WHO IS JACK SCHITT???
For some time many of us have wondered just who is Jack
Schitt? We find ourselves at a loss when someone says, 'You don't know
Jack
Schitt!' Well, thanks to my genealogy efforts, you can now respond in an
intellectual way.
Jack Schitt is the only son of Awe Schitt. Awe Schitt,the fertilizer
magnate
married O. Schitt, the owner of Needeep N. Schitt, Inc. They had one
son,
Jack.
In turn, Jack Schitt married Noe Schitt. The deeply religious couple
produced six children: Holie Schitt, Giva Schitt, Fulla Schitt, Bull
Schitt,
and the twins Deep Schitt and Dip Schitt.
Against her parents' objections, Deep Schitt married
Dumb Schitt, a high school dropout. After being married 15 years, Jack
and
Noe Schitt divorced. Noe Schitt later married Ted Sherlock, and because
her
kids were living with them, she want ed to keep her previous name. She
was
then known as Noe Schitt Sherlock.
Meanwhile, Dip Schitt married Loda Schitt, and they produced a son with
a
rather nervous disposition named Chicken Schitt.
Two of the other six children, Fulla Schitt and Giva Schitt, were
inseparable throughout childhood and subsequently married the Happens
brothers in a dual ceremony. The wedding announcement in the newspaper
announced the Schitt-Happens nuptials. The Schitt-Happens children were
Dawg
Byrd, and Horse.
Bull Schitt, the prodigal son, left home to tour the world. He recently
returned from Italywith his new Italian bride, Pisa Schitt.
Now when someone says, 'You don't know JackSchitt,' you can correct
them.
Sincerely,
Crock O. Schitt
2007-08-10
02:35:05
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17 answers
·
asked by
Anonymous
in
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