When should I send my son to preschool?

Question

Good morning all. I was wondering if anyone can lend me some advice. I want to know if I should send my toddler to preschool for 3 year olds. I'm nervous about it though; my son (Eddie) is hearing impaired, and wears hearing aids [which he loves to try and flush down the toilet] and I don't want abuncha little kids playing with them. He's also the son of two very proud fathers, and I don't want that to be an issue if we decide to send him.

I'm anxious to hear what you have to say. IM or email is fine with me; address and YIM is madmajito.

Thanks all,
--Max

Answer 1

Preschool is not required but it can be a wonderful experience if you choose the right one. Call your local elementary school, social service agencies, and churches and ask for the names and phone numbers of preschool programs in your area. Then call those programs and ask what their license is. Ask what credentials their teachers have, and what sort of schedule the children follow. You want a program with a schedule that allows for both structured and unstructured activities for the children. Explain your son's hearing challenge and ask if they are prepared to deal with that (any GOOD preschool program should be able to handle it). Visit the programs that sound good to you and observe a class in progress. Once you have chosen a program for your son, try to volunteer a little time in the classroom on a regular basis so you can see firsthand what your child is experiencing. Also, it's a lot of fun to go in and play for a little while now and then, and a good preschool teacher will welcome your participation. Don't over-look the Head Start program. They have excellent classes in many areas (although some are better than others). They are income-qualified programs, but often accept over-income families for a variety of reasons.

Teaching acceptance of social and physical differences is a big part of what we do in preschool, so don't let those kinds of differences stop you from seeking out a good early education experience for your child.

Answer 2

Discuss the hearing aids with the teachers there. Be sure to mention him trying to flush them down the toilet and what kind of steps you take to prevent that.

Regarding your family situation, be up front about that as well. Some people may be uncomfortable, especially at first. This is a sad, yet true, aspect of our society. You'll have to judge whether they will handle you differently or act differnetly.

Most GOOD preschools will welcome any student they can handle. By that, I mean that some students will need a specially trained teacher. I had one student who had autism last year and it was just something I didn't know how to work with well. I learned a lot and tried quite a few things that worked, but it just was an issue where I felt our school was best for the child. If your child has hearing difficulties and the hearing aids seem to have it under control - and there's no other real issues - I would say that part doesn't matter much at all as far as getting him admitted somewhere.

Matt

Answer 3

I work at a preschool for 3-4 yr. olds. It's ok if you need to, although if you dont need to I might wait another year til he's 4. Then he can express himself a little better. Be very aware that preschools can be different as night and day. Choose carefully and let your son give you cues. If he's not comfortable, do not force him. You must be especially sure your teacher will be supportive of the fact of his disability. Yes, kids at this age will be more than happy to help him flush them down the toilet! So talk to the teacher and visit once or twice at least before leaving him there.

If you get any hint that the teacher will not be attentive and caring, find another one. Let your intuition rule on this choice. Your son will let you know if he feels comfortable. Even after you decide on one......drop in now and then unannounced if you can. Pay attention to how your son acts when you pick him up and the other children too. Are they happy? A little nervousness is normal, but a good teacher and staff will accomadate him and treat him as any other child. And let him have time to adjust.

Answer 4

I am a preschool teacher and I have a class of three year olds. I think three is the perfect age to start your child off in preschool. Three year olds are very accepting of differences and at their young age they hold no prejudices. Throughout the school year and in our curriculum, we talk about families and diversity. Many of the kids in my class don't come from a nuclear family household. We talk about our families and how they are different. I had a little boy in my class who had two mommies and all the kids knew that "Parker" has two mommies. To my three year olds, "Parker" having two mommies was no different than someone else living with their grandma or having only a mommy or a daddy.

About the hearing aid... I would suggest having a discussion with the children and introducing them to the hearing aid device. Many children may have never seen one before and are probably curious about it. You could explain to them how it works, how it's worn, and how it's cared for. You may want to emphasize that only adults can touch it. Most times if you tell them only adults can touch it, they will listen. You can also tell them it does not go in the toilet that way if they see Eddie trying to put it in the toilet, they can remind him not to do it. You can also explain to them about the purpose of the hearing aid the same way I explain to the children about people who wear glasses. For example I tell them that _____'s ears don't work very well and s/he needs to wear glasses so that they can see better.

I know you're probably nervous and anxious. Don't be! I would explain my concerns to the teacher and the school director. Find out how they would approach your concerns.

In my years of teaching, I have found that adults are the ones who have the prejudices and insecurities about things that are different. I think by introducing and exposing children to something new, it will help them become a more well-rounded, accepting individual in the future.

Good luck!

Answer 5

The only way you can know if it is too early is to go ahead and send him. I sent my oldest son to preschool a little early and at the end of the school year, his teachers told me that while he was intellectually ready, he was still too emotionally immature. So he attended preschool for another year before moving on to kindergarten. That time, he did fine. I didnt feel like it was any big deal he got held back that young. By the way he is 12 now, and does great. It sounds like your Son is ahead of the curve so it will probably work out.

Answer 6

Preschool is just one option. Great once-a-week activities include gym class, karate class, swimming lessons, library story time, or art or music class. These types of activities give children an opportunity to socialize with other children their age, be introduced to having other authority figures in their life, are educational, fun, usually have small class sizes, and are usually only an hour long.

If you live in a metropolitan area your city will have an organization for the deaf and hearing impaired. They should be a great source of information. Ask them what type of activities they suggest for hearing impaired children that are offered in your area.

And don't ever concern yourselves about the two daddy thing. Just stay focused on pouring love and respect into your precious son. Others will see what great caring fathers your son has and it will help deter any "issues" that may arise.

Answer 7

The sooner he is exposed to others the better. When I have kids I plan to send them at age two for two days a week. Perhaps you should send your child 3 times a week. Teachers are smart enough to watch out for a child's best interest. At first the kids will be in awe over his hearing aid, but after a day or so, they won't see it anymore. Good luck.

Answer 8

I can understand your fears regarding prejudice against your child for the various reasons you outline. One of the biggest underlying currents throughout preschool programs is acceptance of all, regardless of differences. At the age of 3, children may notice differences but are a lot more accepting of those differences than adults are. I have had many years of teaching children with autism, cerebal palsey, down syndrome etc... and it was amazing to see how the rest of the class embraced these children, and were so protective and nurturing!

I know it is hard, containing those nerves, but you need to stop and think for the sake of your child..... do you want your child to mimic that nervousness, or get out there and experience different things, and begin developing the coping mechanisms he will need to deal with society. We all want to protect our children and do what we think is best for them, but sometimes protecting them due to our fears is not always the most appropriate way to go about things. It is so much harder to expose them to others and their ideals, but if you can try to do that, and keep an eye on them at the same time, you will be allowing your child to gain valuable experience to aid them in their life experiences and how to cope for the future!

Answer 9

I would suggest to send him to one only 2-3 times per week. I taught preschool for 25 years. I found out if you start out a child when they are three they are more apt to get burnt out by the end of the next year. I would definitely find a preschool that would work with him because of his hearing impairment. That would sure help him out alot before he starts kindergarten.

Answer 10

Preschool is not required. I didn't go to preschool and I became 4th in my graduating class (just graduated). Also the 7th in class kid, my friend, didn't go. Keeping them out and keeping them around adults rather than other kids can easily advance him. I was reading at age 3 and knew all the states and capitols at age 5. So preschool is not required.