when i was growing up my dad used to hit me i dont mean the odd slap on the bum i mean proper hit me and i stoped seeing him when i was 13 and always said i would never be like him and now ive started treating my partner like s**t he upsets me i want to hurt him i just feel like hitting him and today i did it wasnt like proper hit but he was holding my arms so i couldnt hit him and i dug all my nails in i hate myself for it inever wanted to hurt him but i have and its not fair on him and all i can see is me turning out like my dad and i dont want that i feel like leaving him so i cant hurt him anymore and at the moment i even feel like getting rid of myself because i have hurt him how can i stop this i dont want to be be like my dad i really dont and i love my partner so much but when i get angry its like i cant stop myself and i know its not right and i hate myself i really do!!!
2007-08-09 10:54:55 · 5 answers · asked by mummy to 3 miracles 5 in Health ➔ Mental Health
i know its not his fault he has just said that its better for me to do it than to bottle it all up and i know this probly sounds really silly but if i go to councilling then i feel like iv failed!!!! i should beable to just carry on and be ok i have been strong for everyone else and i feel like if i need councilling then im not being strong like im failing everyone else
2007-08-09 10:56:20 · update #1
It takes a lot of guts to actually do what you do: reach out for help.
I didn't want to treat my child as I have been treated by my mother---and it took a conscious effort each and every time something happened, years to accomplish. I turned out not to be a mom like mine was, but I still find that a lot of the things I grew up with seem to be embedded in me - so it is a lifelong conscious effort to see how sick the behavior is and finding ways to deal with the momentary anger to not fall back into this old pattern.
What I do is leave---I get up and take a nice long walk with my dog when I see that my anger wells up to the point where I would not be able to handle the situation properly, where I would act like my mom. Once I calmed down am I able to sort things out and then approach the situation in a much more mature and healthy way.
Call your local department of mental health and find out if they offer counseling and support groups to help you deal with this and learn how to change that pattern--because that's what it is: it is a behavior you grew up with, unconsciously got comfortable with, and therefore you got caught up in the same behavior---a pattern passed down.
Most departments of mental health do offer their own counseling services or have referrals and resources to use for those who need and want help. Good Luck
2007-08-09 11:07:18 · answer #1 · answered by rvrmldnd 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Only the Lord can change lives. You have an inherited evil spirit that came down from your father and he probably got it from his father. Someone must break the cycle. So let it stop with you.
Type into your computer, "Deliverance Ministry and your town & state." Normally this will find one closest to you. You have the spirit of anger, maybe the spirit of haughtiness, maybe also the spirit of heaviness because you are troubled and rejected and discouraged. This is tormenting you so the spirit of fear is also discerning in what you have said.
Call a Deliverance Ministry and explain to them what you said to YA. The Lord will deliver you if you will let Him. These ministers can help you pray and get your life right. You even said that you hate yourself so you even carry self-hatred which is not good at all.
"Perfect love casts out fear, because fear has torment." The only way to have "perfect love" is by Jesus Christ and knowledge of Him can remove so many burdens that you are carrying.
Jesus is your only hope. Man can't do anything with this but put a band aid on it. If you will do what the Deliverance Ministry tells you to do this will never happen again.
There is a Scripture that says, "We don't wrestle against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places." Ephesians 6:12
You are dealing with spiritual wickedness or evil spirits that need to be cast out because you are carrying ancestral sins that don't even belong to you. We have sins that we cause the curses to come on us, but we also have ancestral sins or the sins that our forefathers caused to come down to us.
Proverbs 26:2
"As the bird by wandering,
as the swallow by flying,
so the curse causeless
shall not come."
What this verse says is that a curse (beating on people) without a cause (sin of some kind) does not come on us. You could even have inherited more curses than just this one. A Deliverance Ministry will be able to tell you.
Trust the Lord and let Him deliver you. It is God who does the work, but these ministers can help you get your life right and discern any of the evil spirits within you.
Do you know how hard it is to tell people this? Most people think that I'm crazy, but you need help and the Lord is the only One who can deliver you from this evil spirit. Trust the Lord.
2007-08-09 18:27:58 · answer #2 · answered by Jeancommunicates 7 · 0⤊ 2⤋
Please do consider councilling. You have some unresolved issues and they can help you figure things out. Do it now before you do something you will regret. Don't let your father and his memories continue to dominate your life. You deserve better.
2007-08-09 18:06:13 · answer #3 · answered by mummy heffalump 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you shouldnt get really mad, like when you get mad and your about to do something, count to 10 in your mind, and stop, relax, and yeah...maybe just change your emotion
2007-08-09 17:59:43 · answer #4 · answered by Sheeeep! 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Speak to your doctor or friends about this .
2007-08-09 18:02:43 · answer #5 · answered by David K 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋