Is it right to date a married man?

Question

I am talking with this man that I work with and recently found out that he is married? In working with this man I mean we have daily contact (not in the same office). So far all we have done is talked and made suggestive comments to each other. My problem is that after talking & meeting with him we both grown attractived to each other and want to take it to the next level.

I have not been in a relationship for over 4 years now and find this to be the most excitement I've had in a long time.

What should I do?

Answer 1

Stop being a biatch. That's very disrespectful to his wife. How would you like it if some woman were doing that w/your future husband, if you can get one. It sounds like you're desperate and there must be a reason like your poor morals for instance that have probably driven men far far away. Shame on you, and sure go ahead and live in sin.

Answer 2

Although I understand that you haven't had very much action in the dating realm in the past four years...this is not that way to get it.

He is a married man. Whether you like it or not he is taken. Just because he is flirting with you does not mean that you need to return the favor. Have some self respect sugar. You're better than that. Do not eat the first fish you catch in the net if you really aren't that hungry. Why? Because when you throw it back and catch another one, it's always bigger and better. Fantasizing is always appropriate, so I suggest you get a vibrator: adamandeve.com is a really good web site. Plus they have discreet packaging so nobody knows what the hell you bought. If you are shy, there are plenty of online dating sites. Yahoo Personals....Eharmony.com...etc.

Do not sleep with a married man. You can look but NEVER touch. That is somebody elses man. Somebody elses father. Do not screw that up for those people. And if you do, let me know how you can wake up every morning and look at yourself in the mirror. If he ends up cheating on his wife with somebody else then they are going to have to deal with that. Don't put yourself in that kind of a position. You probably aren't the only one that he has his eye on. Steer clear of this guy. He is bad news. A bad guy will always be a bad guy. And no matter how much you try he will never be yours...and you will never change him.

Answer 3

Look sorry to be harsh but you asked what you should do. Get a life! One of your own & not someone elses! If this man is unhappy in his marriage then he should file for divorce before going & meeting someone else. Do you have that little self respect that you would allow someone to use you like that? Is your self esteem that low? I mean do you really think he's going to leave his wife? You're just an easy piece of a** to him!
What have you been doing with yourself that your only excitement in 4 years is that a married man wants to f**k you?
Married men are attracted to other women all the time & don't act on it. Doesn't this tell you something about HIS character? He has no respect for his wife or his marriage vows (and we don't even know if he has kids!). And to top it off he has no respect for you either - you both know that he's not going to get a divorce so it will be just sex.
If you are that dumb and insecure enough to let him use you like that, at least least ask him to leave the money on the nightstand because that's all you are to him.

Answer 4

You know it isn't right to date a married man; so why ask the question? If you haven't been in a relationship for over 4 years, you should be well able to wait until the right man comes along. What you shouldn't do is interfere with another woman's marriage, because you're lonely. Your problem is that you need to leave this man alone. Be woman enough to walk away from this.

Answer 5

Don't do it. It is wrong on every level. Shame on him for even considering it. You only find it exciting because you havn't had a relationship in 4 years. Only bad things can come from anything you both do. You should stop every and all suggestive things, keep the conversation professional, and tell him you're not interested. He'll never leave her, he would have already left by now if he was ever going to. Don't waste your time. Find a single man, and build an honest, truthful relationship from the start. They're out there, that married man is just blocking you mentally and emotionally from finding them. DON'T DO IT!

Answer 6

I've been right there where you are and have chosen to actually do date the married man. I recommend you not to do it girl. You can save yourself from a huge heartache, choose for it hurt a lil now, then to hurt a lot when you be really in love with the man. Just take care of yourself. If this guy came along to get you excited, another will a long the line, but please dont choose to date the married men! It hurts too much after!

Answer 7

You're an ***hole if you're even CONSIDERING going out with a married man and possibly RUINING his life with his wife. Would you like to be cheated on if you were married?

Just because the only guy who's even remotely interested in you is married does *not* make cheating right. Go find yourself an *unattached* man for a change, if that's not too much of a problem for you.

Answer 8

Well, to answer your question... no it is not right to date a married man. However, it is what's forbidden that most intrigues us... unfortunately. Personally, I've dated married men and it was super fun. Anyhow, if he would be happy with his marriage he would not be seeking out anyone else. Which brings me to my point, sometimes us as women expect a man to be faithful just because we marry them and forget about having the responsibility to keep a man. Perhaps his wife stopped taking care of herself and her man so what's the man to do? I say you go for it and see what happens, you only live once, and marriage isn't set in stone.

Answer 9

This will not work because A) you work together. You really have nothing in common except lust and work B) you are both in a relationship. Just too messy. If one or the other was unattached, maybe hope for happily ever after for the 2 of you. But a breakup and a divorce is too much to get past c) If you just "date" even though you in a relationship and he married, wife/boyfriend will find out and there will be hell to pay. D) Just recently found out he was married. Doesn't he wear a ring? Maybe he screws around alot and you would be one of many he finds attractive. Walking STDs do nothing for me.

Enjoy the flirting but don't let it go any futher. if you can't get some fire back in your own relationship, dump your man and start looking again elsewhere (outside of work).

Answer 10

No, if you date a married man... that means, you're a home-wrecker... Think about what you are doing to his wife...

it has maybe been a while since you have been in a relationship, but there are other fish in the sea!
he's in a relationship, for the rest of his life.. with his wife, not you..

this must be a very difficult situation you're going through, but i think you should let him go. every moment you're with him, he'll become more attatched to you, and eventually you both will get caught.
im so sorry sweetie, but you'll get through this, and so will he.
but this is your life, you'll do what you want to do.. i hope it's the right thing...

Answer 11

Wow! Well, if you can handle yourself and not get attached with this man, then go for it. But it's really going to be hard to do because feelings may develope and when they do, you might not want to let go...or it may be too hard to let go. Understand that he won't leave his wife (family) for you and he if does, you won't be able to trust him. And that will be a MAJOR issue. So with all said, I say go for it and have some fun. It sounds like you haven't had any in a while so this may bring a little 'joy' or 'excitement' in your life. Just don't get caught up! Remain a lady, and be careful. I hope this helps. Good luck!!