
2007-08-10 19:55:38 · 9 answers · asked by Anonymous 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
she's wrong. And the whole thing is pointless. Yet, she has nothing but good things to say about me to other ppl.
As i said, I've only been close on a deeper level with a few. But does it get any better than this?!?!?!
Is there any mature woman who actually always (or at least mostly) says what she REALLy means?
2007-08-10 19:57:32 · update #1
My whole point is: I don't trust women (not cheating) because they usually speak from the emotions and those can vary, so how can I really know what REAL?
2007-08-10 19:58:48 · update #2
I just want to mention this is NOT about being faithful/cheating, etc. It's about emotions, etc. And oh, I got over mom. But the g/f, she was so passionate about being together forever n such. I can't say i returned the feelings 100%, but i gave up things to make it work. Then one day she kinda just... switched. And I'm like wtf? what happened to all the feeling you had expressed b4?
Consequences of being a smart man and thinking that women actually think with their brain....
The thing is, all my girl-friends were all so great! But they were just friends! And the one i decide to take to a relationship level, she was the one who was super emotional.
2007-08-10 20:08:28 · update #3
Sorry to say this, but you might as well get used to not understanding women. You are right about their emotions...they're very complex. It seems to me that this girl you were with felt hurt after you broke up. Therefore, she wanted to make you feel like you still needed her afterwards. She probably wanted you to feel sorry for the way you guys ended up...that's just a woman thing, especially if she really loved you and still had strong feelings for you. After a while, however, when she realized that retaliating with anger had no effect on you, she reverted back to being nice. I know it's complicated, but there's one point behind it: she really loved you.
Women are strange creatures, but they all make us better people in the end. You can't read them, you don't understand them, but think about it...would you be able to exist without them?
2007-08-10 20:01:35 · answer #1 · answered by find_your_nirvana 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Your feelings make perfect sense because of your past experiences. Naturally you're goin 2 b a little 'gun shy' because the only women u hav as a Gage so far hav been rude.Until u work on it u will prob gravitate toward women who r negative cuz that's what u were taught the whole time growing up (mom).She was your prime example of what women r like.The 1 u saw most often anyhow.Ur not alone. My friends and I hav all felt that way at 1 time or another about men.U just haven't met the rite 1 yet.Sure I agree w/ u. Some women ARE absolute bi_ches.Not all of us..sounds like she had very erratic behavior.Don't take it personally and trust me.The right 1 will totally win over ur trust I promise.
2007-08-11 03:08:59 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your last g/f sounds like you hurt her. So why would she say she cares about you. To her the damage is done. Did u
say that you cared for you last g/f but you wanted to date other??? I hope not! That means she wanted a serious relationship and you weren't ready to settle down.. Do you understand why she couldn't show her true feelings? If not good for you! Maybe she possibly had a trust issue...
Yes there are girls out there you can trust. But you should always have your guard up. Thats in any relationship. People are afraid to get hurt. No one (nowadays) can trust anyone. Everyone carries there past relationships to the next one.
If you really like someone and want to start a NEW relationship..don't carry your past relationships w/ you!! Start over new! Still keep your heart protected..but if you are really interested in this girl, try to be her friend first. Once you really understand this girl and care for her as a friend..you will see a whole side to a new relationship you've never seen. Since you guys started off as friends, and didn't rush things..you both will care for each other...as friends and yet more.
What I am trying to get to is if you really like a girl..try and know her first before you rush things! Since this advice is coming from a girl w/ much relationship advice to offer! TAKE MY ADVICE. If you want to start a GOOD RELATIONSHIP! Be friends first...understand this girl...and think about why your last relationships went wrong.
As long as your honest..and you take things slow...WHY WOULDN'T YOU BE ABLE TO TRUST "THIS GIRL"? YOUR FRIEND ?????? Be friends first!!!! Take it slow and be honest! You can't go wrong! I promise!
2007-08-11 03:10:54 · answer #3 · answered by Kendra420 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Every woman is different. You can't say that you don't trust them. Trust is a scary thing & once you do that, you are vulnerable.
Then again, trust is a VERY important thing in a serious relationship. The women who have hurt you are out of your life now (except your mom). So if you say you can't trust women generally, then i think you have to ask yourself why then. It is not the women's fault. Not all women in this world are interested just to betray your trust.
2007-08-11 03:02:02 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Your trust issue stems from mom.
Work that out, or let it go, and see if your outlook changes.
Your mom, and these girls, were only a few. There are 10 million out there.
But if you treat them all the same because of your issue, you'll get the same result over and over again.
2007-08-11 03:01:08 · answer #5 · answered by Ade 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
it's like anything else...you have to take chances with love. LOOK AT THE DIVORCE RATE...It could be that you are not picking the best gals...you sound young still, so you need to take your time. date a lot, There are very wonderful women out there...
2007-08-11 03:04:20 · answer #6 · answered by catherine 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My friend I feel your pain. In my case we werent dating, i made that clear we was just havin fun. Its like she is saying i dont care for her because i dont wanna be with her. It all sounds like jealously to me. Jealously and selfishness. You cant force a relationship, some just dont understand that.
2007-08-11 03:03:35 · answer #7 · answered by Flying Spagetti Monster 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
In my exp they are Un-predictable you just dont know when they change suddenly,So they can be trusted.
2007-08-11 03:05:02 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
most definitely. sorry bud
2007-08-11 02:59:28 · answer #9 · answered by blue i's 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋