in seperate rooms from the rest of his family if say they had pink eye 5 days prior to coming over. They are spanked(used to be with a paddle or belt till I stopped it) now just as hard with his hand if they get dirtyu(hello they are kids)or if they dont finish the last bight of dinner. they are forced to watch scary movies not appropriate for their age, and the list goes on. my kids do not feel safe nor like a family their. He is paying court ordered chil support, but will I get in trouble if I stop the weekends over there for my kids sake?
2007-08-10 08:58:36 · 18 answers · asked by haileydevan 1 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Parenting
You need to take it back to court and talk to a judge about it, In the mean time, you should talk to a lawyer to see what can be done legally to protect your kids in the mean time. Getting hit or spanked for not finishing a meal is basically making an excuse to abuse them. Best luck to you and your darling angels!!
2007-08-10 09:02:42 · answer #1 · answered by quirky 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He's paying for their support, not for the right to have his kids visit him so he can abuse them. I'd say you need to have the court re-examine the custody and visitation arrangement, soon. If Dad dislikes the kids so much, why does he want them to visit? Was he like this when you were married? Social services or child protective services needs to have a look at this situation. But don't stop the visitations on your own, because yes you could be the one getting in trouble.
2007-08-10 09:12:03 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think you should discuss this with a lawyer, or you could try talking to him and tell him that it bothers you. If I was you i wouldn't let the kids go over on weekends and i would explain him why.. You may get in trouble, but remember that the law always protects the kids. The kids sake is the most important thing here. To make sure, talk to a lawyer. Good luck
2007-08-10 09:09:07 · answer #3 · answered by Tesorito 3 · 0⤊ 2⤋
in reality, you could get in trouble if you don't let them go over there if he has court appointed visitation rights. this will have to be something you go through the courts. if he has visitation and you refuse, he could call the cops and MAKE you give them to him, and that would just be one strike against you. at least that's how it is in TN. You can talk to a lawyer about getting emergency custody through the courts, but be prepared to battle. i would be afraid if he is that mean to your kids that if you said anything to him about it that he would just do it more or worse to assert his "manliness" or something stupid. if he is doing that to his own kids he is not exactly rational.
and btw...in my personal experience, the courts won't let you just stop the child support payments. if you have a boyfriend or are remarried, you could see if he would be willing to give up his parental rights so he won't have to pay child support anymore, and then he won't have any parental rights to see the kids.
2007-08-10 09:25:19 · answer #4 · answered by Brandy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to go back to court and you need to take a lawyer with you. Ask the court to arrange an independent evaluation of the kids by a psychologist and to appoint advocates or Law Guardians for them.
2007-08-10 13:05:59 · answer #5 · answered by EC Expert 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
make sure that you have evidence for this and go to the court straight away make sure he is banned from sking care of them completely (loosing parental rights), these kids need a safe home and if they do something wrong it is unapropriate to punish them so harshly.
Firstly kids should be talked to if they seriously do something wrong not hit or separated especially over stupid things like not finishing their last bite of dinner! That is very bad and you seriously going to need to sort it out, because later on in the life they might turn against you that you did not do nothing to help them and they will become to hate you both!
And secondly the kids will have put their dads behaviour to their hearts and to the same to their children, not because they want to but because thats the only method they will know!!!
Or worse one day it may end in tragedy although your ex husband may not want to but he may get out of control and seriously hurt your children!!!!
So act now!
2007-08-10 09:10:16 · answer #6 · answered by cjp201 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Unfortunately you cannot just stop him from seeing the kids. Maybe, since he doesn't really act like he wants them there anyway, he would agree to less visits or to none all together.
Otherwise, you will have to go back to court and try to prove to the judge that your kids are being treated like this. Or just stop the child support payments.
2007-08-10 09:22:21 · answer #7 · answered by Tina 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If you have not already you need to sit down and have a serious talk with the father. Give him a chance to change, if the kids are still uncomfortable there, than you need to go through a lawyer to get supervised visits or none.
2007-08-10 09:08:21 · answer #8 · answered by Nyx 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to go through the courts to change the custody. If he has a legal right to see the kids, you could get in trouble if you don't let him see them. Best of luck.
2007-08-10 09:02:24 · answer #9 · answered by kat 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to let your lawyer know what's going on...and get this through the courts, stop sending them over to his dad's over the weekend, then you can get it straightened out at the courts!...it's not good for your children to be around a guy like that. Stop it now! while you fix it through the courts. Good luck.
2007-08-10 09:06:13 · answer #10 · answered by Diana 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋