How can I get my not yet 2 year old to go to bed on time?

Question

My husband and friends say leave him in his room and let him cry it out and he will fall asleep. I really dont have the heart to do that when he is at the door, knocking saying "MMMooooooommy". My husband say thats manipulation. I dont know. I want to set a routine bed time for him but I dont want to give a complex about being shut up in a room by himself. HELP!!!

Answer 1

It's about control. If your husband is ok with leaving him and having him cry it out then you go to the gas station and get a fountain drink while he needs to fall asleep, or go for a walk when it's time for bed. He needs to stay in his room. You have to be strict and consistent. It's not mean to make a kid go to bed.

Answer 2

I have been a mom for 28 years to 4 kids (now ages 28, 25, 22, and 10) plus I have been a licensed child care provider in my home for 20 years. Sleep issues, followed closely by eating issues, top the list of problems parents face with their children. The bed time we would like our kids to have is not always the bed time that is right for their body clock. While I have used the "cry it out method" on certain occassions, I am not a really big advocate of it. I prefer it as a "last resort" method mostly during nap times for overly tired babies. My own children did not have regular parent-imposed bed times until they went to school. When our children were infants, toddlers, and pre-schoolers my husband and I were content with letting them set their own schedules (within reason, of course - we didn't go to bed while they were still up!). They all actually settled into routines that were best for them. Our middle daughter was quite happy with the 7 PM-7 AM sleep schedule while our youngest (born into a house filled with teenage siblings and their friends) preferred the 10 PM - 10 AM shift. A bedtime routine can work well, but you have to have some flexibility plus be prepared to try a lot of things before finding what works best. I have some claustraphobia issues and can't sleep with the bedroom door closed so we didn't close our kids' doors at bed-time. When our little ones showed up in the living room or in our bedroom or wherever we were, we'd take them by the hand back to their bed with a firm but gentle reminder that it was bed-time now. A tuck-in with a hug and a kiss had to happen maybe a dozen times before they finally went to sleep. All children, like all adults, require an amount of sleep that is unique to them. Very generally speaking, kids between 1-3 years old sleep 10-13 hours at night. If your son is consistently refusing to sleep at the bed-time that you have choosen, I would start by changing the time. It may be too early or too late (overly-tired kids are harded to get to sleep than you would think). Each of our kids liked different things at bed-time. Some had special "sleep-buddies" such as a stuffed animal or a special blanket. Some liked a night-light, some did not. Some had to wind down and liked to "read" books until they were tired. Our oldest woke numerous times during the night for drinks. We had her tested for diabetes (since it's in my husband's family), but it was just something she did. She still goes to bed with a bottle of water on her bedside table. If there is a lot of action going on at bed-time some kids just don't want to be left out so going to sleep is harder for them if a lot is going on. I suggest that you enlist your husband's help to establish a bedtime just right for your son and thank your friends for their advice if they offer it, but take it with a grain of salt.

Answer 3

I lay my twins down and tell them its bedtime. I get them a bottle with juice sometimes and they can't sleep without their blankets. I kiss them good nite and cover them and shut their door. They used to cry but now they will go lay down in their beds on their own when i tell them its bedtime most of the time. they don't fight it as much anymore. Kids just have to get used to it. If you don't want to do it have your husband lay them down and after no time it shouldnt be a problem anymore. It doesnt hurt them at all. Sure u feel guilty but it's not hurting them one bit. Try laying him down at the same time every nite too so they get a routine going. Try giving him a bath before bedtime to relax him. Maybe rock him a little to get him sleepy. Good luck

Answer 4

First off does he sleep in a toddler bed or a regular bed? I would suggest getting him a regular one if he's not in one yet.

You need to start a bedtime routine with him. Dinner, bath, book, bed. My 3yr watches some Disney channel show every night from 7:30-8. He knows that when it's over at 8pm, we brush our teeth, pick out a story and sit in bed. I read it and he goes to sleep. When he was younger, around your son's age, I set a timer. When the timer went off, he knew it was time to go upstairs. We would pick out a book and I would say "Ok after this book, we're going to sleep." Book was done, he got hugs and kisses and lights out. If he got upset, we bought him a little music box. He could open the music box and let it sing but he was not allowed out of his room.
I'd suggest the routine and looking for some kind of music box if as a baby he was one to listen to music (or some kind of stuffed animal/blanket). Put it in your room for a couple nights and show it to him. Then bring it into his room and tell him, "This helped me sleep. You can open it if you need to at night." If he cries, and trust me I KNOW THIS IS HARD, you need to leave him in there. Go in once, that's IT. Don't go back into his room after that. He's learning that if he cries or gets upset, you'll come back in. That's HIS routine and a habit you want to break. If you let him cry, 2-3 nights, he'll learn: Mom's not coming in if I cry, I need to go to sleep.
My middle son, who is now 7, was and still is my devil child. When he was little and he got punished and was put into his room, he'd throw fits, break stuff and throw things all over the room. He was the same way come bed time.One night, my husband and I took EVERYTHING out of his room and into the hallway. He was going to learn that throwing fits and breaking things wasn't going to get him attention. The following night, he started to cry right before bed and I said "Do you remember what happened last night?" 1 night, never threw a fit or broke anything again went it was time for bed or he was punished.
You're not being a horrible mother by letting him cry. He's not going to get sick or hurt himself if he cries. He'll learn once you start a routine and not go into his room every time he gets upset that this is what we do everything night. He'll get use to it, I PROMISE.
Best wishes =]

Answer 5

For two days in a row wake him up early and have a day planned out for him, do not let him nap all day keeping him busy even try putting him in the pool or getting wet outside closer in the late afternoon, when you see he cannot stay up much longer put him to bed,. be prepared to wake up eary and get going again, these two days will tire him out, he will get excited about whats planned for the next day, it will also tire you out but the long nights for u both will be rewarding

Answer 6

I think you will find out that they make there own hours.