I just got engaged. Where do i start?

Question

I assume that i would choose a date first. What is the average time that couples are engaged- 6, 9, 12 months?
Then whats next?

Answer 1

Well I have always hated long engagements so I would choose a date that is less than a year out. After that you can start looking at churches and reception sites that you would like to have and see if that date is open and reserve them. Then comes the fun part...finding your dress! Another thing that might help you is to go on www.theknot.com and print up a wedding checklist. That is what I did and it helped me a tremendous amount. I hope all of this helps. Good luck and have fun planning!

Answer 2

Most couples do set their date out 6 months to a year, but I just got engaged in June and our wedding is all planned and everything has been done and is ready- for October! We threw it together so quickly because our grandmothers have had medical issues and are not doing well. We would not even think of getting married without them there! Very close to grandmas and love them very much :}
So yes honestly just to show you it can all be thrown together that quickly, and this is a large 300 guest wedding w/ the works- big church and all
However we had a very hard time finding a church to give us a date, I probably called 500 churches and most of them said they had weddings booked all the way through next year already. So really we just got lucky
Go ahead and choose a date (most weddings are on a weekend so your guests will be able to come) and book the place for your ceremony and reception. Worry about everything else a little later down the line

Answer 3

give yourself enough time to plan so you won't feel too stressed. When picking your date also think about what time of year you want to get married. If you want a winter wedding but you feel like its too close to plan something you want then make it for next winter not this one. You are also going to want to book the reception soon because if you choose a popular time of year (spring and summer) you will have a hard time booking if you wait too long.
Before booking the reception get a general idea of how many people you will be inviting (maybe even sit down and make the guest list) your venue will need to know how many people you are inviting because they usually have limits on how many guests they can seat.
After booking your reception look into where you want the ceremony and book that too.
After booking the actual places where your wedding will be you can start thinking about the caterer and florist.
I would announce the date about 6 months from your wedding day (send out little save the date cards to the people on your guest list.)
The knot.com has a lot of good tips and has check lists that will help you a lot.
Good luck and Congratulations!

Answer 4

Time for engagement varies, but usually closer to a year in order to give adequate planning time, although it can be done much more quickly if you choose. You first want to pick a date. If you are to be married in a church, you usually need to let them know 6 months prior in order to complete any requirements they may have and to see that the date is available. Once a date is set for the ceremony, then go reception shopping. If both ceremony and reception will take place at the same place, it makes it a bit less complicated. But don't wait too long...some places will book years in advance. Good luck and congratulations!

Answer 5

You're right- first thing is setting a date. But don't focus on the average time to be engaged... be engaged for as long as you want/need to be engaged. Sure, some couples get married after being engaged for 6 months... some after 2 years... my fiance and I will have been engaged for 26 months, because that's when the timing was best for us.

Then you need to decide on the type of wedding you want to have. Destination? Small church ceremony? Large country club reception? This is important because your next step is booking your ceremony/reception site.

I recommend you visit a site like weddingchannel.com or theknot.com -- they have checklists that you can refer to as you countdown to your wedding date!

Good luck and congrats!

Answer 6

BUDGET IS FIRST.

Most people alter their original date. I was engaged a little over a year and had more time than I needed once I'd signed the initial contracts. But I didn't have any problems, anything fall through, nor did I have to switch my original date. For you, I'd have an idea of a date (perhaps a month) and start meeting with caterers, photographers, and reception halls. If there is a couple specific reception halls you are really interested in, do that first to make sure they have the date available. If not you may have to adjust to the next w/e.

For me I was on a tight budget so it was most important to talk to the caterers and photographers first since they are the largest chunk of your budget. There weren't many that were in my price range and a lot of the photographers had the date booked a solid year in advance (but that was partly b/c i was a june bride--you don't have as much trouble as a november bride)

If you are wanting to get married "off season" (that is not Valentines day, or May-July) you can have a shorter engagement b/c you don't need to book as much in advance. However in some of the large cities (I know this in Atlanta and Charlotte), many popular photographers and reception halls book up 18 months in advance. Duke Gardens requires you camp out the w/e you want one year in advance, b/c its so popular.

Honestly I disagree with most people on here about pick a date first. I think before you can do anything you have to set a BUDGET first. How can you talk to a caterer or photographer unless you know how much you are willing to spend on them? A great site that helps you adjust how much of your total budget should go to what is
www.ezweddingplanner.com
It was great for keeping up with guests list, who RSVPed, budget calculations, etc.

Unless the budget is endless and money is no object, most people overspend on a wedding b/c they sign contracts too fast and run out of money. Create a vision so that you know what you are wanting (mine was tropical) and that way you can shop for sales, express to the vendors what your vision is, and don't end up buying 3 different centerpieces b/c you were undecided.

Answer 7

Most people I know have had an engagement of about 8-12 months. You need to pick a few dates rather than just one at first. The avaiability of the church/reception hall will determine the exact date of the wedding.

Answer 8

Congratulations! I know it is exciting as I just got engaged 2 weeks ago and I had the very same question! Take a few weeks to just enjoy being engaged before you jump into planning because it can be very stressful. I have even started to feel it! But first pick your date and just go from there! Everything will come to you but I would definitely make a list of things and maybe log on to theknot.com it will help you out!

Congratulations again!

Answer 9

12 months. Yes, you need to choose a date first becuase that will determine ALOT. Depending on what season it is, you can then start to think about colors. For instance, you're not going to choose lavender as a color if the wedding is in October. See what I mean? So, yes...date comes first. Then, start thinking about BUDGET. That will also help you eliminate certain choices. I mean, if your budget is $5,000 then you're not exactly going to choose a photographer who has a fee of $2500. Start a tentative guest list. Do it in Excel (if you know the program) so you can insert addresses later. Start researching invitations, dresss styles, etc. Once you have your date, you can start shopping around for a venue....are you going to get married in a church or a different venue? Either way, it's important that you book the church or venue and the minister FIRST THING once you have a date. They get booked fast. Goodluck! Don't get overwhelmed. It's as fun as you make it - just don't stress out.

Answer 10

I wouldn't start with a date first...I would consider these things...
Do you have a particular season you like better?
does the style and color of the dress you would like yourself and bridesmaids to wear match that season... ?
If you are going to be married outside... what is the best time of year (consider weather and landscape)
do you want your honeymoon to be during summer time (lots of vacationers!!)
The length of time you are engaged is not important. I was dating for 3 years and engaged for 6 months... but there is no set rule - just give yourself enough time to plan everything!