Question regarding my boyfriends ex FIANCE?

Question

This is a kinda long story...my boyfriend and I have been dating for over a year...and I wouldnt say that we have a "fairytale" relationship but we are very good together. We get along and enjoy doing the same things. Well he had dated this girl before me...and from what everyone says she was only after his money and used him. Well...we started dating around May of last year...and everything is going great...no probs that I could tell. Well he use to work for Time Warner and had a work phone that no one had changed his message on...so in March I called it...and checked the messages on there...that might be bad but I was just curious to see if anyone had left him a message. Well...she had left him 2 messages! And they were like hey it's me just call me when you get a chance...so I didnt think anything of it...I asked him about it...but more than anything I was apologetic for checking because that's not something I normally do...ok well of course I kept checking periodically just

to see if she had called again...well she didn't for a while...or at least not that I know of because I think he may have been checking too...well one day in around June I called again...and there was a message from her stating that she was sorry for last night...***something I didnt say earlier was at the time I didnt know who she was he just said she was an old friend***Well I was like what the world?? Sorry for last night?? So I questioned him...he said that he didnt know that he hasnt seen or talked to her since like last year...well he told me she was from Bennettsville which is like an hour away...I didn't believe him at all...So I went the next day at work and checked the phone bill. And there were calls to Bennettsville on there EVERYDAY! Like a few times a day! And late at night also...like he would hang up with me and call her, ok? Well I asked him about it...and he said it was one of his friend's phones...well I had already called it and a woman was on the vm...I told

ok Daddy...you're an idiot...ANYWAY...so I told him I had called her and he kept on saying that maybe that was his mom's...now how crazy is that? Well finally he came clean...after all that...and I called and talked to her and she said nothing was going on with them that it was just friendly convo...well this has been going on since last October...and I have forgiven him...but how do you forget that and not think about it...it's not a matter of not trusting him because I know how much he loves me...and when I asked him why he couldn't give me an explanation. Why would he have done that??

Answer 1

if you dont trust him then you have a bigger issue then his ex, you will push him away by being like that... Tell him how nervous she makes you and talk it out, but you have to stop checking his messages..

Answer 2

Firstly, though I am not trying to make you feel bad but, it was wrong of you to check his calls but in any case if you didn't you wouldn't know what was going on. I don't think you realise or want to come to terms with it but I think there is definitely more to the calls than what is being said (too frequent and long and covered by lies). I had the same problem with my ex-fiance early in our relationship and it turned out that though it may have started as simple conversation on the phone it soon escalated to late night conversations for more than an hour and my question tp him was,'what do you have to talk to your ex-girlfriend about for so long?' He didn't even use to speak to me for so long on the phone. After much investigation however, I came to find out that they were seeing eachother. Of course when I went straight to his 'ex' she said that they just speak over the phone...........duh! But i didn't believe this one bit and after a while i caught them out together when he told me that he was out with his male friends and i just held on looking at them laughing and talking until it got more serious and they were kissing. It was then that i made myself visible and called everything off. It hurt really bad especially as I thought he really loved me (cause this is what he was showing me the whole time). I look at it as luck now when i look back at those times because if not, we could be married now and he could still be doing those things unknowing to me. Don't let love blind you, don't accuse him of being unfaithful without evidence but don't pull the curtain over your eyes either because you believe he loves you. Remember women love differently than men! If your instinct is telling you something is not right, then follow it for your sake!

Answer 3

u seem to have gotten cut off.
but neways, she might still like him but that doesnt mean he likes her.
if i were u, i would spend more time wiht him, whne he is wiht u, he cant be the the ex.

Answer 4

Why are you checking his voicemails, his msgs are for him not you. He should leave you for not being able to trust him

Answer 5

If you don't like what you find, stop looking for it...