All current active, and vets know that from time to time, we have experienced moments of humorous events?

Question

away from the travesties of combat!!! Would you tell some of these events to the world, just for the " snickers" and laughter, now?? I. E. Learning to ski on snow, the first time, atop a high Alp Mountain, in front of compadres, and the girl friend?? Learning to ice skate on ice, 1/2 inch thick?? etc.

KEEP THEM COMING GUY'S and GAL'S !!!!
Now I will tell of my first(and only time) on snow ski's!! I am from the very southern tip of Texas, had never seen snow, before going to Ft. Devins, Mass. in Jan. '57. As a pre- ado;esence I had roller skated a bit, and in high school, I had the opportunity to water ski, on the Arroyo Colorado, an old Rio Grand River bed. In Feb. or March, '57, the water on robins pond had frozen over, and I being 10 feet tall, 210 lbs., (and the worlds greatest lover and athlete) and bullet proof was going to show these "damned yankees" how to skate!! I borrowed a pair ( that damned yankee was exceptionally eager to let me use his), and started out across the ice. OOOOPPPPPPSSSS!!!!!! Through the ice I went, got wet as hell ( water only about 2 feet deep), and almost froze to death before getting back into the barricks, stripped bare, and had to indure the crap of showering to warm up, and only about 150 men looking and laughing their asz'z off!!! (skiing next

Skiing:: as mentioned before about skiing!! The winter after I got into Bad Aibling, Germany, (there was snow visable year around on the tops of the Alps, only a few miles to our south) I had to show those yankee snowdiggers that skiing was an easy thing, if you had ever water skied, behind a power boat!!! Still, I am 10 feet tall, 210 lbs, the worlds greatest lover and athlete!!!
So, on a sunday morning, in Jan.'59 here we go !!! about 7 of us piled into my ol' Buick station wagon, and off to the Alps we go. After getting to the top of an "adult ./ experienced only" ski lift, I rented a set of ski's, put them on and I "AM READY TO SHOW THE WORLD EXACTLY HOW THIS IS SUSPOSED TO BE DONE" WEEELLLLLLL !!!!!!! About 10 feet after I begin the downward part, THERE WAS A TERRIABLE EXPLOSION!!!! THAT WAS MY ASZ HITTING THE SKI SLOPE !!!! I ROLLED, SLID, TUMBLED, SKIDDED, FOREVER, AND EVER, AND EVER, AND EVER !!!!! I DID NOT THINK I WAS EVER GOING TO STOP !!!!! I WAS ON TOP OF SNOW, IN SNOW,

Under snow, the snow was all over, around and IN ME !!! In my eyes, ears, nose, mouth, and YYYEEEESSSSSS up my asz !!! amazing just how much snow can be packed into the various areas of the 10 foot, 210 lb. MORON !!!!!! When I did finally stop, I HURT !!!!! Nothing broken (THE BIG BOSS ABOVE TAKE'S CARE OF FOOLS, IDIOTS, AND ME!!!), but bruised all over !!! It took over 40 minuets for me to climb / crawl back to the top !!! " MY BUDDY'S and GIRL FRIEND LAUGHED SO HARD, THEY COULD NOT HELP ME CLIMB BACK TO THE TOP OF THE SKI SLOPE / LIFT !!!!One of my "FRIENDS" laughed so hard, he urinated in his pants" !!! FACT !!!
TODAY, I LAUGH TO MYSELF, ABOUT THE FOOLISHNESS OF YOPUTH, having been there, done that, bought the tee shirt, and paid the tax !!!

Answer 1

Had a new troop, and we were flying from Ft. Bragg for a jump into Ft. Polk. I stuck some of my beef stew MRE into a barf bag and when we hit some turbulence, I pretended I threw up into the barf bag, acted like I was wiping my mouth with the edge of the bag, pulled out my spoon and dipped it into that stew and took a bite. I dipped it in again and offered some to that new troop, and he lost it. The rest of the stick laughed their azzes off, but the new troop sure didn't!!!!

Answer 2

We were standing outside of the Finance building and the LT. was playing around with his 45 and it went off and he blew a hole through the window air conditioner. Then Top comes running out of the building swearing and grabs the weapon out of the LT's hand and says let me show you how to handle this weapon and proceeds to shoot the same air conditioner again by accident. I've seen a LT. shoot the dash board of his own car with his 45 by accident, and we dug the slug out and in cased it in Plexiglas as a memento for him. But it was funny when he asked the CO where he could get another round to replace the one he expended and the CO asked who he shot ,then the LT had to explain he shot his own car!

Answer 3

on my visit to Camp Fuji Japan, the ground was frozen solid with a light dusting of snow..Im from Los Angeles and all my buddys were snickering that i would not be able to walk on it..i never thought anything of it, when we got off the buses with all of our gear i took 2 or 3 steps on the ice and quickly met the ground..i couldnt walk on the ice, they said there is a special way to walk so you dont slip, i never got the hang of it, my legs were sore the whole time we were there.and so was my ***

Answer 4

I had a soldier who looked at a red hot yukon stove and ask if it was hot, just as he touched the red part and screamed out... oww!

Then I guess, just to make sure he reached down with same hand to make sure I guess. Same result too.

Answer 5

Yes, too many to list. If not for laughing at the idiocy and absurdity of Army life, soldiers would lose their minds...err...those that had one to start with.

Answer 6

Tooooo many to list. Did have a driver (M1A1 Abrams tanks) that didn't know his left from his right. We had to draw a L and a R on his hands.