I dated someone for 2 years and throughout our relationships there were moments when I didn't want o have sex. He knew this yet always asked me to do it for him and our relationship. When we did have sex I had tears coming down my face and he'd ask me if he could finish off. I didn't interact with him sexually I just laid there while he did it so that I could make "him happy." If I didn't say no yet he could see I didn't want it was it rape?
2007-08-09 17:58:30 · 30 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Gray area.
The rule is that if you ask him to stop, he is to stop.
Merely lying there is not the same as making a declarative statement to stop, but a man of real worth would see how you feel and stop.
It was what is referred to as "mate rape"
2007-08-09 18:04:35 · answer #1 · answered by Experto Credo 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋
You were in a relationship so it would be hard to determined if it was consensual. It would be your word against his word. If you that he was doing this to you and you did not want to you should have to him no any way. No means No! and having sex with someone for your relationship and for him is not worth it and you know that you could find someone better that will treat you like a princess and would respect when you say No! If i were you I would go to the police and let them know what has happened and tell them that you told him no and he did not listen. You know that you have to get out of that relationship he is not good for you and the longer you stay the more it will continue to happen and it may get even worse. Do what you know you need to do, the right thing.
2007-08-09 18:08:08 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
that is a hard one for me because i was with a guy for seven years and the same thing would happen but after a while i did start to say no but by that time he simply didn't care and took what wanted any way so yes i think in a way it is rape i mean what if for some reason you couldn't speak everyone would still think of it as rape right
2007-08-09 18:05:04 · answer #3 · answered by flkenout 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I wouldn't call it rape, but it is gross neglect for your feelings and selfish on his part. On the other hand you are also grossly neglecting your own feelings and hurting yourself to make him happy. Stop being a martyr and have some self respect.
Having sex is not the same as making love. Sex is a "me" thing, like you boyfriend gratifying himself at the expense of your feelings and to the detriment of your self worth.
Making love is a "we" thing. It is saying I Iove you with your body to someone who is saying the same to you.
You should never give in if it makes you feel that bad. You are letting him hurt you. Stop it!
2007-08-09 18:11:05 · answer #4 · answered by sara r 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Morally, maybe. But not legally, at least in the US.
Unless any of these factors were involved:
- Under any kind of duress (force, violence, blackmail, etc.)
- Judgmentally impaired or incapacitated by alcohol or drugs (legal or otherwise)
- Mentally impaired whether by illness or developmental disability
- Below the age of consent defined in that jurisdiction
2007-08-09 18:01:03 · answer #5 · answered by kenny 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Technically no, its not rape because you still let him do it, whether you wanted to or not. It would be rape if you told him no and he forced himself on you. But either way, he knew you didn't want it and kept pressuring you, so it's morally wrong and he's a selfish jerk.
2007-08-09 18:05:17 · answer #6 · answered by Spicy!!!!! 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Saying nothing is not consent! Technically this is rape, especially if you were upset and distraught while doing it. You have no obligation to anyone just under the impression that it will make them "happy".
You can look up anywhere that just because you were silent does not mean that you consented to having sex. Check it out.
2007-08-09 18:03:30 · answer #7 · answered by abrandnewday 2 · 1⤊ 2⤋
you wrote it yourself that you intentionally DID it to make him happy....how can it be rape?! you agreed to do it to keep your relationship alive and now that its over you are trying to find something nasty to say about this man. it takes two to tango, if you went along then, dont try to make it look different now. the only thing he is guilty of is being incensitive but definitely NOT rape.
2007-08-09 18:08:21 · answer #8 · answered by mr b 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you didnt want it, but you really didnt stop it or try to keep it from happening, but the way i view it....ITS STILL RAPE. a woman shouldn't be put in that situation. the way i see it, guys have the right to keep their hands and any other body parts to themselves at all times unless the girl/woman involved says otherwise.
2007-08-09 18:05:40 · answer #9 · answered by do_sctc145 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
The guy's a friggin' creep. Unfortunately, I don't believe it was "legally" rape. Either way he deserves to have it chopped off.
2007-08-09 18:05:35 · answer #10 · answered by J K 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋