Would this hurt your finances feelings???

Question

My finace and I have been engaged for 10 months now and will be getting marred this October. When he asked me to marry him we were both in school and broke! I was also so surprised I never had the chance to "let him know what types of rings i liked". DONT get me wrong i Love what my ring represents and that HE picked it out but i genuinly think its ugly!

No we are at a point in our lives where we have graduated and are making lots more money. My question is should I just keep my ring and never say a word or is there a nice way of keeping the diamonds, and band and upgrading? I really dont want to hurt his feelings but it really is ugly and he bought it at a bad time in his life. Is this vain or mean or b*tchy???? Its not just about having bigger diamond i would have MUCH MUCH rathered one stone verser a band with lots of little ones. I dont like showing it to people when they ask to see it :(

I want to keep the band for senimental reasons and incorporate the stones that I have into the new one. So I am keeping all that i have just changing it up.

Answer 1

Aren't you getting a new wedding ring when you get married??? If you aren't you could tell him that you want the both of you to design your own ring, that way you can still keep the stone (and the ring only in a different shape) If he asks you if aren't happy with your current ring tell him that want a ring that nobody else has ever seen and that will have sentimental value

Answer 2

My fiance likes to please, so when he got me a ring (which I loved) he didn't think it was good enough and went the step up by his own choice. But I am not the type of person that would say "I don't like this ring, I want a new one." I would feel like a horrible person, even if I HATED the ting and was embarrassed to show people. (I personally do not like certin rings and could be unhappy if he went another route). Alot of girls up the prices of their engagment ring, so don't let cost become a factor in wether you like the ring or not, most of the rings that cost grooms $3,000 suddenly become $10,000 in the brides eyes.
So, it really depends on the type of person your fiance is.

If you are really unhappy with it my suggestion is since you're almost married, pick out a new ring that would mimic both an engagement ring and a wedding band. A lot of these sets: http://www.zales.com/subcategory/index.jsp?categoryId=2115463&cp=2071133&clickid=hmp_weddingdrop_5 come with an engagement ring with a wedding band, just inform your fiance that you like the combo of the two rings to represent a wedding band.

Answer 3

Even though you are making lots more money I would rethink this. You've haven't had much of a problem with wearing the ring for ten months. I think the "lots more money" you have you should put towards a house or payments to other things than upgrading your ring.

You don't HAVE to wear the engagement ring with the wedding ring, I've seen women with just the wedding band.

You could always upgrade later, like a 5th or 10th wedding anniversary!

Answer 4

Get the ring you want -- and be happy.

I'd tell him what you aim to do, first. If you can afford the $8-12k for the upgrade, this issue becomens important because you'll only have ONE engagement ring. It was the ring and the symbol and the moment that was important, not the stone on the ring. He should understand, and if he starts saying things that are overly sentimental about the smaller diamond -- you've just learned something very, very important about him. That he's cheap, and will put money over your immediate happiness (vs. his) from now on.

Answer 5

Have you bought your wedding rings yet? Maybe hint to him when you are looking for wedding rings that you would like to make your engagement ring match the wedding rings, which means it may need a bit of an upgrade. I think he would understand if you approach it right. Just mention "now that we are out of school and are able to upgrade"...that way you reassure him that you know he gave you all that he could at the time. He probably wishes he could upgrade it. Are you planning on giving each other wedding gifts? If so you could have a family member of friend suggest to him that the perfect gift for you would be a ring upgrade.

Answer 6

*Fiance
I don't know how he would take it, you have to think of a good way to let him know without hurting his feelings. Besides how do you know he won't get you another one, what if he surprises you and buys you another one for the wedding? Maybe you should talk to him and when you guys go to a mall or something go into a jewelry store and show him what you like, but then again ask him what he likes, to not make it all obvious. Then ask him, don't go around the situation and tell him if you guys will be upgrading to better rings, since you are now in another point in your life. Best of luck and congratulations!

Answer 7

If you've got the money, buy a new bridal set as your wedding ring and just begin wearing that from your wedding on. But he may be hurt when you stop wearing your engagement ring.

If your engagement ring is a band, but a solitaire or something like that for your wedding band. When you wear the two rings together, it will look like you have a wedding band and an engagement ring. No one has to know they really came in the opposite order.

Answer 8

I see nothing wrong w/ upgrading, lots of ppl do it these days. Most are young when they get married, not wealthy and buy what can be afforded, so when they are able to afford better they buy it. I wouldn't tell him you think the ring is ugly but tell him you saw another that you really liked and wanted to upgrade.
I'm sure he would have liked to buy you the ring of dreams but he just couldn't afford it at the time.
You may be surprised how understanding he is about the whole thing.

Answer 9

I just recently got engaged myself and if my fiance' did not like it I would want her to tell me. It prob wouldn't hurt my feelings at all if she came to me and talked to me. Of course you would have to approach it very sensitively and acknowledge you know the reason for the ring and that the stones are good but maybe yall could pick out a new band together. Even if he gets a little hurt hopefully he really wants you to be happy with a ring that you will wear for the rest of your life.

Answer 10

you're very accomodating. that's what he needs. he's transforming into an abusive husband, i'm talking via journey. If he mistreat you or the youngsters, do no longer cook dinner what he likes, on the hour he needs, and start up doing each thing as you please. while he demands (he will use the notice ask) you to start suitable him back because of the fact he pays the charges (bla bla bla), tell him which you would be able to no longer satisfy your "duties" because of the fact he doesnt do his. If he doesnt exchange in few days-2 weeks, he's abusive. If he alterations, then he in simple terms grew to become into under pressure. via changing I imply: staying as a reliable man or woman perpetually. it is no longer announcing: i'm sorry, and after few days-3 weeks getting undesirable back, this is named a cycle, an abusive cycle. My suggestion, get a job, placed the youngsters in an afternoon care (i be attentive to you wont have money anyhow...yet shop examining) everytime you get an eternal place kick him, declare Head start up reward (day care), if he alterations for an prolonged time, bypass back with him. yet do no longer teach him which you're in a vulnerable place, or it gets worst, and he will start up dishonest and hurting you bodily. possibly you may think of i'm exagerating...yet my suggestion won't harm you, he will. in simple terms attempt it for few days and you will see what i'm talking approximately. i've got been in 2 abusive relationships already. my suitable needs